How to night wean 10 month old?

downtown80

DS is 10.5 months. He's still waking to eat 1-2 times a night...sometimes 3. This is complete torture to me! The mental and physical impacts I'm feeling from 10 months lack of sleep are horrible. Basically, I'm irritable, impatient, sensitive, and my body just plain aches....every. Single. Day. I have no energy.

I desperately need him to sleep because I just don't know how much longer I can keep functioning like this.

He's eating plenty during the day (6-8 nursing sessions/bottles plus some solids).

Please help! I am desperate and would appreciate any help.

downtown80

RVASC811 said:

Can you send SO in to try first?

We have tried that, but DS just screams his head off. Like bloody murder screams. He gets so worked up that often times he wakes our toddler. And, of course I can't sleep during this time either. Ugh....

RootBeer29

Will he take a bottle?  My DD will be 8 months in a few days and I have a good stretch of time off work, we're going to try sending daddy in with a bottle first and then start decreasing the amount in the bottle.  But I know I can't be the one to go in at all because she'll just want to nurse immediately.  She's eating 3 times a night most nights still and there's no way she needs that much.

TrendyTina

DS didn't start SSTN until he was 16mo. Our answer was to bring him into our bed and it made the wakings much more manageable. We mostly just slept through them. When he started sleeping longer, we transitioned him to his crib (around 19 months) and he slept through the night immediately and has ever since. We followed his rhythm and it worked out great for us. I know it's hard (trust me!), but it's sooo worth it so follow your baby's lead. Good luck to you! 

benmichele

Do the bloody murder screams start right away? Or only once you go in but don't nurse? Have you tried giving it 5 minutes to see if he would go back to sleep? That's how I dropped the 2 am nursing (while keeping the 4am). We learned that if we went in but tried not to nurse, LO would escalate and get totally worked up. One night we decided not to go in right away and he fell asleep in 5-10 minutes and in a couple nights stopped waking up at 2am all together.

downtown80

I will let him cry for 10-15 mins before I go in. I never go in right away (sometimes he does go back to sleep). I cannot go into his room and not feed him; he definitely associates me with food and hysteria starts immediately if I don't feed him. If DH goes in, I think he's just not patient enough and doesn't have any experience (to be honest, I've been the primary parent -day and night- for DS' whole life due to DH's high demand job). And then I end up having to go in anyway.

Neither my husband nor I are interested in co-sleeping, but I do appreciate that suggestion. He sleeps fine in his room (other than the night feedings), and I strongly believe that having my own personal space with my husband is important.

I have thought of bottles at night, but that means pumping. I am just done with breastfeeding and pumping....so much so that I've told DH that if we have a 3rd child that I absolutely will not do it again. I've considered formula just so DH can help without any extra effort on my part. I pump 4 times a day as is (in addition to nursing him) and that is just cutting what I need for daycare bottles.

Sorry....I know that I am whining and complaining and full of excuses. I just need to figure out an approach for him to stop night feeds so I can start feeling human again!!!

But does anyone have any specific weaning tips for nighttime that you've tried? Did you decrease minutes? Have success with SO going in all the time? Did a dream feed work (with a baby this old)?

pb_bride

It will involve some crying and possibly screaming. The Ferber book has an entire chapter on night weaning.  Get the book, it is very helpful.

camedowncrushing

I night weaned DD at 13 months.  What I did was the method of night weaning suggested by Ferber.  Basically say DD went down at 7pm, and got up for her first nursing session at 11pm I needed to stretch it to 12 midnight.  You go in, and you can rock, walk, sing comfort....just not nurse until midnight.  You keep stretching it every night by an hour or whatever you are comfortable with (toward the end I used smaller stretches to get to the morning) until you are done.  It went well overall.  I liked it because I was able to comfort her. 

ec0983

we night weaned around 11 months after 2 ish months of ds sleeping an initial 5 hour stretch (7 pm - 12 am) and then waking every 45-90 minutes to feed the rest of the night.  it was hell on earth and i couldn't take it any more.  we kept waiting for the phase to end, but it never did, so we ended it ourselves.  our solution was to send DH in with a sippy cup of breast milk (ds was done with bottles at that point or we would have done a bottle instead).  he offered the cup to ds to make sure he wasn't waking from true hunger (which we quickly found he wasn't... he would take one sip and then throw the cup across the room).  so then DH just had to deal with the fall out.  the first night, ds screamed and cried for about 90 minutes while DH walked, rocked, patted, you name it to calm him down and get him back to sleep.  he then slept until 5 am, when i nursed him and put him back down until 7 am.  the next night, it took DH about 30 minutes to get him back down after he refused the cup, and again he slept until 5, nursed, back down till 7.  the next night, we skipped the cup altogether, and it took about 10 minutes, and the night after that, he slept 7 pm to 5 am.  it was bliss.  of course that phase only lasted about 2 months and now his sleep is crap again, but that's due to a mess of circumstances that have been out of our control.  whatever you choose, consistency is key!  pick a lane and stay in it for at least a week!  GL

jllmb79

With DD#1 around 10 months I did Ferber's progressive waiting sleep training. She probably nursed about 3 times over night.  Right away with sleep training she was down to one over night nursing. By 12 months she didn't wake to eat anymore.

brideinsummer04

We did the sleep lady shuffle. However, DS was 14 months. If your pedi (and if you have an LC) approve night weaning then I would recommend getting the book Goodnight Sleep Tight by Kim West. I think it started with allowing one night nursing then complete night weaning. Our pedi told us that he would make up for the missed night nursing during the day and with solids, but idk if the same could be said for a 10.5 month old. I see a lot of others uggested Ferber, idk for sure but other Moms have told me Gerber is quicker but the sleep lady shuffle is gentler. So I would pick whichever is right for you and your family. GL!