Single Parents

What do I have to look forward too?

I just found out I am 6 weeks pregnant with my exes baby. We broke up after only dating like 2 months, we really weren't more then just friends who occasionally hooked up. Anywho, I just told him and told him he can have an out. I will hold nothing against him. He can not be a dad if he doesn't want too. He said he wants to make it work. We will be friends who raise a baby together.
My question, has anyone had this happen before and it not turn out well ? Any suggestions on what I should do ? I'm 22 and he is 27. I'm in school for my masters and he has a good job. I've started dating a new guy and he's still single (not that that matters)

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Re: What do I have to look forward too?

  • He said "BUT WE ONLY KISSED!!! DID YOU DRUG ME?!" Lol. Such a goof.
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  • For us it didn't work, and now I'm filing for sole custody, but hopefully you two can do better than we did. The two main reasons it didn't work is: communication and expectations. We were on very different pages most of the time and there was many misunderstandings and frustration. But my ex is also pretty immature and he did not step up at all after our son was born even though we were living together. And after I kicked him out in July, he kept insisting he wanted to be involved, but has shown no initiative and gives us no support. So I have raised our son by myself since the beginning, and I don't regret it. Having a half-ass partner who isn't committed is way worse than doing it alone. I am crossing my fingers that you guys can make it work, because I really do wish my son had a better father.

    So my advice would be: 1) Do as much talking and planning now as possible. Sit down and go through all the details of how you will divide all the responsibilities, finances, parenting decisions (health, discipline, education), visitation schedules. EVERYTHING. Talk it all out and write it down now, to avoid unpleasant surprises later. 2)  It is very easy to be excited about the "idea" of a baby, but it's a very, very different story to actually bring a baby home and put in the effort every single day. You won't know how serious the father is about being involved until you witness it yourself. Pay attention to how supportive he is while you're pregnant and consider that a preview of his ability to commit to fatherhood. Hold him accountable and see how he handles it.

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