SLLLLLOOOOOWWWWW down. You are not almost over. It is not almost November. And I am not about to have a one year old and a 4 year old. No. No. No.
Signed, In denial
Dear DS2,
What is your deal? Why don't you like me anymore???? ( Why won't you nurse??? Please nurse. It makes life so much easier. I'll never be able to make it to a year if I have to exclusively pump!! Thank goodness I once upon a time had an oversupply and was able to build up a huge freezer stash. At this rate though, you'll gooble it all up before Thanksgiving.
Love, Mama who wants to nurse and not pump!
Dear DH,
Thank God we are done having infants. I never want to breastfed again!
If you're standing in front of an empty seat, sit down. If you're standing near the door and there's room in the middle of the car, move to the middle so other people can board the train. If you're standing near the door and can't move in, step off the car at the station and reboard so that people departing the train can get off. And take your newspapers with you when you leave!
Dear random posters on various message boards who think 30+ is too old to be pregnant,
Fuck off.
Dear sick coworker who came into work Monday and got sent home and then came into work yesterday and got sent home *again*,
If I get sick, I will make you pay. I'm not sure how, I'm not sure when, but you. will. pay.
Wishing I could smack most of the rest of the world with a good slap of etiquette, reality, and common sense,
I hope DS2 likes your boob again very soon. I understand the frustration your are feeling. I hope it works out.
~LoCarb
Dear DD2's teachers,
As you know I drop off before you (regular teachers) arrive. Well, each morning, DD2 insists on wearing big Sis's shoes, mis-matched shoes or flip flops. And each morning, I bring a pair of her shoes to change at school. Well today, I forgot. The shoes are left by the door. Yes, she looks ridiculous and may trip and fall. Please understand she prefers to dress herself and give her hugs if she falls. Thinking positive-there is 100% chance of rain today so no outdoor play. This is my explanation to you as I probably won't see during pick-up this afternoon. I'm going to be late...
~absent minded momma
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I don't mind a little rain, but could you please save the wind and thunderstorms for after trick-or-treating?
Respectfully, Uncharacteristically excited for Halloween this year
I 2nd this one!!! It's my DD's first Halloween and my 2 nieces (6yrs and 2yrs) are coming over to go trick or treating. Last year we didn't have a Halloween because of Hurricane Sandy so it would be really nice if the rain would hold out until tomorrow night.
If you're standing in front of an empty seat, sit down. If you're standing near the door and there's room in the middle of the car, move to the middle so other people can board the train. If you're standing near the door and can't move in, step off the car at the station and reboard so that people departing the train can get off. And take your newspapers with you when you leave!
Dear random posters on various message boards who think 30+ is too old to be pregnant,
Fuck off.
Dear sick coworker who came into work Monday and got sent home and then came into work yesterday and got sent home *again*,
If I get sick, I will make you pay. I'm not sure how, I'm not sure when, but you. will. pay.
Wishing I could smack most of the rest of the world with a good slap of etiquette, reality, and common sense,
The 5 days that you were gone hunting were absolutely the best. Things were so much easier for DS and I without you being the nuisance in the background. I also appreciate you throwing DSs jogging stroller in the middle of the yard on its side. How old are you?
Can you please remember that certain subjects shouldn't be discussed in front of children? I know you are frustrated with your family, but I don't want the kids feelings tainted by that.
Please stop biting my child. Bite a banana instead please. I've caught both of you on different occasions and I really try to respond reasonably but witnessing the whole thing makes me angry. Please stop - bananas are for biting, friends are not.
Signed,
Trying to contain the Mama Bear who is a lot scarier than your mother
Dear Person that broke in to my mom's car and stole my new purse on my birthday- You are an asshole. I always lean towards compassion and try to see the good in a situation, but you sir or madame, are unacceptable. I understand stealing the purse, but did you need to take the homemade birthday cards from my kids sitting next to the bag? The purse I will get over, the cards were precious to me. It looks like you cut your hand breaking the window due to blood on the seat and I hope it hurt bad. I also hope that you are arrested. Thanks for ruining a great day- The birthday girl
financialdiva
member
Re: Open Letter Wednesday
Dear 2013,
SLLLLLOOOOOWWWWW down. You are not almost over. It is not almost November. And I am not about to have a one year old and a 4 year old. No. No. No.
Signed, In denial
Dear DS2,
What is your deal? Why don't you like me anymore????
( Why won't you nurse??? Please nurse. It makes life so much easier. I'll never be able to make it to a year if I have to exclusively pump!! Thank goodness I once upon a time had an oversupply and was able to build up a huge freezer stash. At this rate though, you'll gooble it all up before Thanksgiving.
Love, Mama who wants to nurse and not pump!
Dear DH,
Thank God we are done having infants. I never want to breastfed again!
Love, DW
I don't mind a little rain, but could you please save the wind and thunderstorms for after trick-or-treating?
Respectfully,
Uncharacteristically excited for Halloween this year
I hope DS2 likes your boob again very soon. I understand the frustration your are feeling. I hope it works out.
~LoCarb
Dear DD2's teachers,
As you know I drop off before you (regular teachers) arrive. Well, each morning, DD2 insists on wearing big Sis's shoes, mis-matched shoes or flip flops. And each morning, I bring a pair of her shoes to change at school. Well today, I forgot. The shoes are left by the door. Yes, she looks ridiculous and may trip and fall. Please understand she prefers to dress herself and give her hugs if she falls. Thinking positive-there is 100% chance of rain today so no outdoor play. This is my explanation to you as I probably won't see during pick-up this afternoon. I'm going to be late...
~absent minded momma
Dear SO,
The 5 days that you were gone hunting were absolutely the best. Things were so much easier for DS and I without you being the nuisance in the background. I also appreciate you throwing DSs jogging stroller in the middle of the yard on its side. How old are you?
Sincerely,
Your SO who's attending counseling on her own
Dear DS,
Please start feeling better from your ear infection and go back to STTN, I need sleep too.
Signed,
One Sleepy Mama
Dear DH,
Can you please remember that certain subjects shouldn't be discussed in front of children? I know you are frustrated with your family, but I don't want the kids feelings tainted by that.
Signed, Just looking out for family feelings
You are an asshole. I always lean towards compassion and try to see the good in a situation, but you sir or madame, are unacceptable. I understand stealing the purse, but did you need to take the homemade birthday cards from my kids sitting next to the bag? The purse I will get over, the cards were precious to me. It looks like you cut your hand breaking the window due to blood on the seat and I hope it hurt bad. I also hope that you are arrested.
Thanks for ruining a great day-
The birthday girl