Those who have sleep trained......Come on in. — The Bump
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Those who have sleep trained......Come on in.

We are in the midst of sleep hell in my house. No one is sleeping.

I suspect LO's top teeth are the culprit. She's a slow teether. The first tooth brought 3 weeks of sleep hell with it before it popped.  Once the bottom two both broke, she was sleeping ok. Not great, but OK - up once or twice at night, but only for 5-10 minutes before being soothed back to sleep.

We do seem to be having issues with her self soothing though, and I know we need to do something about it. She goes down with no issues, but wakes up too often and can't get herself back down.

For those who have sleep trained, or for those who may have been in a similiar sitiation anyone have any advice on the best way to work through this?

Additionally, I feel like I need to give her a little more time before I agressively start working on this.I don't believe that attempting cry it out when she is in pain is giong to be effective.  I am also now wondering if she's having seperation anxiety. In the past week she's also fought going to sleep and then cried the second you stop rubbing her back, or soothing her. Last night was so bad I broke my own cardinal rule and brought her into bed with me (confession: worth it. She sacked right out and I LOVED the snuggling).....

Anywho - please help!?!?!? I need some advice from those who have BTDT.


"I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love, I"m still looking up."
TTC #1 since August 2011 MFI Diagnosis - April 2012
IVF #1 - July 2012 - Stims start 7/2, ER 7/12, 20 retrieved, 16 mature, 13 fertilized!
ET - 7/17 - 1 blast transferred. Beta - 7/26 273, Beta 2 7/30 - 1143. Beta 3 8/6 - 11,597
12/25 - Santa tells us "IT'S A GIRL!" EDD - April 4th

Our Little Easter Bunny has arrived!

Molly Mildred born 03/31/13


TTC A Sibling....... FET #1 11/14/14, Transferred one beautiful blast

Remaining four frosties arrested due to "embryologist error"

Plllllleasssee stick little icicle.....Beta 11/23...BFN

Starting ALL over with a fresh IVF cycle

Stims start 11/28/14, ER December 10th, 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, only 4 fertilized 

1 Blast Transferred on December 15th..... Beta Christmas Eve... Please Santa, bring me a baby!

Beta #1 345.....Beta #2....750/ First U/S 1/13/15/HB 131....EDD 9/2/2015

Re: Those who have sleep trained......Come on in.

  • Sleeping is hard isn't it?

    I bought the seahorse a few weeks ago. She loves it, but has not caught on yet on how to turn it on herself etc. So it's not too much of a help. If I go in there and turn it on it helps soothe her, but I'd love to get her to the point where she can do it herself.

    Her room does not have a nightlight. I should probably buy one. and maybe try the lovey too.

    I'm frustrated. She is 8 months next  week and still not STTN. The most I have ever gotten is 8 hours straight, and I've only goten that a handful of times. (Many of them on nights when she has a meltdown earlier and is exhausted from crying)..... If it's teething right now than I can deal, but it's hard to imagine it's ever going to get better.


    "I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love, I"m still looking up."
    TTC #1 since August 2011 MFI Diagnosis - April 2012
    IVF #1 - July 2012 - Stims start 7/2, ER 7/12, 20 retrieved, 16 mature, 13 fertilized!
    ET - 7/17 - 1 blast transferred. Beta - 7/26 273, Beta 2 7/30 - 1143. Beta 3 8/6 - 11,597
    12/25 - Santa tells us "IT'S A GIRL!" EDD - April 4th

    Our Little Easter Bunny has arrived!

    Molly Mildred born 03/31/13


    TTC A Sibling....... FET #1 11/14/14, Transferred one beautiful blast

    Remaining four frosties arrested due to "embryologist error"

    Plllllleasssee stick little icicle.....Beta 11/23...BFN

    Starting ALL over with a fresh IVF cycle

    Stims start 11/28/14, ER December 10th, 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, only 4 fertilized 

    1 Blast Transferred on December 15th..... Beta Christmas Eve... Please Santa, bring me a baby!

    Beta #1 345.....Beta #2....750/ First U/S 1/13/15/HB 131....EDD 9/2/2015

  • I want to preface this by saying that DD has always been a pretty good sleeper.  We had a couple weeks of trouble when I weaned her night feedings, but I really had to do sleep training around 4 months when she started waking at 5am for no reason.

    I hate in the sleep training books that they never really give you an idea for what to do when they are in pain or sick.  When she went through teething, I would do what I normally did wait, 5, 10, 15 minutes and go in and soothe and not pick her up.  If I could tell she was in pain, I did pick her up and rock her..sometimes gave medicine, sometimes gave her a little food, and just had to wait it out.  That seemed to work and I only had to deal with that for about 3-4 nights.

    She does have a nightlight and a lovey in her crib that I introduced around 7 months.  She is 9 months and I think if she does wake up in the middle of the night she uses that to help soothe back to sleep. I haven't gotten up one time in the middle of the night since around 7 months. She sleeps from 830-730 every night.  When I hear her in the morning she usually plays in her crib with her lovey for a good half hour.  The lovey I have is a bunny with a blanket on it and it has the taggies all over it.  She loves those.  I got it at Target.  It stays in her crib at all times.

     

    Right now she seems to be  challenging when going down for sleep because of separation anxiety/etc....and I do the same thing I do in the middle of the night.  Put her down, let her go 5 minutes, go in and soothe..repeat.  She typically goes down within 15 minutes.

    I think the thing when you start sleep training is to be consistent, which can be so challenging because it is hard to hear them cry.  But it is really important because they need to learn how to self soothe.  It is such an important skill for them to have.  For me, I could tell when my DD was in pain from teething so I knew I had to pick her up or when not to.

     

    Good luck..it can be so hard sometimes...but it will get better!

    Me: 29, ok
    DH: 31, dx severe MFI..low everything
    IVF with ICSI only option
    First IVF-Oct 2011 ER 10/27/2011 12R, 10M, 8F
    ET 10/30/2011 1 perfect embie
    Beta 11/14/2011-BFFN
    FET #1- Transferred 2 embryos (8 cell and morula)-BFN
    Diagnosed with Hypothyroidism-Synthroid-helped levels after 6 weeks
    FET#2- Transferred 3 embryos (2-6cell, 1-7 cell) Beta: 3/29/12....BFN
    2nd fresh ivf-May 2012
    Changed protocol to add Luveris
    ER 05/27/2012 8R 6M 4F ET 05/30/2012 2embryos 9 cell and 6 cell
    Beta 06/12/12 @13dp3dt - BFP 116
    Second beta 06/18/2012 @ 1579
    1st ultrasound 06/20 saw GS and Yolk sac
    2nd ultrasound 06/29 heartbeat 120 bpm @ 6 weeks 4 days
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  • ccamccam
    5000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
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    edited November 2013

    DS was having trouble during the middle of the night where he wasn't hungry, but couldn't fall back asleep without one of us rocking him.  We ferberized when DS was 5 months, so it's going to be different, but here are my tips, for what it's worth... 

    1)  Buy the book!  Although we didn't follow it exactly because I really believe that only you will know exactly how your LO will handle it, there are great tips for specific situations you might be in.

    2)  Be consistent once you start because, if not, the crying really will be for nothing.

    3)  Make sure you and your SO are both on the same page. 

    4)  Try and do it during a long weekend or while you guys will all be home.  It might be a few rought nights for everyone.

    I don't know that sleep training while she is teething would be the best time either.  When DS is sick, teething, etc., all of our Ferber methods go out the window. 

    ETA:  I also agree with the nightlight and lovey.  DS uses a burp cloth as a lovey that only stays in his crib.  He rubs it all over his face when he's falling asleep and finds it in the middle of the night to cuddle with :)

    ___________________________________________________________________________

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  • So Ferber recommends not sleep training while sick or teething. I highly recommend reading his book. Even if you don't plan to CIO, he explains a lot about sleep patterns and sleep associations. I know a lot of people hear Ferber and think it's just leaving your baby to cry. But it's not. He has different methods for all different issues and situations.
    Are you giving Tylenol or anything for the teething pain?
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • @TJ1979 - We have been giving Motrin. In the beginning the Oragel Natural teething tablets worked wonders - then they stopped helping, and we were using Tylenol. Then that seemed to not touch it, now we're onto Motrin - which worked wonders the first couple of times but is not only getting us 4 hours or so.

    Question for you - the teething necklaces, can they be worn at bedtime?


    "I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love, I"m still looking up."
    TTC #1 since August 2011 MFI Diagnosis - April 2012
    IVF #1 - July 2012 - Stims start 7/2, ER 7/12, 20 retrieved, 16 mature, 13 fertilized!
    ET - 7/17 - 1 blast transferred. Beta - 7/26 273, Beta 2 7/30 - 1143. Beta 3 8/6 - 11,597
    12/25 - Santa tells us "IT'S A GIRL!" EDD - April 4th

    Our Little Easter Bunny has arrived!

    Molly Mildred born 03/31/13


    TTC A Sibling....... FET #1 11/14/14, Transferred one beautiful blast

    Remaining four frosties arrested due to "embryologist error"

    Plllllleasssee stick little icicle.....Beta 11/23...BFN

    Starting ALL over with a fresh IVF cycle

    Stims start 11/28/14, ER December 10th, 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, only 4 fertilized 

    1 Blast Transferred on December 15th..... Beta Christmas Eve... Please Santa, bring me a baby!

    Beta #1 345.....Beta #2....750/ First U/S 1/13/15/HB 131....EDD 9/2/2015

  • We do. If you are worried about choking, you can double it around the ankle and put a sock over it for night time. E has slept in hers once her first tooth came in though.
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • I echo not trying to change sleep routines when sick or teething. CIO isn't going to work for me, so I've been reading the no cry sleep solution and The baby sleep solution (dr sears). 

    Btw, J wears her teething necklace 24/7 since she was 2-3mo old. And I think if baby sleeps and everyone sleeps, if she happens to be in bed with you....it is only a problem if you have a problem ;) J is very snugly all night ;)

    Hugs and good luck!
    TTC Since 3/2010
    Me-36, Unexplained Infertility, DH-35, all clear
    Clomid 50mg 12/2011 = BFN
    Clomid 100mg 1/2012 = BFN, with Cyst
    IVF #1 Lupron/Menopur/Gonal-f/HCG Trigger
    ER 4/19/12 = 11 retrieved, 6 fertilized,
    ET 4/22/12 = 2 transfered (day 3), remaining 3 weren't good enough to freeze
    Beta 5/3 = BFP, 87 Beta #2 5/7 560.9 Beta #3 5/9 1376.5 First u/s One Baby, 125bpm!
    Second u/s, 176bmp! Kicked over to the OB by the RE at 8w. Team Green!! 
    Baby girl J arrived two weeks early! Born into water, med-free. Hooray for Team Pink!

    TTC #2 - back to the RE, treatment started 12/2014. 

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  • What @Ccam and @TJ1979 said.  Get the Ferber book and read it (I got mine from the library).  Even if you don't want to do CIO, it's still a very useful book that talks about baby's sleep in general.  Since your LO is teething right now, it's the best time to read it, and then you can put it into practice once the teething is over.  

    We did Ferber early on, cuz M was a horrible napper and also a pain to get him to fall asleep at night.  He had regressions every time he was sick, or teething, as well as separation anxiety (also kicked in at 8 months like yours).  But the upside is, after a few rough days and nights, he will go back to his normal nap/sleep routine without us needing to "re-train" him per se.  
    TTC since 10/2008  RE consult 6/2010 Dx:Unexplaied IF

    Failed multiple cycles of Clomid+TI and Clomid+IUI

    3/2011 inj+IUI #1 BFP. 4/2011 missed m/c. 

    Fall 2011 inj+IUI #2&3 BFN

    Jan/Feb 2012 IVF#1 BFP 2/23  EDD 10/31/2012 ~~~ Halloween ~~~

    Our IVF miracle, Baby Boy M, arrived on 11/8/2012!
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  • Probably a stupid question but I just want to make sure, the lovie is not a choking hazard, correct?


    "I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love, I"m still looking up."
    TTC #1 since August 2011 MFI Diagnosis - April 2012
    IVF #1 - July 2012 - Stims start 7/2, ER 7/12, 20 retrieved, 16 mature, 13 fertilized!
    ET - 7/17 - 1 blast transferred. Beta - 7/26 273, Beta 2 7/30 - 1143. Beta 3 8/6 - 11,597
    12/25 - Santa tells us "IT'S A GIRL!" EDD - April 4th

    Our Little Easter Bunny has arrived!

    Molly Mildred born 03/31/13


    TTC A Sibling....... FET #1 11/14/14, Transferred one beautiful blast

    Remaining four frosties arrested due to "embryologist error"

    Plllllleasssee stick little icicle.....Beta 11/23...BFN

    Starting ALL over with a fresh IVF cycle

    Stims start 11/28/14, ER December 10th, 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, only 4 fertilized 

    1 Blast Transferred on December 15th..... Beta Christmas Eve... Please Santa, bring me a baby!

    Beta #1 345.....Beta #2....750/ First U/S 1/13/15/HB 131....EDD 9/2/2015

  • We also Ferbered with DS. Like PPs I highly recommend reading his book, even if you decide not to use his sleep training method. I would also wait until teething is done before trying any sort if sleep training. I know it is frustrating. DS didn't STTN until after he turned one. We did Ferber at 6 months but I left a 3 am feeding at that point and he didn't drop it until around 13 months. Some sort if white noise will probably help with sleep. For DS the magic trick was his room temperature. It turns out we were keeping his room too hot (It was the winter time.) When we cooled it off to be about 68 degrees he instantly slept better.
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    After two Clomid cycles, three injectable IUI cycles, two IVFs, two miscarriages, and one lap surgery, IVF #2 has brought us our little boy!

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    After months of being postponed or cancelled, FET #1.3 (Natural FET) brought us twin girls!

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  • I'm not sure if my advice will be helpful. I bought Dr. Ferber's book and transitioned all 3 babies from our bed to the crib at 3 mo. I have a sleep sheep in there, so they do have a little bit of a crutch, but they all sleep well through the night before they wake up to feed. DD sleeps so long already that I am often waking up before her because I need to nurse and can';t wait any longer. Even though they start out with the sleep sheep they are able to self sooth well enough during the night that they are only waking when they are hungry, not because they are coming out of a sleep cycle.

    I can't remember what happened during teething. My guess is the slept through it, but if not I probably just brought them back to bed to urse through it.
    Married 9-4-04

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  • JBDamonM said:
    Probably a stupid question but I just want to make sure, the lovie is not a choking hazard, correct?
    Not a stupid question. No, a lovey is not a choking hazard. 
    TTC since 10/2008  RE consult 6/2010 Dx:Unexplaied IF

    Failed multiple cycles of Clomid+TI and Clomid+IUI

    3/2011 inj+IUI #1 BFP. 4/2011 missed m/c. 

    Fall 2011 inj+IUI #2&3 BFN

    Jan/Feb 2012 IVF#1 BFP 2/23  EDD 10/31/2012 ~~~ Halloween ~~~

    Our IVF miracle, Baby Boy M, arrived on 11/8/2012!
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  • Thanks Ladies!

    I have two "lovies" that I am going to start using.....

    We did much better last night - only woke up four times. All of which she was back to sleep in less than 5 minutes, and 3 of which all I had to do was turn her "friends" back on (seahorse and sleep sheep).....

    I did put Oragel on her gums last night - just the smallest amount.....I've hesitated but was desperate..... Not sure if that's what helped or not.... I can also now feel a small bump starting under her upper gum (I think anyways) so hopefully we're on the way to better nights.

    Thanks for the insight - I am going to get the Ferber book next week. Once the teething is done I know that we need to start working on self soothing.


    "I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love, I"m still looking up."
    TTC #1 since August 2011 MFI Diagnosis - April 2012
    IVF #1 - July 2012 - Stims start 7/2, ER 7/12, 20 retrieved, 16 mature, 13 fertilized!
    ET - 7/17 - 1 blast transferred. Beta - 7/26 273, Beta 2 7/30 - 1143. Beta 3 8/6 - 11,597
    12/25 - Santa tells us "IT'S A GIRL!" EDD - April 4th

    Our Little Easter Bunny has arrived!

    Molly Mildred born 03/31/13


    TTC A Sibling....... FET #1 11/14/14, Transferred one beautiful blast

    Remaining four frosties arrested due to "embryologist error"

    Plllllleasssee stick little icicle.....Beta 11/23...BFN

    Starting ALL over with a fresh IVF cycle

    Stims start 11/28/14, ER December 10th, 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, only 4 fertilized 

    1 Blast Transferred on December 15th..... Beta Christmas Eve... Please Santa, bring me a baby!

    Beta #1 345.....Beta #2....750/ First U/S 1/13/15/HB 131....EDD 9/2/2015

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