Second time moms- be honest what does labor feel like

morganmej

I know there is probably no mental preparation possible- but I just want to know- is it terrible?

ncbelle

I mean it hurts a lot but it doesn't compare to anything else I've experienced. And really I can't really remember exactly! Both of my labors were med free...and I've signed up to do it again so it can't be that bad . It helps to think of it as pain with a purpose vs. just pain.

magentawarped

It sucks, but it wasn't unbearable for me. I declined the epidural. It all depends on your pain threshold.

sunnidazze12

For me it was the worst pain I've ever experienced. I opted for epidural after 22 hours in labor. This go around I plan on getting epidural immediately.

KariB509

I agree with PP. I thought it was the worst pain I've ever experienced and it was getting unbearable right before I got the epidural. After the epidural though, I was quickly over it and it was smooth sailing until then.
This is not to deter you from med free labor and delivery though. I believe every woman experiences labor differently, has different pain tolerances, etc. I was just being honest about my experience.

imakeeff0rts

My entire labor was pitocin-induced because I had two very serious medical conditions that required inductions. You wanted honest, so I'm going to give it to you: It fucking sucked. Fortunately, I blocked a lot of it out of mind. It wasn't completely horrible, though, because I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

erbear

It's not terrible. It hurts, but you know mentally there's an end so it was bearable. I remember counting during contractions because I knew they weren't lasting more than 90 seconds - you'll develop a coping mechanism. People do it every day.

CactusGirl

My labor was super quick so I didn't have any real bad pain or problems there (water broke, got to hospital, was ready to push!). Since I was already at 9 cm when I got to the hospital, I ended up doing it med-free. I have to say that pushing was the hardest part. You just push and push and it feels like nothing is happening! (seriously, isn't the baby just right there?! Shouldn't he/she just pop right out?!). So pushing was hard for me, but not painful, just super uncomfortable and tiring.

I did have to get an episiotomy, which at the time wasn't bad, but the healing process sucked. Overall it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, however, my total labor was 2.5 hours, so I think I had it pretty easy. 

kalette

It just felt like pressure with an epi. No pain.

ktpaladino

It was difficult for me because I progressed very quickly. I went from contractions that I considered pretty mild to contractions that were off the charts they were so strong, in a matter of an hour. So I was a bit in shock and I opted for an epidural because I was afraid of passing out from the pain....and I consider myself to have a high pain threshold! Once I got the epi, it was a PIECE OF CAKE.

Eahen42

i was induced and received no epi. honestly, it was painful but not nearly as bad as i thought it was going to be. all the horror stories i heard freaked me out. ignore people's stories. everyone has a different experience. if you stay in control of your body it's totally doable. plus, laboring in water helps a lot. i did tear a little and that burned like crazy, but again, not as bad as i thought. i thought the worse part was pushing for over 2 hours. it was exhausting.

 i hope to be 100% drug free this time around.

Laura_Elaine

All three of mine have been med free... and I'm back again! I think I can best describe it as breathtaking. With my first, I was hyperventilating and literally forgot how to breath and needed DHs help. It is tiring and you want it to end, and it will. Keep in mind my first labor was my longest, at 6 hours from the start ofcontractions to birth, with #2 and #3 being about 2-2.5 hours each. So... my body does a lot of work in a short time, but I'm not sure if that's "easier" than a longer labor...

I'll risk being hated, but my first words after my last were "that wasn't so bad" so maybe it gets easier with practice? The after pains were non-existant with #1 and #2, and really hurt with #3, and I've been told they onky get worse with each successive kid. She was sunny-side up, too, and I didn't have any back labor!

I was told by a friend (a doctor's wife) that the brain does not have receptors or whatever they're called ti remember pain... so women may have emotions and all that tied to their labor stories, but they don't actually remember the pain.

PrimRoseMama

Menstrual cramps from hell.

Eahen42

I wanted to add that you can mentally prepare yourself. As far as what to expect and how to handle certain situations. Of course, things can change in a matter of seconds. I don't know if you're planning a med free birth or not, but if you are considering it, read read read! It is so empowering. I read tons and tons of med-free birth stories and my worries vanished. Check out this website it's awesome https://birthwithoutfearblog.com/

bjgonzales1217

PMS cramps on steroids lol.  BUT even though it is the most terrible pain I have gone through, it was a pain with a purpose! It was a happy pain…if that makes sense. lol.  I ended up going about 9 hours through my 16 hour labor without an epidural, then I couldn't take it anymore lol.  I plan on going again with the epidural but i do want to feel the contractions for a little bit….idk maybe I'm weird lol

Everyones pain tolerance is different.  Keep in mind its not unbearable, because if it was, the zillions and zillions of women before us wouldn't have been able to do it lol

DTNZ4Ever

My water broke and I had no contractions on my own. So I was put on pitocin. I requested my epidural early on to take the edge off. It wasn't horrible however I didn't realize how much pain I was in until after the epidural and then it was no pain after that. I felt nothing during pushing and the worst part was that the epidural ran out when my doctor was stitching me up.

mcgeeva

Had an emergency c-section wasn't bad at all! Don't remember anything really but I never cried from pain and was up and walking at the hospital.

TessC1991

I had twins my first pregnancy and both were born natural. I pushed for just over an hour and they came 19 mins. apart. The hardest part for me was feeling like I wasn't doing anything when I was (pushing). I had no choice but to get an epidural and I got that just 5 mins before I had to push so I can't say it helped me in any way. The only reason I took it was because if I needed a C then I could be awake. Otherwise they would've put me under. The worst part of birth to me is the soreness afterwards. Pushing didn't hurt like I thought. Shortly after having my boys I had to get a couple of teeth pulled and I compared that to having children. The healing process for a pulled tooth is obviously much faster than a womans private parts. But if I had to choose I would rather give birth than get a tooth pulled! Seriously that is more painful!

thatgirlnicki

I remember saying to my husband, "I feel like I'm dying" and then I got an epidural and that was amazing.  The pain was really bad (for me) - I do believe that everybody experiences it differently.  I also don't think we can really remember pain.  After the birth, I remember thinking I didn't want to go through that again any time soon (it's also exhausting), but I wasn't so traumatized that I didn't get pregnant again!

I did have a kidney stone about 3 months after my son was born. That was also incredibly painful, but I think the labor pain was worse.  Still, I'd take the labor pain again over the kidney stone because it has such positive associations - the only pain I've ever experienced with such a happy ending!

kggMom

Everyone has a different situation.  My labor and delivery actually wasn't that bad.  But I had an epi and for SURE will do it again this time.  I was in labor for a long time but only pushed maybe 3 times.  The worst part for me was the exhaustion, not pain.  Good luck! 

rowanthefrog

Yes. It hurts. More than you can really imagine. But it ends and you will have a baby at the end of it. I like the way Ina May gaskin describes it, "an interesting sensation that requires all of my attention." If you focus on how PAINFUL it is then you will mostly feel the pain. If you focus on what its actually doing for you (opening your cervix so you can have your baby) then you will realize how PRODUCTIVE it is. I'm not saying the pain will go away, it won't, but the pain has a purpose.

There are lots of options out there if you need pain relief!

A

Megs1HOTRED

Like getting hit by a train  LOL, j/k!  It's really not so bad.

I ended up with pitocin, which I do believe is the devil's drug, and was in so much pain from that, but if it hadn't been for that I think I could have handled going med-free.  Before the pitocin I was feeling completely fine; 20 minutes after getting it I was begging for an epidural.  Then I was back to being fine.    

LEIGHLOVE09

I had pitocin and got an epidural at 3cm...it wasn't too bad up until then. I pretty much rocked on an exercise ball the whole time which I think helped. After epi I slept through most of it. It was the middle of the night. I woke up feeling like I had to poop which is just the baby coming and I pushed for 20 min. I didn't feel much pain really because of the epi. It's a very cloudy experience because of the drugs and it being the middle of the night and all but it went way better than I was expecting it to go. I hope this one is just the same!

zou bisou

FWIW, I've been told that passing a kidney stone hurts more.

iverske9

It starts out crampy and gets progressively worse...I was not screaming but I only made it to 7 cm before asking for a epidural. It hurt but it is for a reason and then I gained relief from the epidural. My sister did not have drugs and while she said it hurt like hell she had a baby in the end. Millions of women do it and there are options for relief if you so choose to. Its ok to be nervous but it will be worth it. Why else would mothers choose to do it a second time, LOL

SGC29

Every experience is different. I found it to be very painful, but I also opted to have an epidural and that helped tremendously IMO. My contractions started out slow and steady each time and as they became closer together and longer in length they became much more painful. For me, it was a lot of pelvic pressure, lower back pain, extreme cramping, and pain that eventually radiated through my legs and up into my upper body. Once I received my epidural I was pain free within half an hour. 

I found recovery to be much much better than I had anticipated though. But again, everyone is different. 

Eahen42

zou bisou said:

FWIW, I've been told that passing a kidney stone hurts more.

Every part of having kidney stones is worse than labor. Take it from someone who has had to deal with kidney stones 3 times in the past 2 years... and had a epi-free labor/birth. I'd take labor over a kidney stone any day.

Miles2Go

I would describe mine as an uncomfortable sensation unique to childbirth. Very little of what I felt I would qualify as pain. AND you get breaks between contractions. Even if it is only 4 minutes, 1 minute, 30 seconds...they made a difference for me. There were two moments I found painful - a contraction while I was trying to get out of the tub and therefore out of my zone, and crowning. Transition was intensely challenging, but not undo-able. I don't think there are any words to describe it accurately for you. You just have to experience it yourself. Try to not be scared, trust your body, trust your doc. Every labor is different, as you can see by all these responses. I'm actually kind of looking forward to doing it again!

InLovewSB

I labored unmedicated for about 20 hrs before I ended with a CSection for my son.  Labor starts out with mild contractions, those get worse until you can't talk through them, those get worse until you can't move through them, those get worse until you can't think through them and you just breathe and sway and moan. Take your class or read your book so you know your breathing techniques and you know some physical pain management you can do (like counter pressure, swaying, warm bath/shower), then when the contraction comes, you can mentally handle it. You intensely focus on each breath, that it's an outward push of pain away from you, think about how it feels coming from deep in your lungs and feels going back in, just focus so much on the breath that it's all you see and the pain is diminished. It really worked for me, that and my H digging his thumbs into my lower back for counter pressure.

And when it's all done, you feel freaking STRONG. It's amazing... to know you made it through that pain and your beautiful blessing is here in your arms. It's just, it's immediately less in your mind than it really was. You forget how intense, how terrible, because it's done and you made it through with your baby.

pigtails1031777

Of course it sucks! You're pushing a watermelon out a hole the size of a lemon

Khedges07

I always say think of that bad belly pain u get when u have a food poisoning stomach bug.........to me it's like that but 10 times worse!!!!!
Good thing tho once baby is out, that's it! Done & dusted, no pain! (Well apart from the obvious sore bits down below lol!)

frasey

Honestly it wasn't as bad as I was anticipating. DD was 3 wks early, so I wasn't even ready for it. It sucked, hell yeah. But not bad enough to make me never want to do it again! I was fearing the worst but I never felt like I needed anything for the pain. I hope and pray that this delivery is just as 'easy'.

jjones59

Yes it did hurt, but I honestly feel like it was so foggy not like I can go back and remember it all. I remember the hospital wanting to send me home because they weren't sure how far I was until they checked me and I was 5 cm. It just felt blurry the whole time. 

klgallup

I normally wouldn't scare you but you asked. My labor was like and exorcism. My labor was intense from the start. My water broke and my contractions were 2 1/2 minutes apart from the start. I was vomiting and shitting myself every contraction. I wanted an epidural but due to shitty hospital issues i didn't get mine for 6 hours. By then, I was fully dialated and ready to push. I pushed for three hours. I was exhausted. I ended up with a c section because DS was stuck in my pelvis.

Not all labors are like this. I hope yours is so much better. I think the only reason I am ready to have another is that I am not a VBAC candidate and get to just skip to the c section this time.

jasrun80

mine really wasn't bad,,, but I did get my epidural like ten minutes before I pushed so I was very numb & that was awesome!!!
the cramps that got me there were tough but short for me,, here's a link to my blog post on my first labor story!

https://cloverwillrun.com/2013/08/22/my-labor-story-baby-will/

vszapp

I think it totally depends on the position of the baby, as well as your anatomy.

HARLEYSMOM2010

I went med free both times and you literally forget the pain until it happens again it's paralyzing when you contract at about 7+ cm dialated ... It really sucks I don't know feels kind of like you stomach is being electrocuted lol and the worst part is you don't know when it will end... But it does thank god and as SOON as baby is out your pain free and forget everything to so with the pain ... But seriously I'm going for round three so it can't be ThAT bad!!! Hope that helped haha

desertmouse39

I also had to be induced with pitocin but really wanted to deliver without an epidural.  We utilized a doula which was extremely helpful.  I don't have anything else to compare my labor to, and it was definitely the most painful thing I've ever done but it was also very cool to experience it all, and I felt like my body came up with a lot of different coping things to get us through - sometimes I almost felt like I was on drugs!  For me, transition was a total beast and then pushing, although exhausting, wasn't that painful.  I hope to go epi-free this time too, and if I don't need to be induced, I'm hoping it will be even easier without the pitocin factor.

I would urge you not to be scared- no matter how your birth turns out, you can do this, your body is made to do it, and you will feel incredible holding your baby!!!

MyNameWasTaken

It feels like menstrual cramps on steroids. The beginning contractions weren't that bad, definitely no big deal; they progressively got more painful and intense, but again, it wasn't unbearable. Transition was about a bitch and a half, pushing was a walk in the park in comparison, though the ring of fire is no joke. They say that the memory of the pain fades; it hasn't for me. But I had a very positive and happy experience, and I'm going med-free again.

I will say this: position made ALL THE DIFFERENCE in the level of pain I had. Walking, swaying, and staying on me feet? Tolerable. Laying down, squatting, getting on my hands and knees? The worst fucking pain I've ever experienced, and I wanted all of the drugs at those moments. There is absolutely no way on this side of hell I will ever consider a med-free birth if I cannot have the freedom to move.

MapleLeafMama

Of course it hurts. But everyone's pain threshold is different. I was induced and was on a drip to induce contractions, and they had to turn it down at one point so they weren't as intense.  Then my epi 1/2 worked.  But I think, like others have said, because you know it's going to end, it's bearable.  Once the baby was out, it was instant relief.  I mean INSTANT.  

Lovenyc

For me, it started like the intense cramping you get right before a bout of diarrhea. It got increasingly worse. Like the worst case of cramping you have ever had in your life x10000. Unfortunately, my epidural didn't work very well so the pain quickly turned to incredible pressure.

Here's the thing though...as bad as that sounds, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.