Intro and Will I always be a little bit scared??

acrookston

I'm a STM and currently 23w5d.  I have low platelet counts and because of this it is a (small) possibility that I won't able to get an epidural.  I decided that instead of being told what I can and can't do, I would just opt for a natural birth.  Don't get me wrong, that's not the only reason why I decided to go natural.  With my DD, I was induced early because I had GD.  The process was long and arduous.  I ended up getting an epidural because that's just what I thought you did.  I was very disappointed when the nurse told me to push on the next contraction and I couldn't feel the contractions at all and had to be told when to push.  I didn't feel very connected with the birth of DD.  This time I want to be more present throughout the process.  So DH and I have found a birth center that we are going to deliver at and I have ordered more books than I care to count about natural deliveries.  My husband is pretty grossed out every time he uses his iPad because if I'm not reading my books, I'm googling natural childbirth videos( and possibly forgetting to close the windows when I'm done...oops).  Even though I've made the decision to birth naturally, the videos still make me squirm and I'm scared.  Is this normal?  Does the fear ever go away or is it just how you handle it?

rooftop

Look up Hypnobabies birth videos. not all NUCB needs to be scary and "painful". I understand that going into the unknown is a lil scary but you are going to have a better expeiriance and an easier time if you can deal with your fear before hand. Fear itself actually has a negative effect on our bodies during labor. It releases stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline which can draw out and even stall labor. Fear also causes tension which interfers with movement and causes even more pain.
My advice to you is to research and find a coping technique that you can be confident in and start working towards releasing that fear through education and practice. Good luck.

aylafsu88

I understand where you are coming from. I only saw one birth video that our Bradley instructor showed in class and I looked away most of the time. I know that birth is normal but for me seeing it made me more scared and grossed out. I do not like blood in general and thought of stretching and tearing made me scared. I decided to not watch any videos but instead to read natural birth books. I felt prepared and had a great birth. When I was in the moment I did not have time to worry about tearing or to be scared, I just focused on getting the baby out.

jamrosj

I've found with the more information I get, the less scared I am. Even watching birth videos is NBD because I know what to expect. 

ec0983

after i made the initial commitment to go natural and med free with DS if possible, i did feel a little bit scared.  so, i spent a ton of time on this board, read a gazillion positive natural birth stories, and found tons of information on what to expect during the labor and delivery process.  all of those things really did help to ease my fears.  i never totally shook a small amount of anxiety i had, just because even with all the research and reading, there was no possible way for me to know exactly what to expect and i hate not knowing ex.act.ly. what to expect.  but, once labor started, instinct and all the prep i had done kicked in and i felt totally in control the whole time.  now that i'm expecting #2, i'm very much looking forward to labor and delivery

sschwege

I did Hypnobirthing and had an amazing experience both times, so you might look into.

To answer your question though, I think it's totally normal to be a little nervous.  I was nervous both times leading up to labor.  Once I was actually in labor I was totally fine, just got in the groove and stayed focused.  I think it's like standing in line at a roller coaster, you keep watching those cars whizz by and all the while you keep thinking pretty soon that will be me!  But then you get on and you are fine.  Watch some Hypnobirthing videos if you haven't done so already, they tend to be very calm, tranquil births. 

HannahsHope

I was in a similar situation as you (i.e. first birth with epi, and wanting to go natural with the 2nd). I read the book An Easier Childbirth. I didn't do hynobabies/birthing. Although I could see the benefit of that, especially in transition (sorta lost myself about 3.5hrs into transition). I think your preparations are awesome and you're doing everything to set yourself up for an awesome birth. Do you have a strong support system (husband, or close friend, mom, etc?). If not, consider a doula. Although, you are delivering at a birth center, and surely they are going to be awesome supports. Check out the website www.birthwithoutfearblog.com they are an awesome source of encouragement!!

MrsP7309

I planned for a natural birth my entire pregnancy. I practiced Hypnobirth religiously from 30 weeks on. I did Spinning Babies daily from 34 weeks on. I was totally in control my entire labor. But let me tell you - when I got to the hospital and they told me I was 10 cm dilated and ready to push, and I realized that an epidural was impossible, I was terrified! Nervousness is so normal. Hypnobirth really did help me stay on top of my fear leading up to the birth, though.

ktbug3000

I think its totally natural to be scared but i agree with an earlier comment that you will get infinitely more confident the more information you get. I didnt have hypno babies or any kind of specific method but I had read Ina Mays book and tons of birth stories, I had a birth plan all ready to go and tried to stay as relaxed as I could the whole time and never forgot my mantra of "your job is to let your body open, let it do what it will do naturally" I was still scared though at the time. Specifically I had anxiety about pushing. I said as much to my doula and we talked about it. That helped but pushing was the most intense part of the whole experience. Good luck mama