Shower

lhgd1989

DS is 20 months and DD is 7 weeks. I wanted to take a quick shower this morning and leave the two kids with DH in the living room. Instead of being ok with it like I thought he would be he told me that I should wait until both kids are asleep later ( even though they hardly ever nap at the same time). He said DD will just cry with him when I leave so I shouldn't shower. He says she is never calm with him but I feel like sometimes he doesn't try very hard to calm her down. So frustrating.

jf198400

Sounds like he needs some time to adjust with DD, which of course means you should take all the showers you want. He has to be a Dad and learn how to cope. The harder thing will be when he's not home and you need to shower. I generally showered at night after kids were asleep, until my LO was on a consistent schedule. Then I woke up before the kids and showered in the morning.

ebp913

My second (DS) was and is super difficult.  My husband had a really hard time dealing with him and it was hard on me.  I would start forcing your DH to deal with DD so that you get a break and he learns what works for him, etc.  My son is 1 tomorrow and he still really has a vast preference for me over my husband and it's super annoying even though DH has done a lot more in recent months.  I'd sit down with him and say that he needs to work on his approach with your DD and even start leaving them alone.  Take your oldest out for an hour and let DH handle the baby.  

krazyinsane

My DH is similar. He just isn't comfortable with little babies because he knows that they really do just want me. I started showering with the little one in the shower with me. She was on a ramp like bath seat similar to this. Now at 9 months she LOVES the shower and I can let the two big girls watch a movie or nap while I get a shower so I'm not leaving family time so I can shower. Not the best of options but better than the stinky alternative

jesselayne8

When my second was under 5 months. I put in the bouncy seat in the bathroom so he could see me while I showered.

ashiscute

I think I would have taken an hour long shower if my DH said that to me.  I would not take the baby into the shower with me.  That is really my only opportunity for alone time.  The only way he is going to be able to soothe your LO is if he makes an effort every day without you around.