Trying to Get Pregnant

child spacing

For those of you who have more than one child what is the age gap between your children? If you don't have kids yet but plan to have more than one, how far apart would you like them to be? After originally thinking we were one and done I did a complete 180 to wanting 2 under 2 but my ute didn't cooperate. Curious to see the spacing others have or want.

Re: child spacing

  • What @Emerald27 said. Planning your child spacing is easier said than done.  If my plans would have worked out, I would have a 4 month old right now.

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  • Really wanted two under two but DH wasn't game. DS just turned two so I'm hoping for 2 under 3 but who knows what will happen.
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  • My SIL did 2 under 2 but my brother and I are 3 1/2 years apart. We've always been super close so I think I would like about a 3 year gap but we will see what happens. We're leaving that decision up to God.
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  • Mine are 2 mins apart :P

    I originally wanted about a 2-2.5 year gap between my children. DH wanted 2u2. I guess he got his way. We have recently decided to go for #3 so we are going to start trying Feb/Apr 2014 (depending on how my physio is going for my back).


    msteacher83hullabalou[Deleted User]
  • I wanted them to be about 3 years apart, but going to end up closer to 5 years apart. And that's how things go!

    Mio Marito per Sempre: Married 2009. SD is 12 yrs. DD is 4 yrs.

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  • jchickiem said:

    What @Emerald27 said. Planning your child spacing is easier said than done.  If my plans would have worked out, I would have a 4 month old right now.


    I agree with @Emerald27 too. I never wanted my children this far apart, but I can't control that.

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    BFP #1: 6/25/09 EDD 2/13/10 @ 6 weeks- Saw HB @ 9 weeks - DS born 2/11/10 (39w5d)
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  • We don't have any yet...I only want One..hubby wants Two....I wanted 4-5years apart..I'm 32 so that wont happen...probably will have 2 under 2..eek! But my uterus needs to cooperate and bake at least one
  • I wanted them 3 years apart. Then I lost my job. So I hoped for 4 years. Then I had a Miscarriage. Now I just hope to have two at all.
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  • If I do have another child, my children will be  about 18 years apart.  For the longest, I thought one and done. Well, now...
    Don't worry, I'm working on it. 

  • I wanted then maybe 2.5 years apart. But life got in the way, then same here, my Ute hasn't cooperated. No matter what we do they will be over 3 years apart. I don't mind. I just want another one.

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  • beckynsean11beckynsean11 member
    5000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    edited November 2013
    I was hoping for 2 years between them. This was back when I naively thought this was a fast & easy process. Realistically, we'll probably start trying for #2 as soon as we are allowed after #1 is here. 

       Me: IR-PCOS, elevated DHEAs, low progesterone, weak ovulation  DH: low volume, low T
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  • 1 & 2 are 3.5 years apart.  Depending on when I get pregnant, 2 & 3 will be 3.5 to 4 years apart.
    I was young when I had my first though (24) so I've had plenty of time to space them out.
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  • I was hoping for 2 years between them. This was back when I naively thought this was a fast & easy process. Realistically, we'll probably start trying for #2 as soon as we are allowed after #1 is here. 

    That part of the statement, definitely. Our number right now is that we'd like 4 and I would like to be done having kids by 36 or 37 (Originally 35, but I don't think that will happen). We've been trying 12 months and 2 losses for #1 and I turn 30 in a little over a month. So, assuming that I can get pregnant and carry to term without too much intervention, one of those numbers will probably have to give. Especially if it takes as long for each kid as it has for one. I've always said I'd love to stairstep my kids, but I don't know that will happen.

    If we end up needing fertility treatments or having to grow our family in a different way, that will drastically change how this goes down.

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  • We have one so far. He is 20 months. I wanted a 2 year age difference, but that didn't happen. So now we are hoping for 2.5-3 year difference. Ultimately, we really aren't in control and are leaving it in God's hands.
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  • Mine are 30 seconds apart, which was not planned, like @megs2011 :) We started TTC #3 as soon as my period came back because I'd like to get diapers and infancy all over with ASAP, but my body had other plans so we will see. Hoping for a less than three year age gap between 2 and 3.
    BFP #1 12.9.11 - welcomed G & S 7.20.12
    BFP #2 9.20.13 - m/c 10.21.13
    BFP #3 12.15.13  due 8.29.14



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  • DD is adopted, so we had no control over that 8 year gap.  But it's awesome.  She is old enough to help out, but young enough that they still play together.  After DS, we thought 18mo spacing would be nice (loool), so we went off BC as soon as my OB gave us the green light.  When that didn't happen, we thought, "Hey, at least we'll get 2u2!"  I've been off BC for 16 months now... not even an evap this whole time.  :\  DS will likely turn 2 before I get a BFP due to my current testing schedule.

    I thought I'd like #2 and #3 super close, then #4 3-4 years after that, but it's taking so long to have #3 that who knows if I'll even get to #4.
  • I love the idea of close in age kids. All of my cousins that were born one right after the other are SO close. My siblings and I have always been in different life stages at different times. I'm hoping when they reach the age where they want to have a family that our families will be close!

    I think 1-2 year gap is perfect, but who know what nature has in store. We are working on #1!
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  • I second what @beckynsean11 said about trying for #2 pretty much right away. I want at least two and maybe three kids and I'm 34, at this point won't be giving birth until 35. So it's pretty much go ASAP. That's just the way it's working out!
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  • The more I'm learning about my body and TTC the more I'm sure nothing goes to plan.  Anyways it doesn't mean we aren't still planning.  DH and I want 3 or 4 kids.  Well DH actually wants 6 or 7 but that's a big hell no from me.  In an ideal world I'd be done having kids by the time I'm 38.  Well we're just starting to TTC right when I turned 29....and I"d like my first to be less than 2 years apart.  However, all of that really depends on my career and how things are moving along (plus of course money).  Then I'd like to wait about three years before having another two under three.  

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  • We thought we were one and done, then changed our minds this summer. So our kids will be at *least* five years apart, probably more unless I get pregnant very soon. I originally wanted three kids, all two years apart. But when DD was two there is NO WAY I could have handled two.
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  • I would like no more than a 3 year gap between them and I want 3 children. DH is leaning more towards two LO's and wants them closer in age. DH and
    B-I-L are 16 months apart so I think DH wants something similar to that age gap. My sister and I are 2 1/2 years apart and I liked it growing up.
  • I am going to see how #1 goes, assuming I am lucky enough to get a #1.  But, if all goes well, I'd probably start trying for #2 when #1 is about 18ish months.  We'll see what happens.

    My sister and I are 3 years apart and are very close.
  • I have a stepdaughter. When we started TTC she was almost 4 and we thought a 4-5 years would be fine. But two years later we are moving to IVF and I'm just hopeful for a 6-7 year age gap.

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  • Our boys are exactly 22 months apart.  We wanted them around 2 years apart, and that's what we got!  I like the spacing so far. 

    For #3 though, we purposely waited to TTC to have them a little farther apart than the first two.  I think because it's baby #3, I want my 2nd to be a little older when a new baby comes.  I guess try to make it a LITTLE easier to manage! 

    If I get pregnant this cycle baby#2 and #3 will be 28 months apart.


    son#1 born 6/2010

    son#2 born 4/2012

    son#3 born 7/2014

  • I just want a second child.
    BFP #1 4/6/09; EDD 12/6/09; miscarriage 4/10/09..............BFP #2 5/3/09; DD born 1/9/10........BFP #3 12/15/12, EDD 8/31/13; baby stopped growing at 5w3d; natural miscarriage..........BFP #4 2/8/13, EDD 10/20/13; missed miscarriage discovered 9w2d; d/c.......BFP #5 10/22/13, EDD 7/8/13; miscarriage 10/28/13..... BFP #6 11/19/13; DS born 7/29/14 {\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252 {\fonttbl\f0\fswiss\fcharset0 Helvetica;} {\colortbl;\red255\green255\blue255;\red51\green51\blue51;\red255\green255\blue255;} \deftab720 \pard\pardeftab720\sl280\partightenfactor0 \f0\fs22 \cf2 \cb3 \expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0 \outl0\strokewidth0 \strokec2 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker} {\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252 {\fonttbl\f0\fswiss\fcharset0 Helvetica;} {\colortbl;\red255\green255\blue255;\red51\green51\blue51;\red255\green255\blue255;} \deftab720 \pard\pardeftab720\sl280\partightenfactor0 \f0\fs22 \cf2 \cb3 \expnd0\expndtw0\kerning0 \outl0\strokewidth0 \strokec2 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker}
  • RayRay007RayRay007 member
    10000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    edited November 2013
    Before kids, I wanted them 2.5 years apart. Then when it came time to get pg with no. 2, I wasn't ready. When I was ready, we got pg and they were to be 3 years apart. And that pg didn't work out. Now I'm hoping they'll be about 3.5 years apart. I don't really want them 4-5 years apart, and I don't even like the idea of having them 3.5 years apart, but sometimes shit happens. 

    Don't invest too much in the idea of having the perfect amount of space between kids. 

    That being said, I wouldn't recommend having children much closer than 2 years. 


    bfp#4 3/19/2014 edd 12/1/2014 please let this be the one!

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  • I thought a 2-3 year age gap would be ideal, but that doesn't seem to be working out.  Right now we are looking at a 4 year age gap and I'm realizing that won't be too bad. DS will be in school and at an age where he will be able to help instead of hinder.  Also, having only one in diapers at a time sounds wonderful!
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  • I always said 3-4 years was a good gap. That's what me and my next youngest sibling are and it worked out quite nicely. Close enough in age to still have similar interests and could play together...but far enough to not be identical. My DS is 3 years and we are now TTC #2. Hopefully we have as much luck as we did TTC him (2 cycles). We are entering cycle #2 now... ;)
                                                                             Me: 28  H: 28  DS: 4
    [TTC Since October 2013] [ BFP 1.27.15  EDD: 10.8.15]
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  • We have a 9 year old and a 4 week old! My 9 year old is a great big sister to her baby brother. She is such a huge help and she enjoys being a big sister. She always asking what she can do to help. She likes helping with changing diapers, pushing the stroller, and she loves singing to him. I was a little afraid that she would have issues with a new baby in the family since she has been the only child for so long, but thankfully she is just as happy and excited to have him as mommy and daddy are! :)
  • I have a 20 yr old one that's going to be 15 next month and I'm trying to start over again.

    Now ..... That's what you call spacing them apart!
    Fucking bump!!!!
  • I thought at one time when my oldest turned 2 I'd start trying.  And then I decided I didn't want anyone in diapers at the same time and now I'm leaning towards starting to try after she turns 3.
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  • Our plan all along has been at least a three year gap. I'm ready now, but DH isn't just yet. I'm not going to badger him, but I've told him I'm open for the conversation if he ever wants to have it. I will take the time to chart and learn a bit more about my cycle!

    I'm very ok with waiting, but our "almost oops" last cycle was more exciting and CD1 was more disappointing than I thought it would be.
  • I wanted then maybe 2.5 years apart. But life got in the way, then same here, my Ute hasn't cooperated. No matter what we do they will be over 3 years apart. I don't mind. I just want another one.
    This... exactly 
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  • There is 2 years between 1 & 2 and will be 3 years between 2 & 3. There wouldn't have been as much space between the youngest two but I had a couple MC in between.
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  • My girl will be almost 3years apart. My oldest was born April 15th 2011 and this one is due Dec 11th 2013. We planned for them to be atleast 3years apart, but we were blessed to conceive number 2 a little bit earlier than planned. ;)
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