Intro and current situation

ChelsiAnn13

Hi everyone. My ex and I were together for five years despite him flirting and cheating on me through out it. I was...dumb really... and kept trying to make it work. He went to go hang out with a girl I was not comfortable with, I told him if he walked out we were done, he went anyways and I broke up with him. After everything he put me through and even telling me at times he wasn't sure he wanted to be with me, he is having trouble with the break up. We are on fairly good terms but I have started dating someone and he is not happy. That said he wants to be in my LO's life but almost never tries to see her.

About my current relationship. I didn't intend to find anyone, but after getting to know each other he asked me out. I turned him down many times since I am a single mother and my last relationship was kind of bad. (I had complications during my pregnancy causing me to gain a lot of weight plus what I went through with my ex also left me with bad self esteem) He finally sat me down and told me how he really liked me, he could actually see himself wanting a future with me and he is looking for something serious. He also told me he would have no problem loving my daughter as his own. He continues to be wonderful to me but I am trying to take it slow.

I am not sure why I am even posting, and I am sure I have questions I just can't articulate them. I feel torn. I want my LO's father in her life but at the same time I have no interest in going out of my way to make sure he sees/ spends time with her like he should. And in all honesty he is too immature to even realize he is making a bad decision. If I do get married again (which would be a ways away but just expressing my feelings), I would want my LO to recognize who ever it is that actually steps up for her and loves her. I can't force her of course but I feel I would want to nurture that mindset... I don't know what I am doing. lol...

Thank you for listening.

MinnesotaMomma91

Welcome to the board. Youll find there is a couple of us with serious bfs.

20thirteen

Welcome, sorry about your situation.  It seems similar to mine. I feel like I say that so often, but then again, we're all in a situation like this. My BD cheated on me all the time and when I told him I was pregnant, he ended up leaving me for another girl who had a 1yr old, after telling me he didn't have what it takes to be a father.  Which makes the kind of sense that doesn't. I have a pretty serious boyfriend now, he was an old flame who I lost contact with years ago.  He messaged me out of the blue when I was 8.5mo pregnant and we've pretty much been inseparable. BD doesn't make appearances so we'll see how that works out for us later.