Going back part time after maternity leave

kimmee1997

When I went on maternity leave I planned to come back full time. I had some issues with my pregnancy and probably shouldn't have let work get to me as much as I did. I ended up having to have my son early because of IUGR, high blood pressure, and low amniotic fluid. He was born a month early at 36 weeks and ended up being smaller than they thought. He weighed almost 4 1/2 pounds. He ended up spending time in nicu for about 2 weeks. When he left nicu, it was stressed about how we need to limit contact and how much higher risk he was for RSV. Well, fast forward to 3 weeks later I had to take my older son to the ER for croup for which he was treated. We went to the pediatrician soon after and ds1 was given an inhaler and diagnosed with asthma. Ds1 got sick again on the heels of the croup and in turn ds2 caught it from him. We ended up having to take ds2 to the children's hospital ER where he was admitted and found out he had RSV and bronchiolitis. He was just discharged earlier this week after a 5 night stay.

I planned to start back to work soon. But with all the health issues, I don't feel comfortable going back full time. My husband thinks I should go back part time and so do I, but I just don't know how or when to talk to my boss. I wasn't expecting all this when I went on maternity leave, and now my priorities have changed some. Ds2 is still coughing a lot, still having retractions and having to work to breathe, we still have issues with choking easily during feedings. They told us when we left that it will be like that for awhile, but I don't feel comfortable leaving him for a long time with him like that. I just know that I need to talk to my boss but I am not sure how or what to even say. I feel bad that I am going to have this talk towards the end of my maternity leave. I think they will keep me at part time if only to bide time until they find a full time person. I know I'm at risk for losing my job completely once I go to part time. But I don't feel it's right for my family to go back full time. With ds1 I was back full time in 6 weeks but he was healthy and wasn't a preemie. But it's been so different this time. I'm just at a loss on what to say and why I'm changing things in the middle of maternity leave. This is rambling I know but any thoughts? Advice? Insight? Cause I need it! I'm tired and worn down this maternity leave.

MommyAtty

I'm sorry you're going through this. Are you thinking about going back part-time temporarily or permanently? As a boss, I would give a good, reliable performer a lot of leeway in this situation if I knew it was temporary, like a couple of months. If it was a request for permanent change to temp status, that would be more difficult. Part of that is that my company just flat doesn't do temporary schedules for professionals and their support personnel. Part is that all the positions that report to me are really overloaded, so losing half a fte would be awful long term. Best of luck!! And you and your LOs are in my thoughts.

djm31012

You always need to do what is in the best interest of your family. At this point in time...it sounds like its best for you to be home at least part time until things settle. A few options...instead of going back part time, can you extend your maternity leave and take some unpaid time? At my company, i get 12 weeks paid and can take up to 12 additional weeks unpaid. So that would buy me another 3 months. If thats not an option...I think honesty is the best policy. Explain the difficulty of the situation...your need to be home part time with your DS for appointments, special care, etc. He cant be in daycare around other children so you need to be home with him. I bet they are sympathetic and try to work something out with you.  If they let you go or turn you down then so be it. Everyone can talk about career set backs, etc...none of that matters. Your family and children are most important.  If that winds up happening-you will always find another job when you are ready to get back in...even if you have to work your way up the ladder a bit then. Good luck to you!

SoMoNY

My first was born at 34 weeks because of combo of IUGR and pre-e so I know how stressful it can be.  IUGR and pre-e just happens, stress doesn't bring it on so don't think you caused it, kwim?

As for going PT are you taking a full leave?  If not what ever FMLA time you have left can be broken up to create 3 day work weeks with other 2 days falling under FMLA time.

If you have no time left I would talk to immediate boss and let him/her know how long this is for.  Like prior poster I would say yes to someone who needs to be PT for 3-6 months but anything longer than that wouldn't work.  They type of work/firm will dictate how flexible your boss is able to be.

*sparky*

I would just be honest, while trying not to make it too emotional.  I think your reasoning is completely understandable and it is in your company's best interest to try to work with you on a PT arrangement rather than have you not come back at all.  When you talk to him, I would be prepared to discuss a couple of options - as others said, is there any remaining FMLA you can use to come back gradually, or would you be open to coming back PT for a few months and then going FT again?

It helps if you know up front what you would be willing to do, so if your boss shoots down your first proposal you can suggest another option.  Also, think up front about how they will cover your work while you have a reduced schedule and that sort of thing.

When I was out on my first ML, I decided I wanted to change to a flex schedule so I just called my boss to talk to him about it.  He was completely open and agreed on the spot.  So don't be nervous - just tell them this is what you have to do and that you want to make it work and see what they say.

GL! 

skernan

I'm so sorry to hear that. Thingsust be so stressful for you right now? I agree with what has been said and your family should come first. Your boss should understand this. Have you ever considered your own business? I started mine as a Mary Kay consultant and absolutely love it! So many of us are able to quite our full time jobs and stay at home with our children. You can just work around your family's schedule.

kimmee1997

Thank you all for your replies. I did what many of you mentioned and tried to clarify what exactly I am wanting so I could convey it to my boss. I Am looking at a little longer term like six months or more and I know it's not fair to my coworkers and can put more of a stress on them. I work in nursing so part time is doable though. My job has some flexibility. So I talked to my boss. Told her it would be at least 6 months. That I would like to work 3 days a week and that I could see as many patients as needed. She asked what days and I told her it could be whatever is best for them but that I would prefer to work them all in a row. Anyways she was ok with that and that we will work the rest out as I go along. It's a huge relief having had that talk. Cause I knew I couldn't extend my
Maternity leave because I am not paid for my time off as I work without benefits. I have to work, at least part time. Because financially we could not afford for me to continue not working. Not to mention that for my sanity I at least have to work part time. I do not function well as a sahm. I don't manage myself well. I need the structure of work. As for my husband taking off, he does not want to. He would rather I do it. I feel much better having been upfront and letting my boss know. And she has been pretty flexible in the past with others and with me. So I am relieved that I still have a job! Thanks again for the replies! It really helped me to figure out what I wanted to say to her.

Klavanga74

I was about to chime in with advice, but it sounds like it all went really well!  Such tough decisions and being up front as quickly as you can is ALMOST always the best approach.  I'm grappling with letting one of my two businesses go, which means letting clients go, etc.  I love the flexibility and income potential of the business I would keep - it definitely surpasses the other one in those categories, but I built the first one up myself, and so it's hard to let go...I just don't think I can keep both, have an infant, and two kids!  Anyway, sounds like things have worked well for you!  Congrats!