I'm still very early in all of this, and planning to attend an information session this evening. How private were you with your plans to adopt? I know when many couples are trying to have children, they don't necessarily tell people, and don't announce until the 2nd trimester. It seems to me that even if you wanted to keep things quiet, with the need for recommendations and referrals, that it's hard to keep adoption private even if you really want to. I'm typically a pretty private person, and I know I'll have to field a lot of questions down the road, but I guess my question is is this process as much of an invasion of privacy as it seems like it could be, and how private or public were you with your plans to adopt?
Road to motherhood started Jan 2014
Re: How Private were you?
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours
The process itself wasn't that invasive, but it can vary from place to place.
We had layers of privacy. My family knew from our evolution from TTC to adoption. Close friends were also in that group. The ILs found out when we picked an agency. DH's boss gave a reference, so he knew during the home study. I told my CWs when we went active, and mentioned it in our Christmas card that year. I was warned that people would it me a lot, but they more or less left me alone and celebrated when we got placed
ETA: I got a lot of invasive and insulting questions/comments when we were TTC (and not telling many people). Everything from co-workers offering me free fertility drugs to others asking if I liked children. I definitely put up a wall because I didn't want ignorant comments about adoption. Those ended up happening after placement.
Son #2 - October '11
Son #3 - Hoping to adopt from China some time in 2014!
Our adoption journey: Talkin' 'Bout the Next Generation
Dx MFI, AMA, Endo, AMH .16
Lap 10/09 Removed endometrioma, stage IV endo and adhesions
Lap 2/10 Endometrioma cysts & adhesions returned.
Ivf #1 4/10 Antagonist, ET Cancelled.
IVF #2 2/11 A/ACP+E2V C/P
IVF #3 6/11 Letrozole/Antagonist BFN
IVF #4 11/11 Low stim Antagonist BFN
Lap 3/12 Lap & Selective HSG
Many cycles of Letrozole and LP HCG w/TI and LDN
IVF #5 8/12 Low stim BFN
IUI #1 10/12 BFN br> S&PAIFW