Will DS eventually get out of our bed?

ladylisalt

So my DH and I have been ok with DS in our bed, although I get annoyed more than DH at times. Sometimes DS starts night off in our room and ends up in our bed. Just wondering if there comes an age when a kid looks forward to "staying" in his bed for the night. Or more a less a more negotiable age when you can reason with them for staying in their room. Does this ever happen? I am guessing it is based on each individual kid but was hoping for inspiration.

Emerald27

I don't have experience with this yet, but from what I understand, kids usually at some point "ask" for their own room, if they're still in their parents' room.

DS is in his own bed on the floor next to ours (a twin mattress against my side of the bed). He loves his bed, and he does not come into ours at all. If he wakes during the night and needs me, I move down to his bed. Typically I fall asleep there with him and spend the duration of the night there...it's too much work to stay awake while I get him back to sleep. Lol

You can gently encourage him to stay in his own bed by cuddling there with him and making him feel safe and comfortable then. Don't worry - there will come a time when mom and dad are not cool and you'll have to do everything within your power to get him up in the morning and OUT of HIS room.

nanabanana06

I may be in the minority here, but when we got Rosie into her own crib and then bed we never gave her the option of leaving. She was STTN though, so other than a few random wake ups over the last few years we've always put her to bed and put the gate up. I think almost 2 and a half is a good time to start reasoning with them. Maybe get him and OK To Wake clock. That way you can set it for when it's Ok to come bother you.

Emerald27

Also, if he comes to your room, you can gently lead him back to his and offer to stay with him and snuggle until he falls asleep. That kind of negotiation works pretty well, I'd expect, unless the child is sick or stressed about something and REALLY NEEDS mom and dad all night.

nosoup4u

We bought a toddler bed for DS1 when he was 23 months, and he never looked back. He happily transitioned into his own bed with no problems. DS2 moved into a twin size mattress when he was 18 mos, and didn't ended up in our bed after that. I dunno, DH and I are ok sleeping w kids in their bed if they wake up, which helps them realize their bed is okay for sleeping. But neither of them had a problem transitioning into their own beds.

jane8188

I am so afraid of the dark and have a lot of issues at night still, I tried to go into my parents bed until I was around 11. I remember feeling deathly afraid of my room. I know that's a worst case, but just giving perspective from the other side of things.

skibunny59

jane8188 said:

I am so afraid of the dark and have a lot of issues at night still, I tried to go into my parents bed until I was around 11. I remember feeling deathly afraid of my room. I know that's a worst case, but just giving perspective from the other side of things.

This is me too.  Nighttime was not a happy time for me as a kid.  On top of me being deathly afraid of being by myself in my room in the dark, my parents would get angry, yell at me and then punish me. I was never allowed in their room but it was always night after night of me scared to death and them fighting with me.   I think of how stressed I was about sleeping and how stressed out my parents must have been too.  I never want DD or myself to go through that. 

Still as an adult I'm afraid of the dark. 

jane8188

@skibunny59 how do you handle it now? My husband has to have it super dark or he supposedly can't sleep, although he falls asleep super fast and I am left in the dark. He doesn't get it he thinks I'll just get used to it. I feel like people that aren't afraid just totally don't get how serious it can interfere with everything.

sugarbear0524

ladylisalt said:

 Sometimes DS starts night off in our room and ends up in our bed.

Just keep in mind that your DS doesn't "end up" in your bed. You allow it. If you want to change this habit, you can do so gently. But you do have control of the situation--it isn't just "happening to you". It might be rough for a while, just take it easy with your son and move him along to his bed. Others may have advice on how to do that. My son doesn't want to be in our bed (and I'm thankful for that).