Back from vacation, total breakdown.

diamante1181

As some of you may know, we went to Puerto Rico this past week. It was mostly a nice time, no one asked questions about what happened (thank God). It was also nice to not have physical reminders of having been pregnant ("oh the last time I was here @ xyz place I was x weeks pg, etc"). My dad and my brother were in charge of taking care of my beast (the cat) while we were gone. We got home a few hours ago, and we see that the engraved photo frame we just got of the babies was not only moved out of place, their urns were also moved, and the frame was smudged with fingerprints. Total breakdown. I texted my brother, asking if he or my dad touched the frame and things, as they were (slight as it may have been) out of place, and tainted with fingerprints. My brother responded that he did, and that he was sorry. I was crying hysterically. I felt so violated, I felt like my son and daughter were hurt in some way (impossible but still). I felt like, how could he touch/move their things, and then not even put them back as I had left them? As if it was an insignificant photo like any other. Being in my house does not give another the right to touch one's things without permission or knowledge! It is so disrespectful to their memory for that to have happened, and then to come home to it like that. It really hurt deep down. It is bad enough to not have Sophie and Gabriel around, and today makes 4 weeks exactly since their birth. I don't think my brother realized the damage it would cause me emotionally. I didn't respond anything to him. It made me feel so small. I don't know how else to handle this. I of course cleaned the frame and dusted the urns immediately. I guess I'll have to buy a glass case next so others can get the hint. Don't mess with my babies! I guess that's my vent.

stefuge

I'm so sorry, that had to be so upsetting. I feel so protective of all of Colton's things, I have a hard time just sharing them with people, even family, and I'm so sorry that he felt he could just help himself and not have more respect.

irons633

I am so sorry Hun! I was thinking about you this evening wondering how your trip went. I am so sorry that you had to come back home to that. Hugs dear!!!

kz's_girlygirl

First, I am glad that you and  DH were able to have some fun on your trip, and that you got to have a break from things for a little bit. 

Second, I am so sorry about what happened upon your arrival home   I can definitely see how you would feel upset, and that the sacred space you have created to Sophie and Gabriel has been violated. 

When my MIL was visiting in the days after Jesse was born, she opened up the memory box and was looking through it while I was sleeping.  My mom (who was also staying with us) told me when I got up, and it almost made me sick to my stomach.  I didn't say anything though.  I tried to think of it as her wanting to know about her grandson, since she won't mention him at all or even acknowledge that he died or was born.

I hope that you are able to feel that their space is safe again, and that they are perfectly OK.  Lots of hugs to you as you get back into the routine of being home. 

mingaling2

I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how violated you feel right now. I'm just so sorry.

diamante1181

Thank you all. It really did devastate me last night. In the scheme of things, perhaps this was a small thing. I guess it is so raw still, so fresh, that I am ill-equipped to handle these curveballs of grief. Today was much better, though. We did normal things, went out for breakfast, groceries, etc.  I have yet to cry today, but I'm sure that will make an appearance some time before bed.

VyD81

I'm sorry that you had to come home to that. I understand, Sophie and Gabriel are precious babies and their things are sacred. I'm glad today is better for you.