Overwhelming feelings

bell18b

I am 33 years old and about 8 weeks pregnant with my first baby. Once I found out I was pregnant its been a bit of a emotional roller-coaster, mixture of excitement and fear. One of my main problems is that it took us 2 years to conceive and in that time I have become so complacent with my life. I am very active and have many activities and hobbies. Especially running, I love competing in races. I have never been a baby crazy person, but I have always desired a family. I am worried about making the adjustment. Any advice would be helpful.

PrincessPix

I was just having those same anxieties! I'm also 33 and am pretty set in life... We had a struggle conceiving, so I know we really want this, but I'm afraid I'm going to have trouble adjusting... We too have a really fast paced life, and I'm afraid I won't be able to juggle it all...

I think once the LO is here, nothing else will seem important, and we'll just fall into a new routine!

Best of luck to you and your transitioning!

rlyttle

Don't worry, I'm not a kid person at ALL. there is something about your own kids that are very different. It will all be very natural and you won't be able to imagine your life without a child. Sounds like you need a jogging stroller!!

Ladiebug710

Exactly what @rlyttle said.  Your feeling about your own kids are totally different.  Life changes a lot, but in really good ways.  I was 33 when I had my first, and even though I was "ready" I was really nervous about what my life would be like.  Yes I do miss some me time, but those moments are far out numbered by the happy amazing moments I would never have had without LO in my life.

bf43005

I have thought the same things since I will be 33 when the baby is born.  I think at one point I told DH that we could put the baby in an inflatable raft that we could tow behind our kayaks.  LOL!  I can only hope I come up with better ways to do the things we love and be parents at the same time. 

nonoemily

It takes time to get adjusted and get your life back into balance. I hike a lot and love outdoor activities, I rely on grandparents to watch my son while I'm hiking, and now that he's older we go on "baby hikes" together. Get a jogging stroller, a baby wearing contraption of some kind, and a reliable childcare provider. You won't be able to do everything you used to right away, but eventually you'll find a way to be a mom and still be YOU.

SissyKate21

nonoemily said:

...eventually you'll find a way to be a mom and still be YOU.

THIS. 

Don't expect it to happen right away. Allow yourself time off from some of those activities. Too many expectations on yourself will only overwhelm you more. Give yourself permission to be solely focused on learning this mom-thing for a while. I actually had a very difficult time adjusting after DD was born. I'm sure it was partially PPD and partially the total lack of comprehension about how much change was going to occur in my life. I felt out of control of everything - because I wanted to do it all. I felt like I was never going to be 'me' again. But that's just a lie. I still can't juggle everything that I used to do and am now responsible for - but I have a new balance that I created - and I've also discovered new interests along the way. 
One misstep on my part was that I didn't allow myself to grieve the loss of things I had known for so long - independence, flexible schedule, sleep, certain friends...if I had allowed myself to talk to someone about how much I missed some of those things, I'm sure I would have healed. But I didn't. I felt like I was supposed to be happy and thankful and full of sunshine and rainbows all the time, after all, I was a MOM! And I basically became a basket case on the inside. And then, I got better. And then I started talking and discovering that other people felt the same. And I discovered that I could reclaim my body and my interests (it just took some time). For example, once I knew I was mentally and physically ready, I took a year and signed up for every race I possibly could. It was the summer that I rebuilt 'me'. 
Some people may not understand that you can love this new life as a mom and also mourn the loss of your not-mom-ness. Or, that being a mom isn't exactly natural for everyone. FYI - you don't automatically know what to do when the kid pops out...I have never felt more incompetent in my life; that was a new feeling for me, too. 
Give yourself space to feel, to grow, to heal, to love, to enjoy, to cry...you're a woman who can - and will - adapt and change and learn. I believe you will be blessed because of the (messy, painful, uncomfortable) journey. 

I hope that made sense. I rambled...

jlovesky

I can't personally relate here but I know a mom who maintains a very fast-paced life with 3 little ones & her 4th on the way!. I just saw that she ran an 8-mile race this past weekend while 8 months pregnant! You can do it!! Good luck!

bell18b

Thanks all for the kind words. I am still nervous but feel a little better.