Are there other adoptees on this board? If so, have any of you met your birth parent(s)?
Are there any birth parents here who have met your birth child?
I'm so sorry - but this is going to be long.
In the Spring of 2013, I was contacted by a birth brother who had found a general search post I made on a national site. We exchanged emails for about 3 months where I learned more about my birth mom and family. I also received a call from a representative of Catholic Charities where I was adopted from and had a nice talk with her. In short, this was, indeed, my birth family.
Without getting too much into it, I had a rush of emotions over those few months - I was also pregnant at the time, which didn't help! Thankfully, my birth brother was very respectful of my uncertianty of my feelings and kind of let me lead the communications. For one reason and another, I ended up not continuing communication. It's definitely all me - it has nothing to do with my birth family.
I recently received a friend request on FB from a family member - I thought it was my brother's wife, so I accepted. After some researching, I now think it's my birth mom. She has not reached out to me.
I'm just not 100% sure of how I feel on any of this! I really wanted to talk to my parents about all of this out of respect for them and I do think they would be supportive of whatever I want. It's just that we live over 600m away from each other and I don't think this is a phone conversation. My Mom stayed with me for 10 days last year when I had my youngest, but again I didn't think that was a great time bc she was there to help me and celebrate her new Gandson. Since then, we've only been together one other time (Christening).
I would eventually like to talk to my birth family more - I haven't learned too much about my birth Mom bc my brother has said that this is her story (the brothers only learned of me a few months before they found me). I don't know what their expectations are, though, and that's the scariest. At the beginning, my brother told me that there was a race to find me from other family members - so I removed my post from the adoption site. Another email (from the wife) said it was great to know that her kids had cousins (and we only lived 1.5 hrs away at the time); yet again, this kind of scared me.
We have since moved due to work obligations and we're 1200 miles away.
I guess, in a LONG-winded way, I'm asking - if you've met your birth parent(s) / child, what were your expectations (and theirs). I have absolutely no resentment - I actually feel sad for how the whole situation transpired back in the 70s. And I've read books re: adoption stories from that generation, which really enlightenend me!
Ugh - I have no idea how to feel!! Any suggestions as to where to go from here?!