2yo one-liners

ksulli

I was having my bedtime snuggle with DD last night and my stomach growled. She goes, "my baby makin' noise in there?"

Too cute. And I told her yes.

any one liners out of kids in your life recently?

Teresa1896

My DD's been saying, "Mommy! Don't say no to me!" When I tell her no to something (usually a request for Halloween candy).

Jessimax

My son is 3, the other morning as my DH was leaving for work my son said he would give DH "monies" if he would stay home with him. So cute, until he added, can't mommy go to work instead?

2bebes

My 2.5 DD hugged my husband since he was pretty tired after coming home from work, then school and told him "It's okay my princess, go to sleep you are tired"

ckred27

My 3 yr old unrolled a whole roll of toliet paper, I saw it and walked away meaning to clean it up, but just forgot (1 yr was hungry). Later on DH comes hom and sees the mess and asks Charlie why he unrolled the toilet paper and made a mess, his response 'Cuz you weren't here to stop me, Daddy' DH says firmly to clean it up right now, then comes in the bedroom and cracks up, at least the kid is honest!

ksulli

Ooopsbaby14 said:

This wasn't from my own, but from one of my preschool kids in the 2/3yr old class. We were washing up after painting and she told me she could "use some privacy" while washing her hands. I told her she didn't need privacy for that, lol.

My mom was a preschool teacher/director for years and came home with the best one liners.
my DD will also say, "leave me alone" when she's on the toilet, which would be fine, but she can't get off by herself.

SuzieQu4u

My [nearly] two year old yells "NO NACHO" instead of No Thank You whenever we tell her to do something she doesn't want to do... which is pretty much everything these days. 

When she was little, we tried to never tell her "no", rather we would say "no, thank you."  Have a toddler who yells NO THANK YOU in a grocery store is *almost* worth it.  

zoopsiedaisy

When my husband was a kid, like 3 or 4, his parents signed him up for day care/camp at church over the summer. He got upset so they were trying to tell him that it would be fun and was a good thing to which he replied, "You just want a piece uh quiet!" I love that story and can't wait for our LO to say things like this. :-)

Twirple

DS is very aware of how his behavior affects us right now.  If he does something naughty, he will look at me and say "You happy Mommy?" 

I'll reply, "No, I'm not, you need to behave."

Then he'll come over to me, apologize, give me a hug and kiss and say "You happy now?"

Yes, I always am!

steph1977

When my DD was 2, she saw me pour a glass of wine and stated, "Wine makes Mommy happy." She was right on!

emh81

My 2 year old niece was watching "Happy Feet" my husband came in and said "Zip can you dance like that?" And gave his best 5 second impression, she looked right at him and said "Uncle Matchew you are ridiculous"

eireyes

Not mine, but a friend is due with her third in February, and her oldest (3yo) is aware that "there's a baby in mommy's belly." One day while they were doing bedtime prayers, she asked if when the baby is born does it come out of her mouth?  I died when I heard that one, and apparently her dad did too, and had a hard time not laughing.

They had to explain it in age appropriate detail after that one...

jenskurn

My 20 mo old slept without her binky for the first time last night. She did great but when she woke up she was yelling "Daddy took my binkys! Daddy took all my binkys!" It was so funny to me bc she just decided to blame dh for no apparent reason. A true girl right there!

cdominique11

My 3 year old is going through this fighting phase (where does it come from? Idk). He hit me yesterday on my stomach, he looks at me shocked. I called his name and he kisses my belly and in sign says sorry baby. I couldn't get upset.