Your natural birth experiences?

kat4905

Hi ladies,

This will be my first birth, but I was wondering if any of you had any stories or thoughts to share about your natural birth experiences...pros, cons, etc. I am getting more nervous as the time approaches, so I'd love to hear some of your experiences! Did you feel it was beneficial for your bonding with your baby? How intense was the pain? Did you have any regrets? I'd love to hear it all!

Thanks!

Dreamingmommy4

I had a great experience. I went into labor at 40wks4days. I labored at home for about 5 hours, during which my water broke. I went to the hospital and labored by walking the halls, in a jacuzzi tub, on a birthing ball, in a kneeling position on the bed and with a peanut ball. Active labor contractions were tough and very intense but to me those were a cakewalk compared to the pelvic pain I was experiencing. With every contraction it felt as though my pelvis was trying to split in two. I don't know if it was how DD was turned or what, but it wasn't fun. I was in active labor for 2 hours at 6cm and I got stuck at 6cm. The pelvic pain sucked and I hadn't slept the night before and I had been laboring unmedicated for 16 hours. I decided I wanted the epi. I'm really glad I got it. It helped me to relax and sleep a bit. Before the epi was given, I had a 1/4 dose of fentynol administered, I was to the point where I had lost my focus and the pain was taking over and I started to panic and that helped to calm me down, but wasn't enough to last long or make me unaware of what was happening. I did end up with a tiny dose of pitocin, just to get me past 6cm. Which, I did, it only took an hour for those last 4cm after the pitocin. For pushing my epi was turned off so I was still numbed a bit but I could feel enough of the contractions that I directed my own pushing. I pushed my DD out in under an hour with only a small 1st degree tear (I attribute that to the perineal massage I requested, which the MW performed). She was 9lbs. 3oz. We did immediate skin to skin and she nursed within her first hour of birth. She was very alert. I don't have any regrets about how my experience went and I would do it over again exactly the same. I think I feel that way because of how I educated myself beforehand. I had written out a birth plan and everything that was done during my L&D was given with my knowledge and consent, each decision was discussed by myself, my MW and DH. I felt that I had control of what was happening and it made me feel confident that I was doing what was right for myself and my baby.

KateLouise

I've had two natural births and I can truly say I LOVE giving birth. Yes it's hard work, and yes it hurts, but it's just the most amazing thing to go through.

DD1 was born after 7 hours of active labour (30 hours labour total). 9 lbs. Needed 2 stitches. In hospital. Used the shower and tub for relief, also a little nitrous oxide but in hindsight would have been fine without it.

DD2 was 2 hours of active labour (11 hours total) 10lbs 2 oz No stitches. Used the shower (born on the bathroom floor delivered by DH oops)

I think my biggest pieces of advice are to get as much rest as you can early on (sleep, snack and hydrate) and to try and relax through each contraction. I remember panicking as the contraction built, so I wasted energy fighting it rather than just going with it because each contraction will end.

Best wishes for your upcoming birth!!

Brit83

Our son was born at home and it was wonderful!  Total labor was about 3.5 hours, 20 minutes of pushing and he was born in a birthing tub.  I had moments throughout my pregnancy of total fear and nervousness at what it would be like and yes it's hard, but you can do it.

What helped me the most was going to a really thorough birth class that was specific to the type of birth I wanted (natural home birth.  There were others in our community for hospital births, natural birth center births, etc).  It gave me a good overview at birth as a whole, the different stages, and coping techniques for pain.  I also LOVED the relaxation script in Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn.  My husband would go through that script every night before bed with me.  You practice relaxing and isolating muscles in your body so you can learn to not tense up.

sschwege

I did Hypnobirthing both times and thought it was great, a huge help!  I also did a lot of research on my own, learned about natural forms of pain relief that kind of thing.  I labored at home, which I think is key if you are planning a hospital birth.  With DD I labored at home for 10 hours and arrived at 6cm.  With DS waited a little too long and he was born in triage (it was my fault though, my body was telling it was time and I wasn't listening).

To answer your specific questions, I honestly don't know that it had any affect on bonding for me.  To be honest I felt kind of cheated in that department, at least with my first.  With DD when they handed her to me I was excited of course, but felt very little true emotion.  I remember thinking of all the women who said you will fall instantly in love, and I can say I did not.  I remember the next day looking at DD in my MIL's arms and thinking 'motherhood is so hard, how am I going to do it if I don't even love my baby?'  Then I felt guilty, kept thinking, 'what's wrong with me as a mother that I feel nothing for my child?"  That love did come it took about a day and a half and all of a sudden I was madly in love with her and couldn't remember life before her.  But that was a rough 24 hours for me.  With DS I think I was better prepared, just came to the conclusion that how I felt was how I felt.  I had very little in the way of expectations with him.  I think I felt a stronger connection to him when he was born, but still not that instant love.  Took a day or two.  

As for the contractions, I mean it's hard but not unmanageable.  For me at least it's so different from the pain that comes from bumping your knee or stubbing your toe.  This is a totally natural thing that will come and go like waves, you will always get a break and when you do you will feel pretty 'normal'.  

I didn't have any regrets really.  The only thing I did differently the second time was to remind DH and my mom to remind me to ask for pain relievers after the baby was born (I just do regular Tylenol (not with Codeine) and Advil alternating every 3 hours).  With my first they did not offer me anything and it didn't occur to me to ask.  So 2 hours or so later my MIL was holding DD and she asked if I wanted her back.  I said no that I was in too much pain and she was like, 'then ask for something!' Duh, it just hadn't occurred to me.  So right after DS was born my mother reminded me to ask right away which helped a lot.  The only thing I will do differently next time is to listen to my body.  I was feeling pressure at home and kept talking myself out of what I was feeling.  It was a little scary to cut it as close as we did with DS, but that all could have been avoided if I had just listened to my body.  

pdilly2b

For me, dilation was really difficult and took forever (35+ hours). But because I didn't have an epidural, I could push in a standing squat and then deliver on hands and knees and that only took 20 min. I think I would have been completely ineffective at pushing had I been on my back. I also felt basically perfect within about 10 min of DS being out. Those reasons are enough for me to try it again.

I also though coping with the pain was largely related to mental preparation. The jacuzzi tub at the hospital was also a godsend for pain relief and allowing me to rest.

aylafsu88

I had a natural birth in the hospital with an OB. I had a high break in my water and a slow leak. Contractions started right away at 10 mins apart. For the most part I was comfortable in early labor. I moved around, tried a bunch of different positions until I found what worked for me. I labored on hands and knees in the tub or on the toilet. Once I found the position I could deal with the contractions. They were hard and got more intense but the water and the position helped me manage them. Transition was OK for me. It was hard and the contractions intensified but the break between them I was able to regroup and recover. The worst part was pushing. It was the most intense, painful process I have ever dealt with. I may be a unique situation as my LO had a nuchal hand. It literally felt like I was being ripped open from the inside. My OB let me deliver in the position I felt comfortable (which was side laying) and used warm compresses and massages to help with the tear. I was a bit freaked out and ready for the process to be over with so I pushed LO out quickly. The speed and her nuchal hand landed me with a second degree internal tear. As soon as LO was out though I felt fine and the pain was instantly gone, it was great. I felt a bond with LO right away but it was not that intense love bond. It was more a relief bond, like I was happy it was all over and that she was safe and healthy. For a long time (4 months) I felt like I did not know what I was doing but I got the hang of it. Somewhere around 8-12 weeks I felt that intense bond and love but in the beginning it was so hard and I was so tired. I loved her but I was also trying to get the hang of things.

SidraJedi

I had a great experience with my one homebirth 10 months ago when I had my daughter.

I feel that birthing at home was a wonderful opportunity to bond with her and part of the reason I chose home birth. I do not think that having an epi (or other drugs) or going natural has any effect on your bonding experience with your child. Skin-to-skin contact and minimal intervention upon the baby's arrival does have an effect on bonding IMO. I was glad to be at home and to be attended by professionals that respected my need to get to know my child and my child's need for me.

The cool thing for me about birthing without pain meds was personal. I have a primal connection to my birthing experience that I found to be prepatory for motherhood and empowering as a woman and an individual.

I am not a wuss. I have a high tolerance for pain. I also have a wide bone structure head to toe. Still for whatever reason (my almost 9 lb baby wa turning during labor so I'm guessing this was it) labor was very intense for me. Aside from the physical intensity, I was very worried about my ability to be a good mother so that may have stressed me out during labor. But I got through it and next time I may not experience the same level of intensity. I had good coaching from my midwives and I had my husband's
support physically and in spirit.

I did nothing to prepare for labor, no classes or techniques. I did yoga on and off throughout pregnancy though I had a daily practice for six years prior. I did some walking here and there (I was a distance walker and occasional jogger before pregnancy. I read Spiritual midwifery. I induced labor with acupuncture (which also helped to turn the baby and to get me talking about my fears toward motherhood). I can't say that I regret not preparing but on hindsight I could have done something else. I didn't because hypnobabies, Bradley,etc didn't seem to fit. If I could have done anything, altering my yoga practice to evolve as my pregnancy evolved might have helped me to relax more readily.

As far as regrets really goi am completely okay with the way that everything went. I want to go back on time and give my old self the confidence that I have now but I am not sure how I could have done that back then in real time. In fact, I'm still working on my confidence level right now I didn't like laboring in the tub but next time I may try a hot shower...

There were no drawbacks to my natural home birth. I loved everything about it. As long as I become pregnant again at some point and that pregnancy is as low risk as this one
was I will be having another home
birth.

ETA: typo

Nickel726

Natural birth was a wonderful experience for me. There have been a lot of great suggestions. Stay home as long as possible, get a lot of rest, relax between contractions, have supportive people whispering affirmations in your ear. I wanted to lay on my back when I pushed because that was the only way I could really relax between contractions. Do what works for you and don't be afraid to speak up. The contractions were intense at times but manageable. They seem to go by quickly, too. Pushing was less painful than I thought it would be. I was so in the zone that I was only focused on pushing. Once your baby is out any discomfort immediately goes away. Sure you'll be a little sore but it's nothing you can't handle with an ibuprofen, if needed. My son was 9 pounds, 13 ounces and I receive two stitches. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Eve_Angelique

I had a wonderful experience with my first labor. I am excited to do it again! It is definitely a trying experience but you can do it! Some things that really helped me were thinking that each contraction gets me closer to my baby, and once the contraction is done you are never going to have that contraction again. Once you are in labor let your body tell you what would help you, I found that being in the tub helped me, it wasn't a labor tub, but it was a big enough one that I could hang out in there and relax between contractions. I also had back labor and found that if my husband applied counter pressure to my hips that it really helped. Just the fact that you will be able to move around will help a lot so you can figure out what will work best for you to feel comfortable going through labor. 

The absolute best part is just after baby is born and you finally have baby in your arms, you will feel so amazing! It is seriously the best high!! You body releases lots of endorphins and you will feel wonderful! I remember a couple hours after birth my nurse brought me ibuprofen and I was like "what for??" I felt terrific!

ah625

I have had two vaginal, med-free labors. The only thing I regret is not standing up for myself the first time when they forced me on my back. I still have issues related to my injury to this day.

For me, the pain was trivial. I have dealt with excruciating migraines and kidney stones for over a decade. So in comparison to some of that, labor wasn't hard for me to cope with. However, my labors were both incredibly short (both under 3 hours from "this is it" to "baby!") so I think not having a long drawn out labor made the pain seem less intense.

lioness13

I had an awesome natural birth and I hope you do too! Here's a link to my birth story: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/9088303/natural-birth-story

mrsblueeyes

Lots of wonderful encouraging stories.  For me being mentally prepared was key.  I really enjoyed hypnobirthing tracks and videos, I enjoyed reading positive birth stories, and learning relaxation and breathing techniques to let the body do what it needs to do on it's own.  Breathing into each contraction as opposed to clenching down and fighting what my uterus was trying to do. I was surprised by how well I felt during the whole process and how calm I was.  Towards the end, I was pretty uncomfortable and no amount of breathing was helping.  Just as I started to say I needed to have someone check me or do something... I started involuntarily pushing.  Baby was out 2 minutes later with the next contraction. 

It was a surreal experience, especially since the OB wasn't there.  My husband scooped him off the bed and handed him to me, and the nurse covered him in a blanket and we just stayed that way for what seems like a very long time.  Though it was my third, labor was 6 1/2 hours from first contraction till baby.  Very doable.

luvU2theMoon

I am more of a lurker on this board but i really appreciate reading all of these birth stories... SO EMPOWERING! i am so excited to go through a natural birth. thanks for your stories ladies.

Pink724

It's been almost 7 months since I gave birth to my daughter naturally and I absolutely loved it.  It was the hardest and most empowering thing I've ever done, and I can't wait to do it again.

Staying positive and confident is important.  Your body is made to do this, and you are highly capable of delivering this baby.

Additionally, you need to have a doctor/midwife who is dedicated to your plan for a natural birth.  My doctor let me be, and told me she'd be out in the hallway if I needed her.  My doula, DH, and I were able to do our thing and that was critical to helping me stay med-free.  Anytime she did come in, she was super encouraging and helpful.  Never once did she mention an epidural.

Others have given you great advice.  Stay home until you absolutely need to go in - I got to the hospital and was basically at a 7 already.  I also highly recommend a doula, as she was so incredibly helpful before, during, and immediately after the birth.

Good luck!  You can do it!