From Home to the Hospital - An Extended Birth Story

linzandjer11

Hey there natural birth buddies!

I just had my baby, but things didn't go the way we had planned. I wanted to share my birth story with you guys as an encouragement and maybe a few tips for when things don't go your way. 

Sporadic contractions started at 9:30pm after a day of trying all of the natural labor-induction methods. Convinced it was nothing, I went to bed. A couple hours later, I was up, uncomfortable, but a little more excited. I walked around, and the contractions were uncomfortable, but definitely bareable. We set up the birth pool and began filling it up. We called the midwife when the were averaging 45 sec long and 4 minutes apart. She decided to wait an hour before coming to our house for the planned homebirth. We continued to prep the house between contractions, talk and relax. 

The midwife and her assistants got to the house at 5:30am. By that time, I knew I was in labor and was making progress. My husband was awesome and helped me relax through each contraction and remember to breathe. After a little while, I threw up. I wanted to get in the birth pool, but it turned out the heater was broken. (disappointment #1) So, I got in our tiny bathtub, which was amazing - so much less tension and pressure! I think I would have really enjoyed the birth pool. At 6:30am, my midwife decided to check my cervix- I was fully dialated, but didn't feel a strong urge to push. I was starting to feel like I couldn't do it because I was so sleepy. (Cue the Bradley Emotional Map of Labor) 

My midwife had me get out of the tub and try some different pushing positions. She secretly told her assistants that she believed the baby would be here by 10:00am. Well, he wasn't. I worked with the midwives to learn how to push effectively and concentrate my pushes toward my perineum. They continued to suggest different positions and techniques, but it seemed like the baby was not moving down, despite my long, strong pushes. I decided to rest for a little bit and not work so hard pushing. I ate a little and came back with a renewed resolution to get the baby past my pelvis. My midwife decided to check me again. She realized the baby was not facing the correct way. She and the midwives tried to flip him a few times, but he couldn't stay that way; his head was molded to my pelvis in the wrong position. We tried pushing for one more hour and then decided it was time to transfer to the hospital (disappointment #2). 

[During the end of the pushing stage, my mother in law showed up uninvited. This was frustrating and a little stressful for me, considering I had told her a few times that she was only welcome AFTER the baby was born.]

I got dressed and limped to the car. At this point, my husband and I had been awake for 13 hours, eaten very little and had a 45 minute drive to the hospital. I had 10 pushing contractions in the car. Pushing relieved the pain, and I tried not to make too much noise for my poor husband's sake. We got to the hospital and parked in the 20 minute parking spot. We hobbled to the lobby and I got in a wheel chair, which was only mildly more comfortable than walking. 

The first nurse we encountered was very cold and uninviting. However, once we were moved into triage, the staff was more agreeable. 

Things to prepare for if you're in a hospital: 

• everyone will ask you the same questions a million times
  
• being polite, kind and humble will get you much farther than being uppity and rude
  
• the more informed you are the better decisions you will be able to make even when you're in labor. I found that I did not regret any decisions we made because I had done so much research. Always ask what options are available; there is rarely one way.
  

Luckily, I got an experienced doctor who was really on board at trying everything possible before moving to a C-section. We decided to get an epidural and to continue to try to push on my own. I really just wanted to sleep- I had been pushing for nearly 10 hours med-free at this point! The anesthesiologist gave me a spinal and then attempted an epidural. She thought it wouldn't work (disappointment #3), but tried again and it did! While it was really nice to be able to fully relax, I wouldn't choose an epidural again. I had learned how to push very effectively with the midwives when I could feel everything. The epidural took away that feeling and I did not feel strong or in control. 

After pushing with the epidural for about a half hour, the doctor suggested using a vacuum. She explained her experience, and that if we couldn't get the baby out using the vacuum, we would not be able to continue pushing and would need to get ahead to the OR for a C-section. She said she was confident that she would be able to help me get the baby out vaginally. We agreed and got set up. 

The doctor tried to flip the baby into the right position because his little head was sideways between anterior and posterior. Then she put the vacuum on and we started to get the baby out. I had my husband, the doctor and interns, my wonderful midwives and a couple nurses all around me cheering me on through the last pushes. My doctor was patient through those pushes. She did not try to rush the baby out and did not freak out when the baby's heart rate dropped during a push. (Breathing the oxygen deep in between contractions helped it pop back up.) I pushed and pushed for another half hour and our little boy came out face-up, staring at my husband. They cut the cord immediately (disappointment #4) and took him away to examine him for the first 10 minutes (disappointment #5). Finally, after 21 hours of labor, I was able to hold my little bundle. 

Again, this was far from the birth we planned, but we are so pleased with how it turned out. We avoided a C-section and had a baby vaginally. I only had meds in my system for the last 2 hours of labor. I gave it my best shot at home, and still feel accomplished for how long I pushed. The baby just got into a position that needed extra help. 

Post-partum care at the hospital is what I have been the most disappointed with. The doctors were really jumpy about jaundice and wanted to start all of these interventions including starting formula and extreme phototherapy. We had to fight our way home. Now that we're home, things are as they should be and our baby is healthy and awesome. 

No matter what kind of birth you are planning, try to keep an open mind. I think I am far less disappointed because I knew that going to the hospital was a possibility.

Sorry it's so long! Thanks for reading! I hope it was helpful in some way. Happy birthing!

rooftop

congrats darling. I'm sorry it didn't go the way you wanted but glad it turned out better than it could have. Do you think things would have gone differant if you had had a written plan for newborn care?

pepperedmoth

Thank you for sharing! I am super impressed and reassured by how, even when things didn't go as expected, you didn't tumble down into that intervention cascade that always freaks me out. It sounds like you were amazingly calm and controlled throughout --- I'm sure the reality was scarier than the story, but I really am so impressed with your composure! Hard to imagine how it could have turned out better under the circumstances.

And CONGRATULATIONS on your BABY!!!

jmknox

Wow congrats! Gold stars, medals and my hat off to you. Good gracious that was a lot.

momofmanyinthemitten

Congrats on the baby and keeping your calm when things didn't quite go your way! We had to use the vacuum with my VBAC because my DS was stuck too, but I was so glad I could birth him vaginally.

aylafsu88

Congrats! You did a wonderful job and had a great support team. I am amazed at your calm, focused attitude especially when things were stressful. Thank you for sharing your story.

SidraJedi

Congratulations. I am sorry that you had so many disappointments but you did so well! I hope that I would have done the exact same in your shoes.