Doesn't Want to Stop Playing to Go Potty

beautiflaw

x-posted to Toddlers 24+

So finally I figured out why DD is holding her pee and poo. She doesn't want to stop playing to go potty. She throws a royal hissy fit when I tell her to stop what she's doing to try to go because I can see her holding it. I tried the timer and that hasn't helped. We have 6-7 potty books all glorifying the potty, wearing big girl panties, etc. We have a ton of fun stuff in the bathroom for her to do (half her books and toys are in there, she watches shows on my phone, we have stickers and playdough, etc) and we do a song and dance and clap each time she goes. She's watched me go I don't know how many times. I've showed her my underwear and told her how my undies stay clean because I use the potty, etc. She also has underwear of her own. I've promised her she can have a pack of Dora panties when she can go a full day without an accident. I even told her about the "Potty Fairy" who takes diapers away and leaves big girl underwear and treats for big girls who can use the potty.

She knows how to use the potty and she does great when she's not involved in something. But when she is really focused, she is REALLY focused. And she's stubborn.

We watched the Daniel Tiger episode to do with pottying... I sing her the little "If you have to go potty, stop and go right away" song. Nothing.

We watched the Bear in the Big Blue House episode to do with pottying, where the mouse creature thing didn't want to potty because he was playing. Nothing.

Any tips? I can't think of anymore ways to make going to the bathroom fun. The only time she gets markers and playdough and screen time with my phone is in the bathroom so if that doesn't work I don't know what will. If anyone knows of some books about stopping play to potty that would be awesome.

chichi589

I don't make it an option. I tell my DD that she has to try to go otherwise we have to clean up her toys and put them away.. She threw a hissy fit once and after she went potty I made her help me put her toys away and kept explaining that only nice girls get to play with their toys. After we cleaned up we read books for a little bit and then I put her on the potty again (30 mins later) and told her she can play with her toys now. Don't let her be the boss, hissy fits aren't fun but there's no reason it should stop you from being the parent! Good luck!

Ylvelill

I agree with not making it an option, I do not agree with telling her she isn't nice.

Just make it simple with a timer, when it goes off it is time to go try. No arguing about it or shaming her, just factual "this is what we are doing" and then wait out the screaming fit until she goes to try.

You can combine it with no fun play time during potty time if she throws a fit first, or a reward if she actually had to go.

dashofreality

@beutiflaw obviously your hoop jumping isn't working. The only thing that worked with my stubborn DD was giving her control. We explained to her that she knew how to go to the potty now and that it was up to her to go. And then we stopped asking her if she needed to go. My husband and I were getting nervous about this plan when she had gone quite a while, and we stared at each other in shock when she got up from playing without saying anything and got on the potty herself. From that point we had a handful of accidents but she was trained, without a fight.

Worth a try, since personally, making a fight/control issue over you must go to the potty because I said so is not my style.

Lhyacinth888

I stopped reminding my son to go when I knew he needed to and he got so much better. I let him have a few accidents and when he did we stopped what he was doing and he had to take off his clothes, get new ones on, clean it up and then I would bring him down to the laundry room while we threw his clothes in the wash. I was never mad but I did make it take as long as possible before he got back to playing. Also it's important that if they do go in the potty that they are allowed to go back to doing whatever they were doing before. With my DS it was all about control.