Probably no simple solution but I'll try anyway

kcisthebombdotcom

So after school on mwf we go play at the y. It's a win/win for both kids as ds gets 90 extra minutes of unstructured playtime with school friends and dd gets to practice her social skills with nt peers. Dd has come a really long way--she used to mostly sit in the corner furthest from all the action with dolls alone and you'd occasionally get these glimpses of playing with peers but they generally tended to be short lived and with the older boys. Now she tends to be more in the action with other kids her age for a considerable amount of time playing basketball, Legos, trains and with the extra large building blocks. However, she still wants me to play with her a lot of the time and brings books to me or gets me to play puzzles or dress up with dolls. I'd rather her spend more time with the other kids and less time with me though I am grateful she is starting to consistently play with kids her own age. Is there any way I can encourage her to engage me less and spend more time with the other kids?

bumpuser511563

Is there any way you can step out of the room for the majority of the time?

kcisthebombdotcom

Sailor Saturn said:

Is there any way you can step out of the room for the majority of the time?

Technically yes but it's generally a busier time so I'd prefer not to.

MirandaHobbes

Why don't you want to leave her? I've been leaving DS since he was a baby. He loves the Y. But then, he isn't really hesistant around other kids. He might ignore them, but he will generally hang out around them. It's nice that you can be there to provide some scaffolding around play once in awhile, but I think you should try leaving her. You might be surprised. There have been times when I've been less than impressed by the quality of care, but in general we've been going to this Y for so many years that I know he is safe. There have been times I have felt guilty leaving DS, knowing that for him, unstructured play time usually means he's left to his own devices and may just completely ignore the other kids. But I'm always pleased to see him doing something with another kid. We've only had a couple hiccups where he was caught arguing with other kids or the staff. I think it makes him resilient to be able to get along wherever he is brought.

I'm looking at your ticker and seeing that your DD is only just barely 3, and I'm remembering DS did have a really rough seperation anxiety phase between 2-3 where we quit our gym for awhile because it was too hard.

kcisthebombdotcom

MirandaHobbes said:

Why don't you want to leave her? I've been leaving DS since he was a baby. He loves the Y. But then, he isn't really hesistant around other kids. He might ignore them, but he will generally hang out around them. It's nice that you can be there to provide some scaffolding around play once in awhile, but I think you should try leaving her. You might be surprised. There have been times when I've been less than impressed by the quality of care, but in general we've been going to this Y for so many years that I know he is safe. There have been times I have felt guilty leaving DS, knowing that for him, unstructured play time usually means he's left to his own devices and may just completely ignore the other kids. But I'm always pleased to see him doing something with another kid. We've only had a couple hiccups where he was caught arguing with other kids or the staff. I think it makes him resilient to be able to get along wherever he is brought.

I'm looking at your ticker and seeing that your DD is only just barely 3, and I'm remembering DS did have a really rough seperation anxiety phase between 2-3 where we quit our gym for awhile because it was too hard.

Oh I do separate from her there. She's been going there since she was 1.5 and does great. I just prefer at this specific time slot not to leave her because it is a busier time when the staff/child ratios are higher and I do want to give her some instruction.