Where to start?

laxin31

So I am not the most "in-tune" kind of person when it comes to having kids or really being around kids.  I know a few things but I enjoy being able to give the child back to mom and dad at the end of the day.  Yes I have nephews and when I am around them normally I had others around me too.  I don't have a lot of friends where I live and I am not ready for the whole world to know I am pregnant just yet.  

My mother in law wanted to know what she could buy us a crib or a car seat.  Now I started looking at car seats and I am just overwhelmed.  I mean I know I am still in my first trimester and need to at least get to my second but I thought I would just take a look.  When do people start buying things in general? How do you know you are making a good choice on certain things....There is just so much. 

AKB090609

Check out https://www.lucieslist.com that should help you narrow things down. If that is not enough information for you Baby Bargains is another great resource. As far as when to buy that is personal preference, for me I will buy little things or items that are a great price at any time. I do wait for big ticket items until after the anatomy scan or 24 weeks. I waited until 36 weeks to buy my car seat because I wanted to get the latest possible manufacture date and still to have time to instal it. I did most of my shopping on amazon because between the free 2 day shipping with prime and their better prices (plus 1 year return policy NOW 90 days) I felt like I could really think about my purchases.

LittleFish1

You have pleanty of time. I waited until about 4 weeks before my due date before making decisions & ordering things (agree about Amazon prime or Amazon mom). Had a friend who had everything ordered and set up by her 5th month of pregnancy. Would just look around for now to get an idea for prices, styles & your preferences. If you're trying to keep on a particular budget, would ask around about local consignment shops & baby sales or moms groups which might have a mom to mom sale (my moms group has an email listserve we can sign up for. Maternity clotes, cribs, strollers, baby clothing, pack n play, are all common items). There are some things you can get 2nd hand, others like car seats & crib mattresses would get new.

Look back at older topics for ideas. In the very beginning, you truly do not need a lot. Woild let your MIL pay for the crib rather than a crib set. You only really need the mattress protector & fitted crib sheet for at least the first year.

melaport

If you are planning on purchasing furniture, just make sure to give enough time for it to be ordered.  We were told 8-12 weeks for our furniture from Buy Buy Baby & it came in 5 weeks after we ordered it.  On the other hand, we were told 8 weeks on our glider & it took exactly that.  This will definitely vary if you are choosing something that needs to be ordered versus an in stock item so just something to keep in mind.  

LittleFish1

Good point @melaport I went for all instock items where as my friend special ordered & had some delays with their order. I think they also had to return something because had damage. If going through Buy Buy Baby, or Babies R Us, the crib price can be price matched with competitor or will take coupon (BBBaby doesn't do both). Starting out with a bassinet type item is fine as well.

LittleApple

Like PP mentioned, Lucie's List will help get you started.  Sign up for the emails too.

ss265

I was in the exact same situation as you - not really a kid/baby person and completely overwhelmed by all the choices out there. Definitely check out lucies list and the baby bargains book. I did not buy anything until a month after my anatomy scan because it took me that long to get comfortable on what to buy. Also, don't feel pressure to have the nursery complete before the baby arrives - our nursery was a work in progress until my son was 5-6 months old.

dogperson11

I began building my registry (kept it private so it wasn't searchable) when we were TTC because I'm the type of person that reads reviews and researches to death. You don't need half the stuff on the "suggested" lists at BRU and other baby stores. Start simple - a place for baby to sleep (crib), a way to feed baby (it's good to have a few bottles on hand even if you plan to breast feed), a few blankets, diapers/wipes, and a car seat.

I found Amazon reviews the most helpful in choosing the other stuff (sound machine, swaddlers, pack n play, high chair, stroller, etc.).

If you have a consignment baby store around if start there, but there are a few items you never want to buy used. Never buy a used crib (standards change and if the crib is missing even 1 screw it can affect the safety) or a used car seat (once a car seat is in a crash it should never be used again. If the straps are washed incorrectly it shouldn't be used again. If it was "checked" luggage it shouldn't be used again).

For larger items (car seat and stroller) I would HIGHLY suggest playing with them in person to decide what you like and don't like. All car seats in the US have to meet the same minimum safety standards, so don't worry about one brand being safer then another, because the general public has no knowledge of that information. The safest car seat is one that fits your child and is installed correctly in your vehicle. For a car seat look for something that has a front adjust and is easy for you to get in and out of the base. The Graco Snugride 30 or 35 or Chicco Keyfit 30 are very popular seats because of their ease of use and installation. For a stroller practice folding and unfolding it. Push it around the store with some weight in it (grab some gallon water bottles). Get a feel for how it turns, how the brakes work, how heavy it is.

Good luck!

ETA: spelling

dmurrie

Ditto on ordering the furniture a bit farther out. We had to call for replacements for some damaged parts, too. They sent them with no problems but it does take that extra time. Babies r us had a lot (particularly the less expensive but still awesome) of cribs available only to order online and ship to home. Cribs that convert to toddler beds are good.

Also, if you're planning on more kids in the future, I would try to stay as gender-neutral as possible on the big ticket items. (And remember that they aren't always right about who they think you're expecting). Car seats, pack n plays, swings, etc all get pricey. You don't want to have to buy again if you don't want your boy in a pink car seat later on!

You'll find a lot of discussion on here about crib bumpers and bedding sets. My take is to save the $ and go with just the fitted sheets and maybe some nice wall clings. You really don't end up using the rest.

As for car seats, they all have to pass the same safety tests, so it's a matter of personal preference. I definitely recomnend thd infant carrier car seat, even though you don't use it for long, it is so much easier. The car seats have different balance points and weight distribution when you carry them, so check that out to see what you like the feel of. If you're getting one as part of a stroller system, check out the strollers real well and make sure they fit in your car! (babies r us at least will let you take them out to your car to make sure... you'll either have to take an associate with you or leave a drivers license) Again, if you think more kids are in your future, something to keep in mind is that not all brands make a sit n stand stroller. No one warned us about that one when we had our first!

Pack n plays are good, especially for visiting or traveling, but also if you want to use them as a bassinet at first. DD is 3 1/2 and just outgrew the PNP (granted, she is a skinny mini. She's technically still barely within the weight limit but is a couple inches over the height).

I think our shower was about month and a half before I was due, so we did our registry and released it into the wild at about 30 weeks or so. The car seat, somewhere to sleep, bottles if you're formula feeding, formula, wipes, diapers, and a couple onesies are all you really need to have when the baby arrives. The rest is convenience or just for fun.

If you're having a big shower or have a few people who like to buy big ticket items, I'd recommend registering for your convertible car seat, too. You can actually use a convertible from birth, so if you're strapped for cash, it's less convenient, but you could just skip the infant carrier car seat and only use a convertible car seat. If your car has the latch, the easiest convertible seats to install have belt-buckle-like clips with a button release on them.

Wow. Sorry, that was rather a lot. You have time, so no need to rush, but you can always start to browse when you feel the urge. Oh, and the store lists will recommend that you register for things like matching clothes hangers. Unless you're OCD about that type of thing, you can certainly skip those kinds of "necessities."

dmurrie

One more quick thing, even if you aren't having a shower, still go and register for the stuff you want. The stores have a registry completion deal where you can go in once and buy up anything on your registry at a discount. It adds up, too!

ss265

dmurrie said:

Ditto on ordering the furniture a bit farther out. We had to call for replacements for some damaged parts, too. They sent them with no problems but it does take that extra time. Babies r us had a lot (particularly the less expensive but still awesome) of cribs available only to order online and ship to home. Cribs that convert to toddler beds are good. Also, if you're planning on more kids in the future, I would try to stay as gender-neutral as possible on the big ticket items. (And remember that they aren't always right about who they think you're expecting). Car seats, pack n plays, swings, etc all get pricey. You don't want to have to buy again if you don't want your boy in a pink car seat later on! You'll find a lot of discussion on here about crib bumpers and bedding sets. My take is to save the $ and go with just the fitted sheets and maybe some nice wall clings. You really don't end up using the rest. As for car seats, they all have to pass the same safety tests, so it's a matter of personal preference. I definitely recomnend thd infant carrier car seat, even though you don't use it for long, it is so much easier. The car seats have different balance points and weight distribution when you carry them, so check that out to see what you like the feel of. If you're getting one as part of a stroller system, check out the strollers real well and make sure they fit in your car! (babies r us at least will let you take them out to your car to make sure... you'll either have to take an associate with you or leave a drivers license) Again, if you think more kids are in your future, something to keep in mind is that not all brands make a sit n stand stroller. No one warned us about that one when we had our first! Pack n plays are good, especially for visiting or traveling, but also if you want to use them as a bassinet at first. DD is 3 1/2 and just outgrew the PNP (granted, she is a skinny mini. She's technically still barely within the weight limit but is a couple inches over the height). I think our shower was about month and a half before I was due, so we did our registry and released it into the wild at about 30 weeks or so. The car seat, somewhere to sleep, bottles if you're formula feeding, formula, wipes, diapers, and a couple onesies are all you really need to have when the baby arrives. The rest is convenience or just for fun. If you're having a big shower or have a few people who like to buy big ticket items, I'd recommend registering for your convertible car seat, too. You can actually use a convertible from birth, so if you're strapped for cash, it's less convenient, but you could just skip the infant carrier car seat and only use a convertible car seat. If your car has the latch, the easiest convertible seats to install have belt-buckle-like clips with a button release on them. Wow. Sorry, that was rather a lot. You have time, so no need to rush, but you can always start to browse when you feel the urge. Oh, and the store lists will recommend that you register for things like matching clothes hangers. Unless you're OCD about that type of thing, you can certainly skip those kinds of "necessities."

I just wanted to add that if you are not planning to use a convertible car seat from birth and intend to use it later on, I would not put one on your registry. Car seats expire usually 6-8 years from the manufacture date so if you buy it too early, you would get less use time out of it.

dufferoo

Another vote for lucieslist as the best crash course ever! But also, to put this in perspective, you could literally go to Walmart and get the shittiest version of every single baby item you need, and be just fine. So go ahead and research and make lists and read reviews and discuss and hem and haw and stress (like we all do!), but at the end of the day, realize that as long as something meets basic safety requirements, it's probably "good enough." Point being, have fun picking out the stuff you really like, but don't drive yourself nuts. There really are no wrong decisions here. You'll be fine no matter what you choose, and you can always troubleshoot later once you have that baby in action.

SunAndRain

Adding to the GREAT advice given already. 

If you really can't decide you can always narrow down the options and let your MIL have final say.  She might really like getting to "choose"!  Say you pick one or two models and then select a couple colors that you like.  That'll give her a couple price points to choose from too.

As for models I'd look at Chicco and Britax.  those seem to be most recommended and popular.  I LOVED our Chicco and even splurged on the Chicco snapngo which turned out to be an awesome investment.

Prices of cribs vary more than those of car seats so it depends on the price point of the crib you choose as to whether I'd ask anyone to gift that item.

Also, avoid registering for clothes and books.  People buy random stuff and even though I didn't love 100% of the items given to DD, it was still fun to dress her in different styles and people liked seeing her in the items they specifically selected for her.

Books! I asked my aunt and my mom's friend for books when they asked what we needed.  Between the two of them they outfitted DD with the most awesome library any child could wish for.  As time went on they and others continue to add to it.  So there is another idea for those who ask what you want if you suspect they'll be giving bigger gifts.  And it is never too early to start reading to your child.

I tend to be a minimalist yet it is mind boggling all the baby stuff we ended up with.  So my last piece of advice is to think about the bare minimum you'll need and focus on the first 6 months.  You can always add to it later and as you get to know other moms they might just give you stuff they are not using, or you can swap or at least try before you buy. 

dmurrie

Just FYI, Chicco doesn't make a sit n stand yet. :-( I second avoiding registering for clothes except maybe sleep sacks and a good coat for LO... or an outfit or two you really love. You will be surprised how many clothes magically appear. Also, DD just turned 3 1/2, and last week I purchased the first baby wash since she was born. We've been going off of what we got at the shower until then. We also received a LOT of teething rings and car seat toys...