Having a Rough Time Hearing of Other Pregnancies

PrivateOne

I've taken a break from this board with the holiday and all the goings on surrounding it.  Over the holiday weekend we saw some friends and found out that his brother and SIL are expecting.  We know his brother and SIL casually because we've been at their family functions together many a time. We also knew they have been ttc for a long time, however don't know too many details as they are not our direct friends. 

After a quick discussion of it, I found out she is due next May which is just one month before I would have been due.  I also found out she used the same center we used for our IVF in Oct. Ouch those things really sting.  I'm trying to get over it, but I'm just having a hard time of it.  I find that any announcement of pregnancy or all the kiddos around these days are really making life miserable for me at the moment.

I just need to vent and don't have much of an outlet other than here.  The friends who told us the news about their family member also have had difficulties ttc (mfi runs in the family) and have decided they will live childless becasue they don't believe in medical assistance.  Thus, we don't much talk infertility with them as they've made their decision and it would prolly be an uncomfortable one if I start grilling them on why they won't seek intervention.  So we dance around the issue and they know nothing of our endevours.  I actually just wanted to scream out that I would have been due around then too, however I just kept quiet.

Thanks for listening and I hope we all can find peace and success very soon so we don't have to deal with this s#!t anymore.

 

 

Mrs.McIrish

It is very difficult for me to hear of IRL pregnancies. We are supposed to go to a holiday party this weekend at my sisters but she called me a few weeks ago to warn me of the various people who are pregnant who will be there. I no longer want to go because I want to jump,up,and down screaming "why am I never pregnant" or "why does these people get baby #2 (or3)? " It's people older than me or younger, married for less time etc. It doesn't discriminate. It's just easy for most people and virtually impossible for me. It's just the way it is. And it's hard and it sucks. Everyone thinks we are CFNBC and haven't shared that we are cycling again next month. My first shot of lupron is the day of the party. Not sure how to avoid 3 pregnant women and not drink 3 bottles of wine to ease my uncomfortableness and awkwardness. I cannot talk to pregnant women or congratulate them. I will literally run into another room all night to avoid them. I'm not very gracious about it! Anyway, totally get what you are feeling. Vent away!

PrivateOne

Thank you sooo much, I LOVE your response.  Maybe you could play a new party game called "dodge the preggers", lol.

I know I'm not alone in the hell of infertility, but unfortunately no one can carry our individual burdens but ourselves. It's not fair and their is no solution but to carry on.

Samuelismomma

I just wanted to tell you that my heart hurts for you-:( I know words don't help much at a time like this but just wanted you too know ..thoughts and prayers are with you.....

BeckyP005

 

rubysi

I like "dodge the preggers" I play it all day at work. Between coworkers and customers I am always on the move. I am sorry you are having such a difficult time. >:D<

HeathernSteven

I hear you! Just found out my cousin is pregnant with #2 her lo is 1.5, so I was like ooh yea um congrats? My mom was excited which made me feel sad it wasn;t me making her happy. I know I will love the LO when he/she arrives....I find the children are ok once out, its the pregnant lady that I can't handle - I guess cause I cannot get pregnant I can't handle them

Hope everything works out for you and @Mrs.McIrish!

 

ksgsmu

I understand...  I know several ladies with due dates close to when mine would have been.  It is so painful to see them.

hang in there!

gscoville

It's a hard thing to deal with for sure.  I always think at my age and with my circle of similarly-aged friends I shouldn't have to be dealing with pg announcements so much, but it still happens and it's almost like it hits harder because the age issue is always hanging over me, KWIM?  A coworker/friend who's a year older than me is due to have her 5th child (has two teenagers from a previous marriage and two babies in the last three years), she's due in January right around my loss date.  She told me about her pg very insensitively so I've had a hard time being around her ever since.  Then last week another coworker/friend (same age, we graduated high school together) let me know she was pg with her second.  I keep feeling so very left behind, these announcements are definitely hard to handle.

chucktgirl

Totally understandable! I take many breaks from the boards and sometimes even the world. I received my first Christmas card today: A big-ass picture of my cousin's newborn. Awesome. Super. F'ing. Awesome.

owlprof

I will never be one of those people who send out the Christmas cards with the baby on them.

Good luck to everyone making it through the holidays!