I just need to vent. My DF and mother are going to be the only 2 in the delivery room. My soon to be mil has made it a point during every conversation to "remind me" she's going to be in the delivery room as well. I have over and over again told her who is going to be in there, made my DF tell her over and over and she still Doesn't get it to the point where she said she will make a scene if she's not allowed. So I have now had to update my birth plan with who's allowed to be there during delivery. Both DF and I have asked her to respect us on our decisions, to which she replied "she's going to do what she wants and nobody's going to stop her"!
Yeah, what ColeRose said. My OB said that if I want someone kept out, just tell the nurses. They'll make up "policies" if need be, and whatever scene she makes will be out of your sight.
You don't have to tell her your in labor. Wait till the baby is born & then put out the call! "Gosh MIL things were so hectic having a baby & all, that we just didn't get the time to call you!" OR yes, the nurses will respect your wishes and turn her down at the doors!
The hospital will get security involved and have her escorted from the premises. It would be a high HIPPA violation/lawsuit for them to allow unwanted people in a patients rooms.
My hospital has the L&D floor locked, so no one is allowed in unless they are allowed by the mother.
Wow. I'm betting she'll be a peach to deal with as LO grows up as well. I say don't give in. She shouldn't receive ANY positive reinforcement for this kind of behavior. Otherwise you'll just see more of it in the future.
Remember, this is YOUR birth experience. She has no say in it.
But just for a fun thought experiment.... I love the idea of her being allowed in for your transition (during which some moms become fierce and have few inhibitions with their words). I delight a little bit in the fantasy about her being allowed in for that and being handed her ass on a platter by you, and then her never even thinking about trying to cross a line with you again. Maybe that could combat the phenomenon that @ mariahbowden describes.
PULL OUT A CAN OF WHOOP ASS CAUSE IT'S TRANSITION TIME!!!!!!!!!!! )
Yikes, have fun with her as your MIL. She'll be super fun as a grandma as well since she is great at respecting wishes! Your wedding should be cool, too.
Set boundaries, this woman sounds nuts.
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I am deathly afraid of this happening to me as my MIL can be a big ol' bag of crazy anytime there is a major life event for me or DH. My mom and I actually talked about this yesterday and My mom is willing to act as guard and I plan to get the hospital staff on board should MIL decided that something's about to go down and demand to stay in the room. I would update your birth plan and notify the hospital staff when you are headed for the delivery room. Also, if possible, I would try to get a family member on board to speak up on your behalf and act as a buffer if you MIL tries to barge in.
If all else fails, as @ColeRose said, you can always give her a call after LO is born.
EDIT: Andplusalso, if all else else fails, you could always pull out a can of whoop-ass out and blame it on the hormones!!! :P
Re: Possible delivery room drama?
BFP #2 EDD 10/2015
My hospital has the L&D floor locked, so no one is allowed in unless they are allowed by the mother.
The nurses will play bouncer.
Although, if she's made her intentions that clear, I wouldn't even tell her that you're in labor. Call after.
Why the hell do people think it's okay to demand things like this?!?
Also she makes a good point.
My Ovulation Chart
I say don't give in. She shouldn't receive ANY positive reinforcement for this kind of behavior. Otherwise you'll just see more of it in the future.
Remember, this is YOUR birth experience. She has no say in it.
But just for a fun thought experiment.... I love the idea of her being allowed in for your transition (during which some moms become fierce and have few inhibitions with their words). I delight a little bit in the fantasy about her being allowed in for that and being handed her ass on a platter by you, and then her never even thinking about trying to cross a line with you again. Maybe that could combat the phenomenon that @ mariahbowden describes.
PULL OUT A CAN OF WHOOP ASS CAUSE IT'S TRANSITION TIME!!!!!!!!!!!
)