What things do you expect your nanny to do?

JulyMomma2U2

In my job posting, I listed "light housework" as something we were looking for.  While interviewing nannies, my expectations, I thought, were pretty clear in the sense that I wasn't looking for anything crazy, just that you pick up after the kids from day to day, so when we come home there's not a huge mess of toys, etc, and that if you get a chance and are able to clean the bottles from the day and the dishes from lunch or what not, that'd be great, too.  I figured eventually, if I ever needed her to pop something pre-prepped into the oven for us so it's done when we get home, that'd be fine, too.. etc.

My husband WFH 2 of the 3 days we have a nanny come.. and, he made a HUGE mistake by telling the nanny "don't worry about picking up, the kids will just make a mess after you leave"... to which, she responded "Ok", and now doesn't pick up.  I could seriously SMACK him for this.  Because, now it means every day we come home each room they've been in has toys out.. I mean, it's not usually a HUGE mess, but it takes me a good 20 minutes or more to pick up all the toys between the family room and playroom and then wash the dishes and bottles, etc..

It's super awkward to go back to her and be like "hey, btw, I know my husband said you don't have to pick anything up, but, could you ignore him and start doing that?".. I was thinking of trying to spin it like we're trying to encourage DS1 to start helping with clean up and make smaller messes (only take out a few things at once).. and see if maybe that would help with things?  Idk.

What do you think?

I still very much have everything set up and prepared for her.. like, baby formula made, bottles poured, oatmeal made, DS 1's lunch prepped, etc.. I know 2 close in age is tricky, so I've tried to make it easier.. but, my hope was once she was more acclimated, I could eventually ease off of prepping so much for her, and she'd be okay doing that herself.. but, my Mom was saying we may end up in a similar situation.. she may get used to me doing it all and then come to expect that.. idk?  I'm so unfamiliar with all of this!

djm31012

I dont have a nanny but when we were interviewing people, light housekeeping was definitely on my list of expectations..and that included solely taking care of the kids. I would not expect to come home to a sink full of dirty bottles...thats easy to take care of. Toys should, to the best of her ability, be picked up after, even if that means her doing it for 5 minutes right when you get home. It wont be perfect or spotless, you have 2 tiny kids..but to the best of her ability it should be straightened up so when you get home you can be focused on spending time with your children. The children are her responsibility during the day, so in my book, that would mean cleaning up after them...when I was looking for a nanny...that was something on my list. Again, you have to be reasonable about it...but thats not out of the ordinary.

i think you can definitely go back to her and just say listen i know DH said one thing, but it really helps me a ton if everythign that has to do with the kids is taken care of before I am home. I understand ALL toys cant be put away but please pick up to the best of your ability and pls make sure any dishes related to the children are done. You are the employer..you have every right to make that request.

PSU_Texan

Do you have a contract that clearly states the expectations with regards to "light housework"?  If so, refer back to that when clarifying that your husband was wrong.  If not, you need to have a sit down and reframe expectations. 

For us, we expect to come home to a tidy but not white-glove clean house.  Toys should be put away (she does this with the kids to teach them how to clean after themselves), kitchen should be cleaned up (no dirty dishes/ok to have freshly washed prep dishes towel drying), etc.  We do ask her to prep dinner and she is also responsible for the kids meals/snacks.  I don't do any prep for their lunch/snacks but will sometimes give a head start on dinner items.  She is also responsible for the kids laundry.  The reason dinner is part of her duties now is that the kids are in school a good bit of the day.  So I recognize that this may not work for you since you have little ones.  But you should not have to do major prep ahead of her showing up.  That's the beauty of a nanny.

jf198400

The benefit of having a nanny is Not doing all the prep work. Start showing the nanny what you want her to do- how to prep the bottles, what to feed for snacks and lunch, but let her do it. You need to set expectations now.

rockychryslerb2010

My nanny is amazing and goes above and beyond what is in our agreement, but this is what she does, and she took on more responsibility as E got older and started sleeping 2-3 hr stretches:

1 - pick up  playroom and E's room at the end of the day (she really does it throughout the day to keep it orderly)
2 - cleans our kitchen every morning - loads / unloads dishwasher, washes dishes and cleans the counters
3 - always did E's laundry, but started doing DH and my laundry as well (wash / dry and fold)
4 - walks our dog in the mornings / evenings
5 - When E was still getting bottles - cleaned all my pump parts, bottle components and prepped all the breastmilk herself
6 - does all the meal prep for ethan for breakfast, lunch and snacks
7 - will put something in the oven or turn on crockpot if i ask in the morning
8 - and because I got super lucky to have a nanny that was a professional organizer in a past life, she cleans our pantry and cabinets when they get out of control

Her philosophy is that she wants to do everything she can to make sure when I get home, I can spend time with E and not worry about the household stuff.  She is truly amazing and really, all of the above is why I'm satisfied paying more for a nanny over a regular daycare.

JulyMomma2U2

@rockychryslerb2010 I want your nanny!! Minus doing mine and DHs laundry.. I have a "thing" about anyone else doing my laundry except DH or I.. my Mom and MIL always do a load here and there when they have watched the boys for a day in the past, but it freaks me out.. idk why!! But, everything else you say your Nanny does.. way jealous!!

BeckyP005

I agree with all the posters. Correct it now. When I was a nanny I did kid's clothes..picked up/washed toys...emptied/loaded dishwasher...grocery shopping..started dinner...kept the nursery and other child's bedroom clean and just made sure everything was nice and neat when parent's came home. I really didn't have to do adult laundry since they had a housekeeper too. Jeez...it's hard to remember since it's been like 20 years!! I'm sure I did other stuff. Here is the kicker...I'm still with the family...full time

SoMoNY

Care for my two boys, that is all.

I expect her to clean up after herself but not us.  She gets my oldest to put away his toys and plate in the sink. 

If she has a lot of free time thanks to long naps she'll unload dishwasher or fold clothes in dryer but I don't expect that from her on a daily basis.

ebp913

I expect our nanny to clean up after the kids including toys and the dirty dishes they create during the day.  I'd like to start asking her to help with the kids laundry but I haven't yet.