DD would rather be by MIL :(

nikkisrf

My inlaws are very involved in our lives and baby sit a lot for us.  Granted MIL can be overbearing at times she is great with DD.  With that said, when she comes over to watch DD, DD reaches for her.  She snuggles in her neck and it breaks my heart.  She only used to do that with me.  Then when I go to give her kisses and say goodbye she clings to MIL and looks away.  Do any of you ladies have expierience with this?  Im not sure what I did to make this so.

hollandmama

You did nothing wrong. Actually I believe you did everything right: your DD has no anxiety issues, she knows that even though you are away she is safe, you have transmitted her your calmness.

I am on the same boat, except that I don't feel sad. I took a long maternity leave (6 months) and now I've been back to work for 4 weeks. My MIL is taking care of LO 3 days a week (never took care of him before as we live abroad and he moved in only 4 weeks ago). Whenever she is around he smiles like crazy at her and he also snuggles in her neck and looks away when I say goodbye. He was happy with her from day 1, even though I never left him for so long (10 hours).

I know is hard to see how our LOs can love and feel protected by other people (mostly if it was only you for a while), but be grateful that you DD is happy when you are away instead of crying. She doesn't love you any less by loving his grandma, and I'm sure when she is fussy she still reaches for your arms.

ASmallWonder

You didn't do anything.  She loves her grandmother and that's awesome.  I shit you not, I may as well not even exist when my ILs are around and you know what?  That's totally fine  My son adores them and the feeling is mutual and I choose to see all the positives that go with that.  He has more people in his life that he adores and trusts and two more people who want the best for him.  Then I take that time he's loving them to do something I want to do :-D  

My son will flat out tell you that his "Bampy" is his favorite person and best friend.  I love that because I know he loves me and your daughter loves you, too.

nikkisrf

Thanks for your words.  It makes it a lot easier to see the positive side of this.  I suppose its hard because I am not that close with my MIL but if she is thats great.  Thanks again for helping me understand this is a good thing.

kelseyhh

If it makes you feel better, my son does that with any family member that is holding him. If I'm holding him and DH tries to talk to him, he snuggles in my neck and looks away. If DH is holding him, he does the same thing if I try to talk to him, etc. I always just joke that he's being shy!