Personalities. (? For moms with 2+ )

Read247

My question is for all you moms with 2+ kids is: if your first was really active, was your second really laid back?? I've heard that first and second born can be total opposites. Have any of you found that to be true? What are your kids like?

rainbowdashh

I don't have two yet, but I was just talking to my mom about this. My daughter is high energy and demanding and I was freaking out about having two like that. She said that I was more like my daughter and my sister was very laid back. She still is that way. So I'm hoping it's true, haha.

Mztwilson

All my kids were laid back at first. My oldest is high maintenance now my middle is laid back and my third is laid back.

owlcup

My two are pretty opposite. My DD is a wild child (like I was) and DS is way more laid back. He is starting to show a wild side though. He's still much more relaxed than DD is even with his "crazy."

I'm definitely terrified of having another girl. I don't want a DD repeat. She's a lot of work and energy!

ETA: I would also like to add that DD is not a bad child by any means just that she needs tons of activities and constant stimulation to be satisfied. She only spends a few hours a day in a "relaxed" mode. Unless she naps then its go, go, go all day long.

Read247

My DS is VERY active and demanding. He didn't STTN until he was a year old. I had my "oh shit" moment last night at the thought of another year without sleep. I know there's no rule... I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping! Hahaha.

rainbowdashh

Read247 said:

My DS is VERY active and demanding. He didn't STTN until he was a year old. I had my "oh shit" moment last night at the thought of another year without sleep. I know there's no rule... I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping! Hahaha.

I feel you. The sleep is what really has me worried. My daughter started sleeping through the night at 16 months. It was a looooong 16 months with little sleep. Even thinking of that happening again makes me tired.

owlcup

ohyealovely said:

Read247 said:

My DS is VERY active and demanding. He didn't STTN until he was a year old. I had my "oh shit" moment last night at the thought of another year without sleep. I know there's no rule... I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping! Hahaha.

I feel you. The sleep is what really has me worried. My daughter started sleeping through the night at 16 months. It was a looooong 16 months with little sleep. Even thinking of that happening again makes me tired.

Oh yes. All this too. My DD didn't start STTN until 18 months -2. It was hit or miss for a long time.

She still also bedshares with DH and myself for most of the night. Start off in her bed then sneak into ours.

DS haaaates sleeping with anyone but himself. :P

Read247

ohyealovely said:

Read247 said:

My DS is VERY active and demanding. He didn't STTN until he was a year old. I had my "oh shit" moment last night at the thought of another year without sleep. I know there's no rule... I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping! Hahaha.

I feel you. The sleep is what really has me worried. My daughter started sleeping through the night at 16 months. It was a looooong 16 months with little sleep. Even thinking of that happening again makes me tired.

Yeah. The first time it sucked but it was doable. I napped when he napped. I can't do that now! I have a toddler to chase!! I'll cross my fingers for you too @ohyeahlovely.

Lynnja616

DS was a fairly high maintenance baby, but a great sleeper (STTN at 6 weeks old).

DD was the most laid back, chill baby- but didn't STTN until 6 months old.

As toddlers, DS was super sweet and really mild mannered.  My DD is strong willed, independent- basically my sassy little spitfire. 

So yes- they have been pretty different!  They are both super bright and inquisitive, and talkative- both have always been snugglers, and they are both funny though in their own unique ways.  DD is definitely more fearless, while DS is cautious. 

rainbowdashh

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you too, @Read247!

becomingmommyagain

DS#1 is a control freak.  He always had to do everything his way.  He was a seeker of knowledge early on.  He always wanted to be over your shoulder while you were doing something.  He always had very strong opinions on how to do things better too.  He wanted his siblings to be around him, and to watch him play with his things, but not to play with him.  Now, he's 17 and is still the same way.  You can't tell him anything - he likes to figure things out on his own.  He's an observer and then will replicate and tweek it to make it his own.  He's had his license for a year and has owned 11 cars.  He buys them, takes them apart, fixes them, paints them, and sells them. 

DD - Is very laid back.  She's content to have others do things for her (which was great compliment to her brother's sytle).  She's was more likely to be found curled up on the couch watching tv or leaning over watching her brother.  She was always proud of the cool things he was doing and content to revel in his glory.  She's now 15 and still pretty laid back.  She's comfortable with herself, not demanding of the spotlight, and very supportive of her brothers.  You can find her in her room painting or journaling.  She's very modest of her own achievements. 

DS#2 - He's the giver.  He avoided conflict as much as possible.  If his protests were met with conflict he'd sacrifice himself to make the problem go away.  If he felt DS#1 was being mean to DD, he'd side with her and they'd go start a new game.  As he got older he was less likely to take crap from his brother and more likely to go find a new activity that he could be an active participant in.  But his loyalty to his sister never faltered.  He's now 14 and still has a close relationship with his sister - sometimes its love/hate - but when bored they frequently will do things together.  He's also a pretty modest kid when it comes to his achievements.  He embarrasses easily and tries to avoid the spotlight, but he's a hard worker academically and athletically and finds himself being recognized publicly frequently.

ncbelle

I wouldn't describe mine as exactly laid back vs. super active but yes, they are different personalities and were even as newborns!

erind228

Mine were completely different, and still are.

DD, was very needy as a baby.  She refused to sleep on her own.(still sleeps with us most of the night)

DS, really laid back.  I wouldn't say "easy", but a lot easier than my DD. 

They are still really different.  DS is still really laid back, and my DD is more independent and "sassy" as pp mentioned.  She is really strong willed.  DS, more go with the flow type of guy.  It is funny how they can be so different.

coffee-saur

My two were totally different even in utero (sp?).  DS kicked and moved like crazy and was a terrible nurser.  So bad we gave up after 2 months.  He is my active little monkey and total mess maker, and can be the most frustrating but tons of fun too.  

DD moved some but not near as much, latched on at the hospital and was a breeze with nursing from there.  She tries to keep up with big brother but is way sooner the one to clean up, sit and read a book and my 'Sensitive Susie'.  She tends to get offended over smaller things WAY sooner but then is still a little cuddle bug!  

Good luck!  As unhelpful as this sounds, my mom says its amazing how well you can function with so little sleep.

EmbracingChange

L was an easy baby, but demanding. When she screamed, you moved your ass. It was so loud! She slept through the night as soon as I listened to my doctor and stopped changing her at night. She was curious. She never crawled. She went straight from tummy time to pulling up on the couch. She walked by 9 months, climbed couches at 10(using our German Shepherd as a stool). She's a constant mover and has tons of ideas. She's smart as can be, very independent, and still wants things done as soon as she says so. Her head looks like its about to explode when she's told that she has to wait. She never has a bit of trouble in school. She is easy going, bit I have heard of her throwing mdown once when a boy was bullying her. I was proud.

R was a super easy baby. He was so big and so quiet. He slept 19 of 24 hours in the first two months. He was so quiet that when he was hungry he sounded like a mewing kitten.  He rolled over at 3 weeks old, never had trouble holding his head up, crawled at 5 months, and walked at 10months. When the was 2 we took him to an ENT and they said that he was only hearing 15% of sounds because of the ear infections. He's allergic to cow milk, soy, eggs, wheat, maple pollen, tree mold, and cats and his allergies cause the ear infections. He's now behind socially and emotionally and is in speech therapy. He's perfect at home. Laid back, plays well with his sister, and is really good at problem solving. At school he's a BeBe's kid. He can't stand criticism, doesn't do well in his class, is extremely smart, but throws tantrums(and chairs apparently), and I'm always having to seek strategies for handling his school problems. I wish I could be a sahm sometimes so I could work with him instead.

hjl050308

My two are complete opposites. My oldest is laid back and rolls with everything. He slep great from the beginning, never climbed, listened, etc. Ds2, on the other hand, is a wild man. He was from the beginning, starting with his early arrival at almost 34 weeks. I love how different they are. I'm excited to see what this little guy will be like with two brothers who are polar opposites.

momof5sept18

My first LO was colic, wouldn't BF, super hyper and didn't sleep completely through the night until 13mos.

Second LO latched on at the hospital by himself, no problem, (until he got thrush and gave it to me), slept through the night at a week old, and is a lot less hyper.

My DS1 is still super hyper and dramatic, DS2 is really relaxed and chill and just goes with the flow. They have been and I'm sure always will be as opposite as day and night. So LO#3 is definitely going to be interesting in comparison!

KristaU831

i hope this one is just like her big sister. dd1 was easy… up until recently lol.

MissBHaven1024

DD#1 was very chill, very independent, quiet, STTN at 3 weeks. DD#2 was the complete opposite. Needy, vocal, always needed snuggles, always needed company. They are still very much like they were as babies. I'm interested to see what this little man is going to be like.

MollySm

I don't have 2 yet, but this one is so different from Lucia already.  Lucia was so calm in utero, never wiggling on ultrasounds.  She came out a calm baby and has turned into a calm child.  Viviana wiggles around like crazy in there, has never held still for an ultrasound, is hard to get on a doppler bc she always runs away, and in general just seems the complete opposite.  I am so excited but nervous to see how that's going to play out when she is on the outside!!

MrsAMB07

#1 was super easy, laid back, calm, and observer and analyzer before anything else, loves to cuddle

#2 was super active, high maintenance, impatient, act first think about it later, super independent

We were like first time parents again in a lot of ways because there was so much our first never put us through. He guaranteed we'd have a second, she made us really think hard about it, haha.

Their personalities were very clear and different from birth and the descriptions still suit them. People used to tell me that #2 would be so different than #1, and that scared me because we loved his personality so much that the opposite scared us. Sure enough, that's what we got, and though she's a lot more tiring, we adore her personality, too! Very curious to see what #3 will be like!

Puka99

My first was really hard to deal with as a baby-wanted to be held all the time, woke up every two hours to eat until he was 2, never STTN, stopped taking naps at 15 months. my youngest would only wake up once a night to eat until about 6 months and he STTN and still takes naps at 2. He will take a 3 or 4 hour nap all the time. It's great.

But they are both wild and rambunctious and crazy.