MOTN

Lesley726

Morning ladies! Lurker here (used to participate some and just getting back). The newest Dear DH post has me wondering...how many DH actually get up with their LO's in the MOTN?

HisChamaoleGirl

I said never, but that is bc in the early days when he was on paternity leave and I on maternity leave we both stayed up pretty late bc LO didn't go to bed until late. I am EBF so when she did wake up I would get up with her. Since about week 4/5 she started sttn and neither of us have to get up motn.

Lesley726

I never really did mind that my DH didn't participate at night until more recently. My little girl has always been a good sleeper until the elusive 4 month sleep regression hit us a few weeks ago. Now he can't simply understand why I am asking for some help at night. I'm hoping this poll will A) help me to realize I need to suck it up or get him to realize he needs to suck it up:)

ravenclaw1

I get up to feed her. If after eating she needs additional help getting down, H helps. But if it's just eating, it's just me since I EBF.

This is only because we're both working now. When I was on leave it was all me.

ajbook

I said, only if I ask for help. I don't really say anything though. I still bf at night, so he only comes in if she's eaten and won't go back to sleep.

Chilko33

LO is EBF and my DH may have man boobs, but they sure don't make milk!

MegStark

I voted "always" but that's just been since I've gone back to work. It's not always that we're all three up though. Him and I try to take turns, but lately it's been more of a tag team thing. She was sttn but now is going to bed earlier and wakes up just once. We have a system that once she is up my DH goes and changes her diaper while I get a bottle ready. I then feed her and she quickly falls back asleep. Once we're all "up for the day" in the morning, I go change her diaper/get her ready for daycare while he makes a bottle. He feeds her and plays with her/gets all of her daycare "stuff" (bottles labeled, etc) ready while I shower and get myself ready for work. I then leave to take her to daycare early so he can get ready for work.
BTW, he picks her up from daycare and plays with her until I get home. I give her a bath and feed her while he makes us dinner. She eventually goes to sleep and we repeat everything above.
That was a lot more info than anyone needed, BUT yeah... that's pretty much a typical day at our house

kje120

If DS only wakes up once during the night I get up since I BF, but if he wakes up a second time I will sometimes have DH go get him and give him a bottle of pumped milk if he needs fed.

amelbug

My husband travels Monday-Thursday, so it's all me! Also, he can sleep through her screaming so even at weekends I get up. It's frustrating but then I get to snuggle my baby more.

Shanmarie1083

I voted he always does. LO almost never wakes up in the motn anymore (I'm probably jinxing myself now). When she did since I BF, he would wake up and change her diaper and then bring her to me to feed and put back to sleep. If I'm up he's usually up with me. 

One of the many reasons he's pure awesome 

:x

sapphire0228

I voted only when I ask. But I hardly ask. DH works crazy hours and even though I'm working too I don't ever have to wake up early. He wakes up with her movement but falls back to sleep. If she just needs her pacifier he will do that. She's sttn the majority of the time so it hasn't been an issue. Although, last weekend she showed us how it could be without sleep. We traded until midnight and I woke up with her throughout the night. It kind of pissed me off because he was off for the weekend and I was working both days and yet I still did all the rocking, shhing, changing, singing, feeding (EBF). We exchanged words and he gets it now. But then again, he's just not good at putting her down yet. It frustrates him because everything he does she just gets louder, even if its the same thing I would do. Bittersweet.

Ok that was more also but I guess I needed to get it out.

Nukke

DH is up every single time with us.  He's on diaper duty, and I'm on boob duty.  While he's changing her, I'm getting ready.

TKtravels

I said never, although he absolutely would if he could help somehow. 

LO is exclusively EBF and refuses bottles, and H is unable to go back to sleep once he wakes up.  It makes no sense whatsoever for him to get up. 

MOTN wakings/feedings are super easy in our household though because we bed share.  I'm a very light sleeper, so I'm up and tending to LO before she even has a chance to cry and disturb H. 

DaisyZH

DH is a super-heavy sleeper and I'm a bit of an insomniac so I handle 90% of wake-ups. He will help if I ask him, I just have to wake him up first.

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michelle7482

Only if I ask for help, which is hardly ever. But I am a stay-at-home mom and he works. He also gets up with the kids on the weekend morning so that's when I catch up on my sleep. I get to sleep in.

HBirdie

SS- there's no "take turns" option? I take the 10pm-4am shift by myself, after 4, it's his turn (although I EBF so I have to wake up enough to pull a boob out).

noelani42

I put SS because the first 2-3 weeks he got up every time and helped change her, hand her to me to nurse, etc. He doesn't get up anymore because he doesn't have boobs and sucks at getting her back to sleep

averettgirl

DH gets up sometimes. He's always willing to help but A, there's only so much he can do since I EBF and B, he's a very sound sleeper and sleeps through her fussing 95% of the time. I don't think he has any idea how crappy I sleep at night because he's in a coma lol. If he hears her, he wakes up and helps where he can, like entertaining her so I can pee quickly before I feed her or changing her for me. Otherwise it's all me.

kje120

Loppy19 said:

He helps if I ask but unless he decides it's party time or is inconsolable I rarely ask. He gets up with the kids one morning a week while I sleep in. ETA: If our daughter wakes up then he gets up and takes care of her since I have DS all night- and he's never STTN.

Oh yeah, if DS1 gets up my husband deals with him since I will be the one that more than likely will be getting up with the baby.

munchkinsmama

Me and DH decided before DS was born that I would deal with all MOTN situations till my maternity leave was up. When we ended up FF he decided on his own to take the last feeding so I could go to sleep earlier, as well as every other feeding on Friday and Saturday. So far LO has STTN since I've been back to work, so we just switch of Saturday and Sunday morning to let one person sleep till 8. So I voted helps when I ask.

AppleMuffins

I voted if i ask, but I never ask unless he's already up. DD is EBF and I'm the one home all day, so I do it. Back in the beginning when he was on paternity leave and she was up a lot more at night, he always got up without me asking.

Kristonita12

We switch off. LO is still waking at 10 PM, 2 AM and 6 AM. One night, I'll take the 10 and 6, the next I'll take the 2. Whoever's turn it is does the diaper change, feeding, burping and putting back down to sleep.

kailet

I picked "always" but I do often have to ask. But usually I just ask him to get a bottle ready for me and then I feed her. Sometimes he just does it on his own without me asking. So generally he's up in some capacity, but I don't always have to ask.

ETA: Sometimes DH has to stay out of town for work and obviously I'm on my own on those nights.

ocnfish4

He used to. But now he doesn't ever.

blondii428

I have to admit I've gotten kind of spoiled.  During maternity leave I was up with him all night (only slept about an hour at a time).  Now that I'm back at work, DH gets up for any of the MOTN feedings since he gets up at 9 and I have to get up at 4:30.  He also only works a couple of hours, while my day is 12+ hours with commuting.

thedash

I do all the wake ups with DD because she only wakes if she needs to eat and I BF.

DH does almost all wake ups with our toddler. Lately he gets up in the MOTN more often than I do.

CDMay2006

jesnic89 said:

SS- I am a SAHM and also EBF. DH gets up with her on weekends as long as we know she isn't hungry. He would get up with her anytime I asked, I just don't like waking him up when I know he has to wake up for the day at 4am. Plus he never hears her crying in the night.

This, except he gets up at 430.

sugarellie

FI gets up just as much , if not more than I do. We both work full time so we see it as an equal job, but LO's rock n play actually goes on FI's side of the bed ( it started that way since I was getting up to pump for the first few months) and has just stayed that way. LO gets up 4-5 times a night though and pretty much always has, so I don't know how either of us would function if we didn't share the responsibility

Nw967

I work the overnight shift so my husband has her at least 3 nights by himself! I do everything on my nights off

Tally879

I voted SS, EBF and LO only gets up once to eat, so H wouldn't be too helpful, we nurse in bed though so H gets woken up a bit, but doesn't complain or anything.  We nurse for 20 minutes and then he's right back asleep.  I'm sure H would help if needed, he did in the early days when we were supplementing.

hmlynch84

I voted never ever...but it's because I EBF, so there is no reason for him to get up. However, I go back to work on Monday so I might have him start giving LO a bottle at one motn feeding so I can start getting more sleep.