I feel really anxious about this too. I am more afraid of this than the actual labor part! I am figuring that since most women have more than one child, they somehow must heal enough to go on to have yet another kid! So when I start freaking out, I think about that...
Unfortunately I had a tough time with tearing and a large episiotomy when my son was born 16 years ago but that was down to two things. Firstly I was induced and my son was born within an hour of the suppository being administered. They had to use forceps and a ventouse to prise him out lol. My body was simply not ready according to my midwife, which makes total sense to me as that's what all the hours of labouring are for, right? Secondly I had a HORRIBLE doctor who was rude, impatient and really didn't care. He actually shouted at me for telling him the local anesthetic wasn't working! I had over 30 internal stitches, lord knows how many external and my perineum is one big mess of scar tissue because he messed up. All this because I was induced and then had a crappy doctor stitching me up. Anyway, I know my experience is thankfully not the norm but I would say to anyone about to be stitched up...make sure your doctor knows what he is doing and isn't in a bad mood! And avoid being induced if you can. I'm expecting No3 in July, some 16 years later and even with that bad experience, I'm not worrying myself. Don't sweat it, really. And remember... Dr. Google is NOT your friend!
yaycks! I know my uncle's wife had a C-section and the doctor was iffy, she did the internal stitches but then asked an intern to close her up, her stomach looks horrible still 4 years after the C-section according to her and at the time she suffered severe pain and really bad complications from the stitches being done wrong. that is indeed scary but I try not to think of it.
as to Dr. Google my mom tells me to STOP but he answers me whenever I click the button! I know I should stop but the thing that my mother for instance doesn't get is that I feel more comfortable and assured when I know what would and could happen, and hear stories from you ladies about it and feel well informed because then I'm not adding shock or fear of the absolute unknown to the pains of delivery and I'm less anxious I honestly feel much better now after I've read all the answers to this post than before.