AW: RE update

jap618

So I met with the RE today.  He did a lot of talking.  He spent a lot of time explaining "bad luck".  No shit Sherlock.  After soooo much jibberish we have some more blood work being done (AMH, thyroid, karyotyping, maybe more..) and the hysteroscopy scheduled for January 13.  I'm impatient but at least I have the holidays to distract me.  

I'm having a serious pity party for one and I don't know how to kick it.  I'm not ready to gear up for another holiday season without being pregnant or having a baby.  Last year I spent the entire month of December learning about m/c #2 and trying to m/c.  I hate this time of year for so many reasons, which sucks because I love it for so many reasons too.  The doctor did give me the name of a local grief/loss counselor.  I will probably call her since I've known since an early age that talking things out makes my life 1000% easier.    

Thanks for listening ladies; Pom Margaritas (you know.. for ute lining ;-) ):

buggirl72

(((Hugs)))) first because the holidays are hard enough without dates mixed in also. Do you mind if I bring a dessert to your pity party? We could also have some pom-white chocolate chip cookies - anything to help that ute lining!


I think the grief counselor is a great idea - especially since you are comfortable with talking things out but what is it with REs lately! I'm sorry he went on about bad luck and I hope you are comfortable with him otherwise.  On the positive side, it's good he is getting some testing out of the way while waiting for the hysterscopy in Jan.

Last year I just wanted to pull a Christmas with the Kranks and complete skip the holidays. DH went out of his way to make it a good holiday. I don't think there is any easy answer for how to cope but I did push for just a quiet holiday - I knew that I was not up to being at a big family get together. Do what you have to do to take care of yourself. 

RedTwizzlers

((hugs)) I'm sorry you're having a hard time. But I'm glad you had what sounds like a good appointment, and have some next steps planned. I think a grief counselor sounds like a really great idea. I think we could all use some of that. I hope it helps.

jap618

buggirl72 said:

(((Hugs)))) first because the holidays are hard enough without dates mixed in also. Do you mind if I bring a dessert to your pity party? We could also have some pom-white chocolate chip cookies - anything to help that ute lining!


I think the grief counselor is a great idea - especially since you are comfortable with talking things out but what is it with REs lately! I'm sorry he went on about bad luck and I hope you are comfortable with him otherwise.  On the positive side, it's good he is getting some testing out of the way while waiting for the hysterscopy in Jan.

Last year I just wanted to pull a Christmas with the Kranks and complete skip the holidays. DH went out of his way to make it a good holiday. I don't think there is any easy answer for how to cope but I did push for just a quiet holiday - I knew that I was not up to being at a big family get together. Do what you have to do to take care of yourself. 

Cookies + margs = Pretty freaking awesome party  Thanks lady!! 

anitaflora

Just wanted to post and send some hugs and support your way. I'm sorry you're facing more tests and the hysteroscopy but I hope they end up revealing useful information that will help with your moving forward.

I know we all have a hard time this time of year but having the additional challenge of remembering a miscarriage just makes it extra difficult. Lots of hugs to you as you face these memories and work through them.

I think a good counselor can be incredibly helpful so I hope that works out and I think it's a great idea as a way to help with the process. Talking helps me so much too. Sometimes just writing about it even if there's no one right at the moment helps me too - so long as I can get my thoughts out somehow! But I think talking with a good counselor is really invaluable.

Lots of hugs and love your way and hoping all the other happy parts of the holidays helps to ease some of the difficult parts.

jap618

anitaflora said:

Just wanted to post and send some hugs and support your way. I'm sorry you're facing more tests and the hysteroscopy but I hope they end up revealing useful information that will help with your moving forward. I know we all have a hard time this time of year but having the additional challenge of remembering a miscarriage just makes it extra difficult. Lots of hugs to you as you face these memories and work through them. I think a good counselor can be incredibly helpful so I hope that works out and I think it's a great idea as a way to help with the process. Talking helps me so much too. Sometimes just writing about it even if there's no one right at the moment helps me too - so long as I can get my thoughts out somehow! But I think talking with a good counselor is really invaluable. Lots of hugs and love your way and hoping all the other happy parts of the holidays helps to ease some of the difficult parts.

Yeah the RE was talking about how even though we're 18 months into this process it's not over.  Even if we have this hysteroscopy in January and get the green light to try again we have potentially months of trying and then months of worrying if we do get pg and really just re-iterating how exhausting this all is and how he doesn't want me to get exhausted and warn down now because we don't know where this is going or how long it will be going on .  That's when he directed me to the counselor which made perfect sense

gscoville

(((hugs))) and I hope you find a way through the holidays that brings some quietness and peace with minimal hurt. I find I have to work hard to find joy that used to come so easily before experiencing loss, but it's worth the effort try. It's tough I know, but it sounds like you have a solid path ahead of you with some counselling and testing and hopefully answers to come.

sammer818

The holidays are definitely a hard time of year when dealing with everything we have to deal with on this crappy journey. *HUGS*

jenkellen

I get it. My D&C was close to yours. I remember last year being at the hospital and thinking, god...how many women are going through this crap right now? This is complete BS to go into surgery while xmas music is playing in the OR. F'd up. Are we going to spend the week of Xmas virtually drinking together? I say Yes! Bring on the pity party. Those drinks look delish.

KMW08

((Hugs)) I hope you do see a counselor & find it to be beneficial for you.

I was wondering, but will your post surgery treatment be anything like my septum? Estrogen for a month, then progesterone, a balloon catheter?

jenn0021

I'm glad your appointment went as well as could be expected and that you have your surgery scheduled and some more tests lined up. Even though this all just sucks, I'm glad you're moving forward.

I think talking to a grief counselor is a really good idea, I have been thinking of doing the same recently. Hopefully it helps you.

And huge ((hugs)) for the Christmas holidays coming up. This time of year is really hard. I've been feeling down too, thinking about the fact we should have kids here with us. I'm here for you if you need me.

lindsebert

(((Hugs))) So sorry things are so crappy right now. I agree with this time of year just sucking. Which really sucks, because I always love this time of year. There's nothing to say to make it any better, but know that we are all here for you. More (((hugs))).

Also, those margs look amazing!

luciddreamer106

I'm sorry your RE was pushing "bad luck" as a reason for your losses. I'm sure they're trying to help, but it doesn't make it any easier since you can't really prevent bad luck from happening. It's good he recommend a grief counselor because this process is just so hard. ((hugs))

jbasore1123

I think the PPs all gave perfect responses- everything I wanted to say has already been said so all I can offer is (((hugs))). I know it's daunting but I really hope the the further testing gleams some answers for you.