Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

A bit overwhelmed

So I'm finishing up my degree this semester and I'm under a lot of stress since I'm hitting the final stretch. I took a break and went on facebook and so many of my friends had posted new pictures of their little ones. I broke down crying, I still am a bit. I know it's dangerous but my mind keeps circling back to the what-ifs. How much life would be different right now.  It just seems like the last week I've hoped back on the roller coaster of emotions. One minute I'm fine around baby related conversations and things; and the next second I've got to exit the room quickly to ball my eyes out. (Today I had to leave a class early because of a lady sitting near me. I don't think I've ever cried so hard in a public restroom before.) Is it cause I'm so stressed that I've been more up and down? Not to mention I've had a mild case of baby fever that's been off and on since our angles. I just needed to vent/whine.

Re: A bit overwhelmed

  • I'm so sorry. I know what you mean. Stress can play a role but more than anything I just think this is a normal part of the grieving process...well, it is for me anyway. The constant 'up and down' gets exhausting. I think also consciously or subconsciously we as mommies know there are milestones we are missing. I try my best not to pay attention to where I 'would've been' but I can't help it. In a few weeks I would be holding my little baby for the first time. It's crazy (for lack of a better term) how life can just change so suddenly and we are just left here wondering why. I think about where I would be with both my angel babies at this point. I have to stop myself because the sadness is just too much.

    Hang in there. I get it. And don't be hard on yourself. Let yourself grieve. You don't need another explanation. You lost a baby and you deserve all the time you need to have as many bad days as you want. The good days WILL outweigh the bad ones when YOU are ready to heal.
  • I am so sorry. I know it is hard there are things that should make me bawl but I am ok and then bam picking out a head of lettuce and I am in tears. Grief just isn't predictable.
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  • I definitely think stress adds to your emotions, at least for me. One minute I'm fine, the next tears out of the blue. You lost a part of you. It will take some time. I also think that the tears may never go away, just only lessen.
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