WWYD?

jellybean529

I'm considering taking DD on a trip to visit my XH's parents over the summer and visiting some friends up north (they're in CT, he's in LA, I'm in FL). My ILs and I are on good terms and they miss their granddaughter/niece (two of his sisters are there too), but would it be weird to go and not invite XH? He and I are friendly these days but I'm not really sure I want to vacation with him. But it is his parents so I almost feel obligated. WWYD?

20thirteen

I'd tell him. I wouldn't necessarily invite him, but I would at least let him know about it. Then you two can have a discussion about it and then come to an agreement if he gets miffed that you're visiting his parents with your DD without him, you know?

I hate my BD and haven't heard from him since January, but I would still probably tell him that I'm visiting his parents if I was.

jellybean529

Yeah that's kinda what I was thinking...I doubt he'd be miffed, he hardly calls his parents to even check in, and his mom's probably gonna come visit us down here in FL too without his being around, but yeah. I guess seeing as how it's his parents and all I should probably at least let him know.

jesuisfatiguee

Yep, just let him know. No invitation from you is necessary, since they're his parents.

freeatlast2014

If you are friendly and talk than it would probably be weird not telling him. But if his parents wanted him there they should invite him themselves. And I would hope they didn't do that without asking you if you were comfortable with it.

jellybean529

MrsLynnyD said:

If you are friendly and talk than it would probably be weird not telling him. But if his parents wanted him there they should invite him themselves. And I would hope they didn't do that without asking you if you were comfortable with it.

They actually didn't invite us up there, I'm just thinking about going up there right now...waiting to see if I can actually afford to go before I ask because I don't wanna get their hopes up I doubt they'd invite him without asking me first too, if I was already going to be there, his mom's pretty considerate.

MinnesotaMomma91

I am on board with pp, and your awesome for making the effort to see your ex in laws :-)

tig594

Since you were married so long it's normal to consider them family especially if you're all on good terms.  I'd go without him.  If you're friendly with XH and it comes up in a convo then it does.  I wouldn't necessarily go out of my way to tell him, though, or worry about it if I didn't.

jellybean529

I told him I was thinking of going and he was just like...cool, let me know if you need help with the plane tickets. NBD. I don't think he'll be able to go anyway because he'll be wrapping up his last class before graduation that month.