Not as excited as I thought...is something wrong?

mheslup

Hello Ladies,

Back in May 2013, I miscarried identical twins at 10 weeks.  I have taken 3 pregnancy tests since yesterday and they were all positive.  But for some reason, I do not feel as excited as I thought I would be.  By all means, my husband and I have been (kinda) trying, but it does not feel the same. I genuinely am happy that I am pregnant, but that excitement I had is gone. Is something wrong with me, or is this a natural feeling to have after having a miscarriage?

Thank you for your response in advance. 

ksyknelvr73

Nope, totally normal. I hate that we are robbed of that excitement, and I'm sorry you're feeling it right now.

It has been very, very hard for me to get excited this time, even after 3 good ultrasounds. I just never feel okay about things until after the anatomy scan. We are all a bit jaded.

MollySm

Totally normal. I am almost 9 weeks and I still don't really feel connected or like it's real. Hopefully it will come with time and good scans.

aforst

It's very normal.  Everything about this pregnancy is different than my first two.  The naivety is gone.  It sucks, but it is what it is.  Congrats on the BFP!!

OSUWifey09

I agree - it's very normal. It took me almost a week, and peeing on lots of sticks and digi tests, to really believe that I was pregnant. I'm 29.5 weeks now and still have moments of doubt. But congrats on your BFP!

E&B0811

ninthgirl said:

Very normal. I am just about as far along as you are and I preface everything about this pregnancy with "if we get that far."

Yep. This.

Heeb918

Congrats, I hope you have a H&H 9 months! We all feel that way, I have seen my baby multiple times but still can't really believe its in there, doing just fine. Take one day and a time and remember that Today You ARE Pregnant.

SandSunBliss

I'm so sorry but this is normal. We lost identical twins at 16 weeks in February. I'm 11.5 weeks now and just now beginning to feel like this is real and beginning to get excited. I still use "if" and not "when" and I'm still quite guarded. I wish we could all have that same innocent joy we felt before, but unfortunately, we've been on the wrong side of the statistics. I'm so very sorry for your loss and congratulations on your pregnancy. (Hugs)

ktwils2010

Completely normal. After a loss, your innocence and "ignorance is bliss" is gone. Unfortunately, you know exactly what can go wrong and have lived through it. I think we all felt that fear and apprehension. I'm almost 9 weeks and keep thinking "if we make it to this point" "if I make it to my next appointment". I love my baby and feel happy to be pregnant but don't feel excited yet or very connected. I think excitement will come with time and good scans/appointments. Just take it a day at a time and try not to be too hard on yourself, what you are feeling is normal having had your experience. Congrats on your new pregnancy!

MissEricaK

As everyone said, totally normal.  I'm a bit over 7 weeks (with a previous 12 week miscarriage and lost a son at 20 weeks, stillborn) and while I'm so happy to be pregnant, I'm not necessarily excited yet. I need to know that all is OK before I get to that point. I'm sure so many of us can relate to you.

jgreig83

I agree with PP's it is normal. You are no longer naive to what can happen, and that makes getting pregnant again both exciting and scary. You will second guess things, and feel anxious about lack of weight gain, lack of movement and symptoms. It is all normal, but that is what PgAL is here for. Best of luck to you!

delatl

Like others said, totally normal. I'm in my second trimester and still worry all the time. I'm getting more excited but still worried. Hang in there and know it does get easier.

amwangel

ksyknelvr73 said:

Nope, totally normal. I hate that we are robbed of that excitement, and I'm sorry you're feeling it right now.

It has been very, very hard for me to get excited this time, even after 3 good ultrasounds. I just never feel okay about things until after the anatomy scan. We are all a bit jaded.

Same. THIS. I just wrote a post the other day about how I wish I could be as excited as my friends who are pregnant for the first time. 

I'm just too jaded. :-/

SuperKim13

I am in the same boat here.  I think it's normal.  Congratulations on your pregnancy, though!  And (((HUGS)))

becky7683

Totally normal.  I think it's our way of "protecting" ourselves emotionally.  Glad to know I'm not alone! 

MommaAshley12

I feel the same way as you and it makes me sad. I had already started filling out pages in a book and taking bump pictures when my first pregnancy ended at 6 weeks. I'm still hesitant to write anything in my new books just in case this baby doesn't make it and I'm 10 weeks with 2 great appointments. I think it will get better with time. Big ((hugs)). Hope you have a happy, healthy pregnancy!!

AmericanInOz

Normal !!

I MC in May too - and all I can do is worry til my first appt, I'm finding it hard to stay positive and I haven't told anyone, even my close friends *sigh*

I agree witth the pp about this is the way we protect ourselves emotionally

mheslup

Thank you so much for your comments ladies.  I also found that my DH is not too excited either. I think he took the MC harder than me.  I understand that he is trying to protect himself too. We talked about it last night and it just seems like any other thing, not a big issue.  We do not talk about it much.  I understand that we do not want to get too excited, but it is a big deal.  This kinds sucks as well because I am trying to find some excitement somewhere, but that is just not how we feel.  I just have to be positive and look forward to a happy baby.