Please share your custody schedule!

spout3

New here... And new to all of this! My husband will be moving out February 1st (we are separating and filing for divorce). We have 2 daughters ages 2 and 3. I'm a stay at home mommy and are with my girls all the time. He works mon-fri 9-6 type of thing. We are starting to discuss custody of the 2 girls and I'm at a loss. He thinks he will see them all the time and I will never be able to heal if he's around all the time! I'm very hurt after finding out he's been having an affair and would love to stick it to him, but I need to keep the girls best interest in mind. I was thinking of him coming over to see them 2 nights a week (dinner and put them to bed while I go out and run errands) and one day on the weekend he can see them for a full day. Too much? Too little? I have no guidance as far as custody schedules are concerned.... Please share yours!

MinnesotaMomma91

Too little. I hate to say it but your basically saying you want visitation. Having an affair while thats shitty, its equally shitty for you to try to stick it too him.

If he files for joint custody that is what is best for your kids.

spout3

That's fair... Please share your schedule so I can get a gauge as to what might be more appropriate ...thanks!

tig594

I'd love to help but we just started fighting over ours and haven't agreed on anything yet.  BD wants to move back in (noway!) and I want court supervised visitation if he gets anything at all.  Hopefully you can reach a comfortable agreement sooner rather than later. 

MinnesotaMomma91

My case is different bd doesnt want ds and lives across the country. But bf now is filing for full custody officially for his ds since his bm hasnt seen their child in almost two months. Their scheduale was one week with dad ine week with mom

jellybean529

I was right there with you with my XH back in September  (infidelity was also a big part of our break up). He moved out, rented a bedroom in a house up the road, and came over 2-3 nights a week to put her to bed and then had her EOW, but since he was only renting a single bedroom she would still sleep at my place. It sucked but it was good for DD to still be able to see her dad. 

He decided to move out of state and I moved back home this month so now he doesn't see her at all and that's actually been a relief on the one hand for me because I don't have to see him all the time, but he will be coming to see her a couple weekends a month, so he says. I'm kind of dreading having to be around him, but I'll bite my tongue for DD's sake.

Hang in there, it's a rough road but you will get through it.

jellybean529

Also, if it helps, my sister is also going through a divorce and with her two kids (5 and 7) she and her XH switch weeks...so he'll have them Monday night-Sunday, drop them off at school Monday morning, then she picks them up and has them the following week.

jokimoto

So granted my LO is only 5 weeks, but at the moment he comes from 10-6 every saturday.  It's written into the parenting agreement that once she turns 3 he'll have her from 6pm fri-6pm sun EOWW.

inthelost

none. I have her. he's only met her once in her life and refuses to see her again, even if I bring her to him. His new girlfriend is more important than his daughter...

lilmermaid23

We decided that BD would get the baby 2 days a week (every other weekend and every other weds-thurs) also he gets holidays on the odd years and I get the even years. Summer time he will get him 6 weeks but we agreed to spilt it up into two week increments throughout the summer so he doesn't go that long without me or his dad. Right now BD and I are dating again so we haven't followed the schedule but if we break up we have the schedule to fall back on. It's tough I know. Hang in there and the tramp he had an affair with well let's just say what goes around comes around!

jjdillie

Every other weekend is standard. A friend with older children (teens) split time between both parents. One week the kids are with mom, the next week with dad.  Since your girls are pretty young, I don't think that would be best. My DS is too young (1 year on the 29th ) to be away EOW. It's also in our agreement that BD gets 1 weeknight visit but since he lives an hour away, I don't see that ever happening.