Cousin lost her baby

Athenanolen

I don't understand. My cousin who 22 lost her baby last night. She was 19 weeks. I still don't understand how this happens at this stage. I don't know who to talk to about this since DH is still in India and I know he will be worried sick about me if I tell him this.

AnotherPreggo

How awful.  Your poor cousin   I can't imagine the devastation.

Posting this on here probably isn't the best idea though.  Plenty of mamas are already worried.

jensavicci

I'm so sorry for her

LuluPMW

That's so devastating for your cousin. I think it is uncommon enough at this stage that it is not worth worrying overmuch about it.

@anotherpreggo - I think loss is a reality and as long as the poster considerately mentions it in the title then it's a valid discussion topic.

Ylvelill

I agree, if mentioned in title people can choose not to read.

I am sorry to hear about your cousin, it is freighting to think things can go bad. I keep my fingers and toes crossed every day for that reason

One of my close friends lost his baby last summer at 37w due to bad blood flow that had not been picked up on during the u/s. And they had an otherwise perfectly normal pregnancy as far as they knew.

Jennik30

I'm so sorry for your cousin.

mcvgal

I am so sorry for your cousin.

email2ash

So sad to hear this!

My friend lost her baby yesterday at 39 weeks and has been in the hospital now waiting to go into labor. I can't even imagine.

acciovino

I'm so sorry for your cousin's loss. That is heartbreaking.

And @email2ash I am sorry for your friend. I can't even imagine

allardr

My SIL lost her baby a few months ago at 18 weeks. The sad part is even being that far along she got so few answers as to why. 

So sorry for her. Try to not to project it onto your pregnancy though. Stress is never good.

email2ash

Caitlinrj said:

I'm so sorry for your cousin's loss. That is heartbreaking.

And @email2ash I am sorry for your friend. I can't even imagine

I feel so sick inside when I hear these ... Just pray for us all to have happy, healthy babies!

kmawb

So sorry for her. 

Maybe you could direct her to the Loss board here on TB when she feels she's ready, I've heard it is an excellent place for support from other ladies who have gone through something similar.

hupp0013

I'm so sorry for your cousin's loss.

ksuRN09

I'm so sorry for your cousin. I can't imagine how hard this is for her and her SO.

Carly198330

So sorry to hear your cousin is going through this. How sad xx

alygoo615

knowing it could be the last.

I'm so sorry for your friend's loss. It is so insanely rare. Please don't worry yourself unnecessarily.

starlight0412

So sorry for your cousins loss. I loss at any stage can be devasting.

rattlecanqueen

I'm so sorry for their losses.

reils500

So sorry for your cousin's loss.

TurtleMonsters

How could this even be suggested? This is the place to come and discuss things like this. We're all aware that loss happens. We don't live in caves. We're big girls here.

AnotherPreggo said:

How awful.  Your poor cousin   I can't imagine the devastation.

Posting this on here probably isn't the best idea though.  Plenty of mamas are already worried.

I thought 24 weeks was the magic number for them safely living outside of us, but it's only a week different then the pp that mentioned 25 weeks.
I'm really sorry that happened. That has to be SO very hard. I hope you feel OK about your pregnancy, don't worry that this will happen to you.

There are likely google statistics out there for chance of loss at a particular time. I know mom's who are in their week 20's, thankful for every week they continue to keep baby in (preeclampsia). It's less likely, in a healthy pregnancy that things will go wrong, but we're not out of the water until  babies are born...and even then, they are pretty vulnerable.

I'd also never be afraid to vent or come here for support on topics like this. Your post was perfectly appropriate.

Prncesta

I am so sorry and sad for your cousins loss. My prayers are with her.

Shelleybell

so sorry for your cousin

Jillybean100

I'm so sorry for your cousin. And also for the other posters who have friends and family members who have experienced this or have gone through this themselves. How heartbreaking. I agree with the PPs and try not to let this stress me out and try to take comfort that the odds of later term losses are low. 

AmericanInOz

I'm so sorry for your cousin's loss My sister lost a baby at 20 weeks, it's just devastating. She did go on a year later to have a healthy son though. But gosh, I can't imagine how tough that would be

TRS48

Im so sorry for your cousin and everyone else mentioned here, so sad.  

BoraBoraBaby

My heart breaks for her. Please let her know she has support here if she needs it.

juliepenewitt

My thoughts and prayers are with your cousin and with any mother who is going through/has had to go through anything like this. It breaks my heart.

brooklynesque

I am so sorry about your cousin's baby.  It must be devastating.

drunkenhandstand

OP, I'm so sorry. That's just terrible

marsalisails

As PPs have said, I too am so sorry for her loss. It is truly heartbreaking. The loss board, as well as TTCAL board (when she's ready) are great sources of support.

Athenanolen

Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts and words. My family is very close so she has lots of support, thank goodness. And I am so sorry to hear of those of you with friends,family members, or pp that have personally gone through a loss. I am so thankful every day and I now know how much more thankful I should be.

cakebatter27

I think it's fine to post this here. It's a harsh reality we know can happen and pray it doesn't. I'm sorry for your family's loss.

As someone said about June 14...Their board has suffered SO many losses. I lurk on all the BMBs and theirs breaks my heart.

shanaynerz

I'm sorry she's going through this. I had a loss @ 22w3d. It's awful and I hope she can get some peace and take time to grieve.

SweetTamale38

Nothing I can really add will help ease your mind...as there have already been some great responses.  I just want to give my condolences and prayers for your cousin and all of the family.  I'm so very sorry for her loss.  Please take care.

fmb2011

My prayers go out to your cousin! It's so tough going through a loss. I also had a friend who lost her baby at about 26 weeks. He was strangled by the umbilical cord which is very uncommon.

jalicenixon

I can't imagine how hard that must be. A number of my friends have shared later term losses including the experience of a still birth at term. It scared me but it also reminded me that nothing is certain & life is unpredictable. I am just grateful as of today this pregnancy is going well.
If something were to happen I would have to rely on the idea that there is a bigger picture that I can't see right now. When I had a miscarriage in march I was crushed & had to grieve but eventually had to move forward and in our case try again...I'm sorry for your cousins loss. I hope she is able to see a way forward.