ADHD - too early to tell?

FutureKAH

This may be completely premature but I'm concerned my DS1, who will be 4 next month, might display signs of ADHD however everything I read indicates it's much too early to know and that much of his behavior is normal for this age group.  I get that but in all honesty I am near tears on a daily basis trying to turn his energy down and try to get him to focus on one thing for more than a minute.  Is that normal to feel that way?  He never. stops. moving.  Or talking.  He's excited all the time which makes him loud. So very loud.  His Preschool evaluation from the first half of the year went along the lines of that he is excellent on the playground and can use all the equipment properly but that when it comes time to do work at the desk (like tracing letters) he has to be constantly reminded of what he's doing because he can't seem to focus.  I experience this at home too when I make him work in his workbook.  He doesn't let me instruct him or show him how to do something and if he does I feel he is only half listening and then wants to move on to something else.  When we read stories in bed at night it's impossible for him to sit still and just listen.  He's often just playing with another toy or interrupting me to talk about something.  He never ever seems tired at bedtime and it's a battle to get him to stay in his bed.  8pm is bedtime which I don't think is early but maybe I'm wrong.  He won't stay in his seat at mealtimes.  Always jumping up to run around or just needing to stand next to his chair rather than sit or stand or kneel on the chair.  We tried to put together an alphabet puzzle last week and it was chaotic to say the least and was probably top five of my least favorite parenting moments.  He's a good little boy, a bit mischievous, very bright, very sweet and I have no other concerns for him.  Like I said I know it's early and this is age appropriate behavior but I see him with other kids his age who can speak in "inside voices" and not constantly have to be moving and running around like a chicken with it's head cut off you start to wonder.   

So my real question to those of you with kids who have ADHD diagnosis were there any red flags at this age that might stick out?  What age does all this really become concerning? Maybe I'm overreacting but my husband is really the one who keeps bringing this up to me and I keep telling him it's much to early to know so I thought I'd seek out some early advice.  We're both just getting incredibly frustrated which is not good for anyone involved. TIA. 

MirandaHobbes

There are many ladies who are experts on ADHD (and I'm not one of them) so take my input with a grain of salt. My son was diagnosed ASD when he was 3 (2 by the school district). Some of your son's behaviors are exactly what my son does. Not being able to control the volume of your voice is a common autism trait. My son is permanently on "loud" and we're constantly telling him to lower his voice. He also cannot sit still and "forgets" to stay seated at the dinner time several times a night. He hops, prances and skips around the house, never walks. He walks on his tiptoes. These are all sensory delays, his body needs the feedback. From what I understand, ADHD trends similarly for some kids. I gave up on crafts and games from about 3ys to 5 yrs because it was just impossible. He wouldn't concentrate, and just didn't seem to care. He's starting to mature a little in this area now, but I usually have to bribe him (e.g. you can have the Ipad back after we play 3 games or 3 puzzles). 8 pm seems to be a pretty "normal" bedtime, DS is asleep by 730 each night but he is the opposite- a heavy sleeper who needs at least 10 hours a night.

 

MirandaHobbes

Woops, meant to add- I don't think 4 is necessarily too young to be checked out. DS was diagnosed ASD before his third birthday, and at the time is presentation was pretty subtle (it was extremely subtle when the school district diagnosed him at 20 months, but that isn't an "official" medical diagnosis)

light52

Many doctors will say not to diagnosis before kindergarten but our oldest was diagnosed at 4 1/2.  We fought medication but after a few years of therapy and all therapists saying they reached their max until he could focus a bit more, we went that route.  He has pretty severe ADHD and we just got the ASD diagnosis last fall.

My middle child is showing signs of ADHD and we go back and forth daily on getting it diagnosed.  He is 4 1/2.  However, many of his behaviors relate to his older brother so it is hard to tell what is him and what is mimicking.  With him, we are currently waiting to see how he does in kindergarten. 

My best advice is to trust your gut.  If you feel the need for a diagnosis now then seek help.  You can always come back later and do it again if the results do not seem right or he is too young to tell.

lemen99

My son's attention is very poor and all of his teachers and therapists bring it up.  He also has sensory issues though!  He turned 5 in December.  His developmental pedi doesn't want to diagnose him yet, not until he sees how Kindergarten goes in the fall. I'm not sure that he doesn't diagnose sooner or not, but in our case, he wants to wait.

Princess_Lily

For us, DS was 2.5yo when his inattentiveness presented itself. He didn't want to be joined to group activities unless he found them interesting in preschool. We have a 0 tolerance preschool area...so it was hard for him to remain in the private preschools - there are no public preschools in the area.

We are in a DX eval process currently, but inattentiveness is there. He wants to flip/climb on the couch, unless prompted to remain focused, he wont remain on one leaening activity for more that 5min. However he can keep his attention on visual learning activities.

Children can be dx'd early if their behaviors are causing too much disruption to remain in school. Now as far as medication, they do not medicate unless the child is 6yo+ or the behaviors are causing safety issues.

In our case, his patience and focus has greatly improved with age. Just keep pushing focus, but don't be hard on them about it, or it backfires.

FutureKAH

Thank you everyone for your feedback.   I really appreciate it.  I never considered anything on the autism spectrum and I don't feel that's the case but what do I know.  I'm also not sure I completely understand all this sensory stuff but that is something I can ask the pedi about in March.

@bubba2b his language is really good.  He speaks clearly and has always had a lot of words.  It's easy to have a conversation with him

I guess I should check in with his teachers at school and see what they have to say about how he is in school.  I pick him up everyday at the same time which happens to be story time and he's always sitting quietly in the circle.  Then I'll mention my concerns and his schools comments to the pedi at his 4 year appt in March.  

Thanks again everyone!