At my wits end

maryxc1

DS has been fussy ever since birth. When he was an infant, he almost always wanted to be held vertically and walked around. He cried for anybody but me, even DH. Now that he is older, he is whiny or throwing tantrums the vast majority of the time. He is occasionally happy, but that is the exception. I am a FTM and have always just told myself it was normal but I am not so sure. He sleeps pretty well and gets 11.5 hours at night and one nap that is 1.5-2.5 hours. He does not eat well. He eats very little at meals and begs for snacks all day, a habit I try not to allow. He refuses to eat anything but bread products, fruit, and cheese. My question is, is his disposition normal behavior or is there something wrong? Am I doing something wrong? I just don't know what to do. DH and I had planned to have a second child but we just don't think we can go through this again, especially not knowing if or when it will get better.

jil1210

Sorry, that sounds tough. My DD has all of those behaviors but I would say they are infrequent. Have you talked to your pediatrician about your concerns?

When DD was an infant I kept pestering her pediatrician about how DD's sleep wasn't normal (she only slept about 8-9 hours total and most of it during the day). She reassured me that normal has a wide range and not to worry as long as your child is meeting the developmental milestones and growing.

Is your son able to verbalize his frustrations?

You might benefit from reading Happiest Toddler on the Block, there is also a DVD.

My DD has become a picky eater lately and I am constantly puréeing greens to add them to bread, sauces even pancakes!

Hope this helps! Hang in there.

GromMom

Well if it helps you my son is very easy except he still does not sttn. So my guess is if you have it hard in some areas you have it easier in others. My friends son won't eat for her but he goes to bed without a fuss and naps perfectly. I guess we all have strengths and weaknesses. My son walked later at 18 months and we almost broke our backs carrying him as he was in the 100th percentile, while a friend has a younger daughter that walked early and can already swim! So I guess my point is that everyone is different

najzomax

My daughter shows a lot of the qualities you described. She took 10 months to be happy with DH and only recently starting letting some of her grandparents pick her up. She only wanted mommy for a very long time and even now has days where I wear her because she just wants to be held all day. We have always described her a high needs baby and baby wearing and co sleeping are tools we still use. Some days she eats great and other days she wants to live off apples and Cheerios. I think it's normal and he sounds like he is high needs too. The principles of attachment parenting really helped me adjust to what she needed from me and I find it helps our days go smoother. We believe that the more we meet her needs the less clingy she will become and so far that is proving true.

bellelamb

First let me say you are NOT doing anything wrong!! You are doing great some kids are more high needs than others BUT if my child was unhappy more than happy I would be looking for answers simply because no one should have to live like that.

My first guess would be a food intolerance. What you described was my sister to a tea, she had a difficult childhood and was diagnosed as a celiac as a teen. After going off wheat for years she is a much happier person. It breaks my moms heart she couldn't have helped her sooner.

So I say go with your gut if you think something is wrong find someone to help you figure out what it is.

selockar

I agree with bellelamb. When I was reading your post I was thinking food intolerance too. It might be worth talking to your pedi about. At the very least your pedi might be able to reassure you that you aren't doing anything wrong.