Thoughts? Disturbing content — The Bump
LGBT Parenting

Thoughts? Disturbing content

I have become increasingly concerned with the state the world has succumb to. I have been up,since 5 and it is now 3, in that time frame I have heard of 3 kids who have tried to take their own lives because of bullying in which 2 were successful. The 8yr old was bullied for liking My little Pony, he now has severe brain damage. Thankfully in a short time period strangers came together and raised over $68000 to help with cost of treat,ent. Another child was bullied for being the new kid and the other was a high school girl ( in my school district) there was also two children abductedfby their father, a young boy shot dead by his 14 yr old brother and an infant that "went missing" I feel like I could be setting my potential child up for the same ridicule these children have endured because the/she would have 2 moms. My child would not be asking for it but it would be other children whose parents are not telling them it is not ok. Children are not born this way, they are taught. I feel torn about whether I should try to continue to TTC. Has anyone else 2nd guess based on the world we live in or a. I just feeling overloaded by the amount of tragedy in such a. Short time frame?
              Me: 34. DW: 35 
            Together 12 years- celebrating 8 years legally married on Feb 9th 2014! 
 TTC #1 using at home insemination 
 Started in Oct 2011 on and off for a year; consistently for the past year 
 Soy Isoflavones used last 3 cycles 
 Using a healthy, fertile friend as a donor 

 We have 5 fur babies we call kids ( 3 dogs & 2 cats) and 6 chickens. I am trying to add a tea cup pig to our family as well but my DW is afraid I will think it looks lonely sleeping elsewhere and invite it into our bed which already has 3 dogs. Trying to Conceive Ticker

Re: Thoughts? Disturbing content

  • I. Had custody of one of my former students for 9 years and no first hand the effects bullying has on a kid. Not on,y did he have two lesbian guardians he was also questioning his own identity. At the time he was 12. He made many attempts/threats at taking his life or hurting himself and spent a lot of time in hospitals. The best advice I have ever been give about bullying came from a 7 year old. We had a discussion about it and he looked at me and said "don't say anything back to them. If you don't talk back to the other person they will get bored and leave you alone because it's not fun anymore" I tried to get my "son" to understand that as long as he continued to react they would continue to taunt him. You are right, as parents we can try to do everything to protect our children and teach them how to handle situations , the hard part is hoping they make the right choice.
                  Me: 34. DW: 35 
                Together 12 years- celebrating 8 years legally married on Feb 9th 2014! 
     TTC #1 using at home insemination 
     Started in Oct 2011 on and off for a year; consistently for the past year 
     Soy Isoflavones used last 3 cycles 
     Using a healthy, fertile friend as a donor 

     We have 5 fur babies we call kids ( 3 dogs & 2 cats) and 6 chickens. I am trying to add a tea cup pig to our family as well but my DW is afraid I will think it looks lonely sleeping elsewhere and invite it into our bed which already has 3 dogs. Trying to Conceive Ticker
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  • I can't even watch the news anymore. I live in CT and after the Newtown tragedy I am terrified of public open spaces. It's such a high anxiety world to those of us who are sensitive to these kinds of things.

    Me-33 DW-29
    together since 2009
    Married since 6/14/13 
    1st IUI (clomid+ovidrel) 10/14/13... BFP 10/26/13...                                                         
    EDD 7/1/14 ...MMC 11/22/13...D&C 11/25/13
                                                   
    2nd IUI (clomid+ovidrel) 1/15/14...BFN 
             
    3rd IUI (unmedicated) 2/12/14...BFN
    4th IUI (clomid + ovidrel) 3/10/14...BFN
    home ICI (unmedicated) 4/4/14...BFN
    home ICI (unmedicated) 5/2 & 5/3...BFN
    5th & 6th IUI (clomid + ovidrel) 5/28 & 5/29...BFN
    7th & 8th IUI (follistim & ovidrel) 6/24 & 6/25....BFN
                     
    **all are welcome**

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  • My second embryo transfer was shortly after the Boston Marathon bombing.  I was about a mile from the bombing when it happened, and I live about 3 miles from where they were looking for the second suspect, so it all felt very close and real to me.  We were on lockdown in our house all day, and all I could think of was "Should I be bringing a kid into this world?"

    I have an anxiety disorder and this is the sort of thing I can obsess about if I'm not careful.  I try to remember that the world has always had bad things happening -- plagues, famine, religious persecution, slavery -- and we have always brought children into it anyway.  At the same time there have always been good things, and there always will be.  Most of us have had negative experiences in our lives, but most of us do not wish we were never born.  Violence may seem to be increasing, but the majority of people are NOT violent or dangerous.  I like to think I am adding one more good person to the world and tipping the balance a bit.
    Married my wife 8/2007 ~ TTC #1 since 7/2011
    9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
    IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
    ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
    FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
    Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
    FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
    EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
    *Everyone welcome*

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  • Thanks for the insight...I live in ma and it seems we constantly here of schools in the area going into lockdown and recently had a reverse 911 telling us of a suspicious male hanging out in the area of school bus stops. Unfortunaltey yet thankfully schools and parents are preparing children for these types of emergency situations. After a long draining day yesterday it really got to me last night. My wife kept trying to reassure me that by good people bringing babies into this world will just lead to a reborn population with high morals and values and hopefully a good head on their shoulders. We are diverse society with different beliefs and opinions if we could just learn how to deal with it in a way that doesn't make a child want to take their own life.
                  Me: 34. DW: 35 
                Together 12 years- celebrating 8 years legally married on Feb 9th 2014! 
     TTC #1 using at home insemination 
     Started in Oct 2011 on and off for a year; consistently for the past year 
     Soy Isoflavones used last 3 cycles 
     Using a healthy, fertile friend as a donor 

     We have 5 fur babies we call kids ( 3 dogs & 2 cats) and 6 chickens. I am trying to add a tea cup pig to our family as well but my DW is afraid I will think it looks lonely sleeping elsewhere and invite it into our bed which already has 3 dogs. Trying to Conceive Ticker
  • DW and I talk about this all the time. There will always be bad things happening in this world and there has always been. People had to go through the great depression; people had to go through slavery...etc. What is different now is that we have social media and tv to put these kinds of stories as front page news and spread like wildfire. I am not, in any way, making light of any of the tragic events that have happened, I just wanted to bring some perspective. If a person can post a picture of themselves searching for a parent or sibling and it gets shared 1,000,000 times, just think of how quickly factual bad news is spreading. 

    We always say this: We do want to bring a kid into this world, and it is our job make them see and be the good in it. Teach your kid to be a strong, independent child who will stand their ground to bullying or ridicule. Talk to your kids. So many parents are too busy with everything else and they won't bother to be involved with their kids. That can't happen anymore. Not in this world! 

    TTC our first. Married to, and madly in love with, my beautiful wife. Living with our fur baby and enjoying 19 nieces and nephews. 
    • DW and I have been tracking, preparing, getting medical testing since January 2013.
    • First Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 08/02/13: BFN
    • Second Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 09/11/13, 09/13/13, 09/15/13: BFN
    • Third Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm: 10/13/13, 10/15/13, 10/17/13, 10/21/13: BFN
    • January 2014: Sonohysterogram shows excellent lining & tubes have no blockages
    • Fourth Cycle:  Monitored clomid cycle  w/ ICI's at home: 1/24/14 and 1/25/14. Ovulation verified:  BFN
    • Fifth Cycle: 02/2014 Femara 5mg with ovidrel trigger CD14: BFN
    • Taking a few months off to evaluate if we want to keep trying


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