Can't agree on a team.

Kamiegrace1

(Coming out of the lurker shadows)

So DH wants to be Team Green and I want to find out. Because we found out with DS, I feel like I should back down and try to get on board with Team Green, but I'm really dying to know. Has anyone else been at odds with your SO about this?

LindsM16

I had friends do the same thing as mullenem SIL and BIL. The daddy wanted to know but mommy didn't so he found out and kept it a secret the whole time.  

FutureMrsW9

I want to be Team Green but DH kinda wants to know...I have begun to sway his opinion mwahahahaha!  It's one of life's few huge surprises (I mean really it's getting engaged and the sex of your baby...what other huge good stuff is there??) and there are sooooo many reasons not to find out.  That said, my cousins did something similar to what you're thinking and for their first they didn't find out because SHE didn't want to, but then their second they did find out because HE wanted to, and their third they went back to HER decision....that wouldn't be my style, but it worked for them.

As for the comment on being a planner.....It takes an uber type-a personality to NOT find out because think about how much self-control and willpower you have to have to say no when that u/s tech knows the sex of your baby and you don't....way more than the "planners" who claim that they find out because they're planners, they just have no willpower :-)  I'm the most uber type-a planner literally EVER, but I still don't want to know!

Rosebud2587

I want to be team green and DH wants to find out. I wanted to be team green last pregnancy too but backed down cause DH wanted to find out. This time I am standing my ground and DH is just gonna have to deal with it. 

hollyfp

I don't want to know and DH does.  We decided we will take it one u/s at a time.  As for the one coming up, we both agreed to wait.  Hope to keep it going.
If he can really keep it a secret, I would be ok with him finding out (as long as nobody else knows he knows).  We will see when we get to that point... I think he's getting on board the longer we wait.

ricecakes1216

Before I got pregnant we were definitely Team Green. Now we go back and forth. I think it would be awesome to have that moment of "ITS A BOY/GIRL" but then again I am really wanting to start the nursery and deciding on a name would be nice too. 

amwangel

That was us with our son. But I won since I was the one carrying the baby.

lifeisbetteronthered

Last time I wanted to know and DH didn't. I am ultra type A, but it had nothing to do with planning (we were going to do everything gender neutral either way), and everything to do with impatience. DH didn't care if I found out as long as I didn't tell him. I knew that wasn't possible so I sucked it up and it really was a great moment at DD's birth when they announced "it's a girl".

This time DH has left it up to me and I'm torn. The announcement at delivery was wonderful, but I am as impatient as ever. I change my mind daily.

JNerd

I want to find out with this one, but hubby doesn't and has said that if I find out he doesn't want me to tell him.
I just want to know if we should be keeping all of DS's clothes or donating.
Plus the nursery I have planned is much more feminine and don't want to change it to be more gender neutral.

tyrannasaurusjess

We had our gender u/s at 19 weeks the last time around, but didn't find out until our baby shower at 32 weeks (we did the cake thing). H didn't want to know and I did, so that was our compromise. It was soo hard waiting, but SOOOOOO fun finding out that way, and with like 50 of our friends and family there. As of now, with this one, we are finding out right away, but we have been talking about being team green again, if only for a little while.

You've got a little time to decide, but either way once you know you can't not know (if that makes sense). You can always have the tech write it down and you can find out whenever, if you decide you can't hold off any longer!

Lynnja616

Not really.  We found out with DS, with DD DH really wanted Team Green and that was fine.  Same thing this time, I could go either way because there are positives to both- but because DH is so adamant I'm fine with it.  Team Green one more time! 

RaeJ004

With DD I didn't want to find out and he did, so I totally pulled the "I'm growing the baby" card and told him we could do it his way next time. Now that next time is here he has decided that we won't find out.

RaisingABuzz

With our first pregnancy, DH wanted to be team green and I wanted to know (because I'm a planner).  I won because I was carrying the baby.  With our second pregnancy, DH still wanted to be team green so I agreed because we did it my way the first time.  After it was all said and done we both felt it was just as much of a surprise at 20 weeks as it was at delivery.  In fact, I think it was more exciting at the anatomy scan because during the delivery I think the sex of the baby was lost in the excitement of delivery.  We are currently pregnant with baby #3 and are going to find out at our ultrasound.  I am glad we did it both ways though!  Good luck with your decision!

Susanbeth85

I am one of those uber planner type people, but I still don't need to know the sex of my baby to prepare for him/her.  I don't like the argument that it helps one prepare; does that mean that team greens are less prepared? There is a ton of cute, gender neutral stuff out there, so there is no need to know the sex.  The only reason is because you want to, which is fine, but just say that.

Kamiegrace1

I personally would like to know because it helped me bond with DS knowing he was a boy - I could call him by name, pray for him and his future, and prepare myself mentally for a boy (I had my mom and my sister - besides DH, I knew nothing about boys). It had nothing to do with the nursery or the clothes.

ElTrain5

Yeah, to the ones saying "you just have no willpower" etc., that's a lovely opinion.... but let's keep the judgey-ness to a minimum.  Some want to know, some feel that they need to know to properly plan/bond with baby, etc.  They are not failures in any sense, and finding out does not mean they do not have willpower or that they are lying about planning somehow to cover up their true motivations.  Planning and being prepared means different things to each individual.  Just enjoy your choice and your surprise.  (For me personally, there are more than enough "surprises" in the world, I don't feel like I need the sex of the baby to be one of those surprises.  I'll be just as surprised if the kid has hair/blue eyes/my dad's nose, etc.). 

lscal20

I want to be team green, hubby wants to find out. He didn't even argue with me, he said we'll do whatever I want.