Another Lurker---Just Experienced Something IRL that Reminded Me of this Board

VAGrrrl

I'm a longtime lurker but have actually posted here before. Blended Families is the only Bump board I follow but I'm also a lurker/sometime poster on ProBoards. Anyway, I just got back from a massage appointment (I have severe neck and shoulder issues that I'm finally taking care of) and I really heard a doozy! As I walked out of the treatment area and into the front desk area, I encountered a woman on a cell phone who was speaking (loudly) and saying, "No, this is the only number you should have...oh, that number doesn't matter....that's his father....I"M (her emphasis) the MOTHER (her emphasis again)....he just pays the bills....what he says doesn't matter!!" I immediately had a visceral reaction and made such a face that the woman at the front desk asked me, "Are you OK???" After the woman left, I explained why I had the reaction I did and she rolled her eyes and said she was thinking the same thing. Apparently, the front desk clerk is a child of a set of parents and step parents and she was constantly put in the middle. This "mother" had such hate and condescension in her voice that it actually made me think to myself, "I feel sorry for your child (ex husband, etc)." Obviously I don't know her "story," but she definitely gave at least 2 people a bad impression of her co-parenting skills. This encounter made me think of the ladies on this board who deal with difficult ex spouses, from the BMs who have un involved ex husbands to the Step Moms who have involved husbands who are treated like sh*t by their ex wives. Hats off to all of you!!! (ETA---this post had paragraphs when I wrote it and I even edited it to put them back in. No idea why they don't show up once it's posted.)

+just+j+

This is why i dont have or like to take phone calls in public and why i dont understand people who do.

When you dont know the situation ir are only hearing half....you could look really bad.

That and its just rude. I dont care to hear your conversations.

If you are ever in the bathroom with me and you are on the phone, i will sometimes get ballsy flush the toilet and ask really loudly gor toilet paper. Whats sad....more and more, people just dont care they are in a bathroom and subjecting the other person to that visual.

CFjo2010

I am guilty of telling the school/Dr office that my kids' father's phone number doesn't matter and to disregard it in their file.  Granted, DC lives across the Country and is therefore worthless to try and contact in case of an emergency. 

coopsbaby

My exh isn't on the paperwork at dd's school. They only have room in their system for one additional contact besides me and dh and my mother is more reliable.

twister22

BD isn't on any of the contact stuff for school/doctor/sports/whatever. BD actually told me to list DH's info under the father stuff, and I use one of my parents for the additional emergency contact.

ambrvan

We only have our information on any of SD's records, from school to doctor to sports. My information is listed in the mother's spot. We usually clarify that I am the step parent and that BM has supervised visitation EOW only for things like school but not sports unless it comes up. Her doctor already knows and has been involved in the situation since before it began. They voluntarily asked if they should replace BM's info with mine since BM was so unreliable and was wandering back and forth between supervised visits, no visits, out if state, etc for so long. BM is to call us immediately if she has to take SD to emergency room or something like that.

SD doesn't tell people about BM much, though. Everyone on her weekend visits, she prefers not to talk about her and tells her friends I am her mom, sometimes says stepmom but doesn't elaborate about BM. We leave it at that.

And yes, I try not to have personal conversations in public in the phone. I was on campus yesterday waiting to take my final (YAY DONE FOR THE SEMESTER!) and I overheard someone's entire conversation about JoJo screwing over Pookie with child support even though she's not sure it's his kid. Yes, actual names that were said. Lol