Venting...sorry

tamararachel2

So my MIL has been here just about 2 months now and DH and I are on our last nerve. I can only be thankful that he and I are on the same side!! So a little update...two weeks after she gets here, she tells us she thinks her girl dog is pregnant. DH flat out tells her no fucking puppies here. The house owners are being gracious enough to NOT make us a pay a pet deposit since this is only temporary. He told her if Angel was pregnant, they would send her to my SIL's house. Well there was no way to get my MIL to my SIL as they are like 8 hours away so DH finally said fine to the puppies being born here. Whatever. She was supposed to get the dogs fixed a LONG time ago. Anyways...those damn dogs have turned the room upstairs into their personal toilet. We don't ever go up there only occasionally but DH finally let his mom have it and told her it was disgusting and that he better not have to replace the carpet. She said she spot cleans but he told her she doesn't do it right or whatever.  Not to mention she doesn't control them...she lets them bark when DS2 is napping and it wakes him and then he's pissed. DH told her she wasn't respecting our house and she gets all butt hurt about it. And then she mopes around then house because she's all hurt. I don't give a shit. I'm so ready for her to leave so I can clean that room up there and shampoo the carpets and get rid of the dogs!

tamararachel2

@RVASC811 You know, I totally agree with you. However, she doesn't want to live in the U.S. She wants to go back to Mexico...she's only here to get some money situations under way. Her husband passed away in 2012 and they were living off of his VA and disability. When he passed away, she stopped getting that money and basically lived off what they had in the bank until it was all gone. She waited way too long to get her finances in order and now she's flat broke. So she came here to go to the VA to get her widow's dependent or whatever it's called at the VA. She'll get that monthly and it's enough for her to live off of down in Mexico. So once she gets that, she's going back. DH thinks it's a mistake but he's told her too many times and she's an adult so she can make her own decisions. However, we won't help her again. She's going to my SIL's once these puppies get sold and DH and I agree that she can't come back here. It's put too much stress on him. This is NOT how he or I thought it would go. He grew up with dogs...I mean they trained dogs for a living. That's what his parents did...they had their own business for training police dogs. So his dogs growing up were all EXTREMELY well behaved. He figured these dogs would be too....um no. She wanted to come to our house because she said my SIL was depressing and boring, but all she does is sit in her room with her dogs. So I don't really see why she couldn't do that there. I know it's hard for DH to get upset at his mom because she's still grieving, but he's ready for her to go just as much as I am.

stephcarter

I don't want to live here, I want to live on a gorgeous resort in Jamaica. But guess what, that's not reality.

She said she's an adult and can make adult decisions? Yet she's stuck in the situation she's in? I understand that losing her husband must have been hard, but she needs to get it together. She needs to grow up and get out of your house.

lady dixneuf

I'd like to live in Paris.

I also mean this in the nicest way but you guys are enabling her bull$hit.

Get her out. 

You can tell her things all you want but until your actions are in line with what you guys say, she's going to listen to those.  Let her go sell the puppies (that is so ridiculous, I cannot even) somewhere else. Seriously. This is just insanity.

ChrisG83

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. Does she get info on how her VA stuff is coming along? Is there a general time frame for that?

BabyCarryingVessel

Yes, what Chris said, how much longer before the VA spouse thing kicks in? I'll agree with the others in that you and your DH will have to show her some tough love. Is it possible for all the dogs to live outside somehow? (Not sure how frigid it is where you live). It's one thing to take her in, but the puppy situation is straight ridiculous. I can't believe that she thinks it's okay to impose that on your home.

pinitbaby

Sometimes its hard but you have to put your foot down. We were given a puppy for xmas and Im soo sick of cleaning up poop!! I can imagine what its like for you there UGH. Be strong lady, dont let her manipulate you.