So my husband's aunt offered to throw me a shower. She told me I would have to wait to have it because of 4 of the aunts will be gone (they are snowbirds). My SIL also offered to throw me a shower and even offered to combine my side and DH. The thing is I am not comfortable with having the shower after the baby is born. The reason being I am a huge planner and a very anxious person. I like to have things ready and planned and when I don't it creates lot's of anxiety. When DH aunt offered I just kinda nodded and agreed since I wasn't given a choice. My husband agrees with me and doesn't think we should have to wait for 4 of his aunts to return. We would still have 20 people on DHs side to attend. When I told my SIL about this she had mentioned that the aunt may want to see everyone at once. I'm sorry but I don't agree with this. Isn't this supposed to be a shower for me not for the aunt? My MIL is also a snowbird and I'm pretty sure she will not be attending. Now I know you can't expect people to buy you things but anything helps. I figured if we had the shower before we could then fill in the gaps and have everything or most ready by the time the baby arrives. I have emailed DH's aunt and am awaiting a response. Thoughts?

Re: Delete
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
This.
Purchase what you will absolutley need to have before your baby is here yourself (so, diapers, car seat, safe place to sleep {crib, bassinet, playard}, a way to feed your baby and a few changes of clothes.)
Newborns need suprisingly little.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
Married 8.1.2010
DD #1: Arrived 10.7.2011
TTC #2 Since March 2013
BFP 5.20.2013, EDD 1.26.2014, natural mc @ 5 wks 5.25.2013
BFP 6.21.2013, EDD 3.14.2014, Twins - missed mc @ 7w6d, D&C 8.6.2013
BFP 10.7.2013, EDD June 20 2014 - It's a GIRL!
This is terrible advice.
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
DS, May 2011
To OP, you need to tell who ever is offering you a shower to make it convenient for you. If they want you there then you get to decide when it is, no matter if it's a gift or not. If they want it after the baby is born and you don't want that then don't show.
DD 3/15/12
DD 6/3/14
#4 Due 10/26/18!
Also, my family is different. Having helped plan many showers, no one in my family did it with their terms. It was all what the mother-to-be might want/love.
DD 3/15/12
DD 6/3/14
#4 Due 10/26/18!
I would just tell aunt you'll have to decline her shower idea. A shower AFTER baby is born is a no-go. You have no idea how you'll feel. Then just see what she says.
Otherwise, I swear to you someone else will offer one and if not you'll still get gifts.
Also, just be thankful for whatever you receive. Newborns need nothing but breastmilk/formula, swaddles, some onesies and a place to sleep. That is it. Let go of the "anxiety" over what people buy you. You'll discover a new definition of anxiety with a newborn in your house.
The bumpie formerly known as First Time in MI