XP 3T: So in a Dilemma

Sunni01

I know I haven't started a discussion in a long time. Really I looked back and said, dang it's been that long. So here I go. Well I think I am at a cross roads. I have given myself 5 IUI's to achieve my dream of a rainbow baby. Little did I know that I would get pregnant 3 out of the 4 times and miscarry. This fifth one coming up has me having so many mixed emotions, that I don't know what to do or where to go. This is the most confused that I have ever been in my life. I usually come here, but thought that I can handle this this time. I can't. I do need you ladies. I am afraid/ scared. I know I am not ready for ivf, emotionally and I have not looked into it financially. Thanks for reading.

ksgsmu

I am so sorry for your losses.  You have been through so much.  It sounds like you are exhausted in every way.  (( Hugs))


 I have no real advice just know we are here to listen. 

PrivateOne

This journey is so hard and so full of many emotions.  The decision making process is brutal, too.  I'm sorry you are going through this and wish it weren't so.  When you are ready, if you decide to do IVF you may find it brings you more answers.  As well with IVF you might be able to do PGD testing for even more answers.  I know its a hard decision to make, but know that you are strong and can handle it. You've been on such a long journey already and are still standing. Be proud of yourself for that. Most people have no idea the inner strength all this takes.  I wish you nothing but the best wherever you path goes. 

Davie813

I'm sorry you're in such a tough place right now.  If IVF #5 is already scheduled for the near future, I really hope this is it for you!  If you're trying to decide how to proceed, I hope you can come up with a plan of action that gives you some much-needed peace of mind.

I agree with PP that you should give yourself credit for how strong you are, and have been, and will be able to continue to be.  I wish you the very best--you're in all of our thoughts!

shannonm97

I see in your isggy that you are unexplained for the m/c.  IVF should give you more answers about egg quality and let you transfer the best blasts. It's a huge step if you aren't ready though.  Good luck in your decision. 

Samuelismomma

Sorry for your losses:( this is a tough journey and you have been tremendously strong. Don't be hard on yourself. Maybe you need to just take a month or two to get your mind around things and decide what is right for you...good luck and we are here to listen!

BeckyP005

Sending you some big hugs and sorry for all your losses

hooligans4

Just wanted to offer (((hugs)))) to you. I hope you can get yourself in a good place to make the decisions you need to make about your ttc future.

KirstenAlecia

Im sorry about your losses. I can't imagine what you and some other ladies of through on this journey, I just know it must be hard and you must be strong. Praying you find some guidance in this. 

mindaa

So sorry for your losses. Praying for strength and hope through the 5th - that you will be able to stay focused on anticipating success in the present, and release the fear and stress of future decisions. 

Sunni01

Thank you everyone. I am still at a crossroads but I am trying just going to get through this tww. I have to believe that I was put on this journey for a reason, and that I will soon come out of it with an answer. Again, I thank you all.