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How to stay Positive so early on?

maggie713maggie713 member
in Pregnant after IF
Happy Friday!  This is my first post on the SAIF board (yay), but I'm not ready to introduce myself yet officially.  How do you stay positive, and get excited very early on?  I just received my very first BFP on Monday with a Beta of 2229, and 48 hours later 3375.  At just 5 weeks, we saw the gestational sac, but nothing else at that point.  My next u/s is on Wednesday.  I want to stay positive but in the back of my mind I'm constantly saying that aweful "M" word. I have no reason to think otherwise, but need positive reinforcement, or a Mantra!  Help!  Thank you! 

**** Ticker Warning ****

Me: 37, DH: 38 Married since 2005, TTC since 2007

IVF#1 February 2013 - 6R, 4M, 3F - transferred 2 day 3; 1 frozen - BFN

IVF#2 May 2013 - Menopur, Follistim, Ganirilex - 16R, 13M - freeze all eggs due to MFI 0% Motility day of retreival

FET September 2013 - 9 eggs thawed, 0 fertilized :( transferred frostie from IVF #1 - Estrace & PIO - BFN

**Change RE**

January 2014 - IVF #3 (Lucky #3?!)  ER 2/5/14 19R, 16M, 11F with PICSI.

2/10/14 Transferred 2 AA day 5 blasts <3<3, 5 Frozen - Estrace & Endometrim (which IMO is worse than PIO!!)

Beta 2/24/14 Beta #1: 2229, Beta #2: 3577 BFP!!

6 week u/s - TWO heartbeats <3

EDD 10/30/14

 

***** All Welcome *******

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Re: How to stay Positive so early on?

  • Allison7Allison7 member
    Today, you are pregnant. You have to stay focused on that. My RE wouldn't even do a u/s before 6 weeks because they often don't show more than the gestational sac, but even at 6w2d they cautioned us that we may or may not see the heartbeat and that if we didn't see it, it still wasn't the end. 

    I know it is hard to stay positive so early on, but just keep telling yourself that today you are pregnant and try to enjoy each day you are pregnant. 
    TTC Since January 2012 Me:37 DH:34      DX July 2013: Unexplained Infertility      New DX Dec 2013: DOR
    BFP#1 6/4/12 EDD 2/13/13 M/C 6/6/12  BFP#2 2/21/13 EDD 11/3/13 M/C 2/26/13 BFP#3 C/P
    4 rounds of clomid, 2 with IUI = BFN
    November/December Retesting/Natural Cycle = Surprise BFP @ 11dpo! Beta#1 76.6@13dpo Beta #2 276@15dpo u/s#1 6w2d hb113 u/s#2 8w2d, measuring 8w4d hb168! 10w2d hb171 12w3d Verifi results are in and good! EDD 8/23 Our Baby Girl Rainbow Baby born 8/20/2014!!!
    Um...what? BFP 11/2/15!?! EDD 7/4/16
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  • MJC1116MJC1116 member
    Agree with PPs that what is reality today should be your focus. I was a nervous wreck for a long time, but hitting certain milestones allowed me to relax a bit more each time. Congrats!
    DH & I: 29
    TTC #1 4/2009 -  DD 2/5/10
    TTC #2 since October 2011
    2IF issues
    7/2013 - IUI #1: 50 units Follistim +  Ovidrel  = BFN
    8/2013 - IUI #2: 50 units Follistim +  Ovidrel  = BFP! Beta #1 (12 dpiui) 8/21: 45  Beta #2 (16 dpiui) 8/26: 301 Beta #3 (21 dpiui) 8/30: 1,929. 1st Ultrasound 9/4 - One perfect sac. 2nd Ultrasound 9/13 - Heartbeat at 124 bpm! Anniversary  

    image


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • JMForte33JMForte33 member
    edited February 2014
    I know exactly how you feel! I am a little over 7 weeks and i am pretty much living appointment to appointment. I was just telling DH today that I need my first ultrasound on monday to come now so my brain can feel better!
    While it can be hard, focusing on the positive absolutely helps and just knowing that with every week and every milestone you will start to feel better.
    All the best :)

              --II-------- >  Siggy Warning < --------II--
    Info:
    Me: 28  DH: 26
    TTC Since Sept '12
    10/2013: FirstRE appt.
    HSG and bloodwork normal;SA normal
    Dx: A-Typical PCOS  /  MTHFR folic acid gene mutation
    Treatments: Gonal-F Pen Injections
    11/22/13 - Ovidrel Trigger
    11/24/13 - IUI #1 -- BFN
    12/18/13 - Ovidrel Trigger
    12/20/13 - IUI #2 -- BFN 
    1/23/14  - IVF #1 Transfer
    2/3/14   - BFP! Beta #1 = 508
    2/5/14   - Beta #2 = 1193
    3/3/14   - 1st Ultrasound- 1 Bean, HR 171 bpm 
    4/3/14   - OB Ultrasound & Appointmnt

                   *~*~~ All Welcome ~~*~*
    AnniversaryPregnancy Ticker
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  • Jeffreysmom24Jeffreysmom24 member
    JMForte33 said:

    I know exactly how you feel! I am a little over 7 weeks and i am pretty much living appointment to appointment. I was just telling DH today that I need my first ultrasound on monday to come now so my brain can feel better!

    While it can be hard, focusing on the positive absolutely helps and just knowing that with every week and every milestone you will start to feel better.
    All the best :)
    This is how I am too - I live appt to appt and so far, my RE has seen me every week but is going to release me next week. It is going to be so hard! I am glad that you posted this because I could use the advice too! Good luck to you!
    Report Reply
  • chucktgirlchucktgirl member
    Maggie, hang in there! My first U/S was at 5w1d. I also showed sac but no fetal pole. I was devastated. I was *sure* it was over. Next U/S - everything was perfect with a strong heartbeat! Congratulations on your pregnancy!

    imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage
    My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.

    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
    Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins    .
    First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12
    First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
    IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right  & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
    ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
    IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13
    ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
    IVF #3:     NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
    ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0.  Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN
    IVF #4:     (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
    ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
    ***Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...
    IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
    BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
    2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
    2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
    2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
    IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
    5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
    6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
    7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
    EDD 3/18/15!

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  • maggie713maggie713 member
    Thank you all!! Repeating, I am Pregnant, I am Pregnant.... :)

    **** Ticker Warning ****

    Me: 37, DH: 38 Married since 2005, TTC since 2007

    IVF#1 February 2013 - 6R, 4M, 3F - transferred 2 day 3; 1 frozen - BFN

    IVF#2 May 2013 - Menopur, Follistim, Ganirilex - 16R, 13M - freeze all eggs due to MFI 0% Motility day of retreival

    FET September 2013 - 9 eggs thawed, 0 fertilized :( transferred frostie from IVF #1 - Estrace & PIO - BFN

    **Change RE**

    January 2014 - IVF #3 (Lucky #3?!)  ER 2/5/14 19R, 16M, 11F with PICSI.

    2/10/14 Transferred 2 AA day 5 blasts <3<3, 5 Frozen - Estrace & Endometrim (which IMO is worse than PIO!!)

    Beta 2/24/14 Beta #1: 2229, Beta #2: 3577 BFP!!

    6 week u/s - TWO heartbeats <3

    EDD 10/30/14

     

    ***** All Welcome *******

    Report Reply
  • YlvelillYlvelill member
    Yeah I don't think I will ever stop worrying. 18w now I am I still convinced half the time that something is gonna go wrong even though I have seen the babies this week and everything is fine :)

    Just try to stay calm and as someone else said "today I am pregnant". I usually add "and I will believe that until proven otherwise". It helps some!
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  • anationsanations member
    Hang in there. I don't think there is anyway to completely take away those feelings. Be thankful for everyday. Chose hope over fear when you can and don't be hard on yourself for being doubtful. It is understandable. Fingers crossed for you.

     

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  • HeatherHam10HeatherHam10 member
    Like the other girls have said just try to remind yourself you are pregnant. I worried severely the first tri but it did start to get a little better by 10ish weeks. You should be hearing the hb soon and I got a sonoline doppler for home which helped a ton. Time really does go by fast.
    image



    Me 28 DH 30

    After 4+ years TTC

    FET #2 = DS Madden Jeffery <3 July 29, 2014 <3
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