Single Parents

What is the hardest part for you?

Since DD was born, I never get to sleep 4 hours straight, I have to get up in the middle of the night to feed her and pump the milk (DD refuses to latch on), going to work at 9 in the morning. Wish I could have an entire day for me to sleep and chill doing nothing, but that is impossible for me. lol :) Just hoping DD could sleep all night without eating soon! She is 5 months now, time flies!! But I'm enjoying to be a part time mom, defiantly not a full time mom though :P 

What is the hardest part for you being a single mom? 
Pulpit rockBabyName Ticker

Re: What is the hardest part for you?

  • babymama619babymama619 member
    edited October 2013
    Oh god, maybe I shouldn't be reading this thread!!!

    I'm dreading going back to "work". When LO is 7-8 weeks old I have to start student teaching. It will mean we'll have to leave the house at 6am to get to my patents for baby drop off by 6:40 so I can get to school by 7a. Oh and it will be January in Chicago. I'm really nervous about how to make that all work with feeding and everything else. Oi!

    mimimimimiiii
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  • I miss not having to rush to take a shower. Ds gives me 15 minutes before he shrieks.

    I also miss drinking, i still havent had a drink because i partially co sleep and dont want to be under the influence with ds in my bed
    image
  • I think the pressure of knowing everything is always my responsibility is hardest for me. Of course my family helps, but it's really not the same as having a partner. If I forget something, or run out of energy, or have an emergency, or get sick- too bad. I know that married moms take on a lot of responsibility too, but at least they have someone to "tag team" with or call in for back-up when desperate for help. The daily routine stuff is hard, but it also sucks making all the decisions and arrangements alone without the support, input, and reassurance of the other parent. I am confident that I'm a great mom, but I am only one person, and I really hate that my son misses out sometimes because he only has me.
    Can't agree more! Plus even though having a new bf again, he is not baby daddy and I still feel like I'm the only one with my DD, because he can't do much to help, I won't expect anything from him too. I wish my BD could be in my DD's life but I don't want her to know him in the same time too! *Complicated feelings*
    Pulpit rockBabyName Ticker
    inthelost
  • Oh yeah, new BF's... Mine has completely been the best guy I could've ever asked for, but I still feel guilty when I wake up thinking "shit, I have to run to the crib so as not to wake him up!".  He doesn't understand why I don't just wake him up and let him try to comfort/feed/change her in the middle of the night. But I'm conflicted about that.  I want him to help because he wants to, but he's not her BD and I feel bad about making him help. 
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Roxalot said:
    Oh yeah, new BF's... Mine has completely been the best guy I could've ever asked for, but I still feel guilty when I wake up thinking "shit, I have to run to the crib so as not to wake him up!".  He doesn't understand why I don't just wake him up and let him try to comfort/feed/change her in the middle of the night. But I'm conflicted about that.  I want him to help because he wants to, but he's not her BD and I feel bad about making him help. 
     
    If he is volunteering to do it and you think he can handle it- I would absolutely let him try to handle a wake-up and see how he does. Whether he's the father or not doesn't matter, as long as he's a patient, loving, trustworthy person. No one would volunteer to wake up with someone else's newborn if they didn't truly want to. He's probably trying to be supportive and let you get some rest.

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  • Oh, he will get up and say "I got it." when DD does wake him up.  Sometimes he sleeps right through it, but when he doesn't, he tries to get out of bed before I do.  I know he can handle it, and he does a lot of taking care of her while he's over so that I can clean house or make dinner. I really wish biologically she was his, because in all other aspects I really feel like he is her daddy. I just have a hard time asking for help. Especially at 3am.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • I think for me it's knowing that ALL the responsibility is on my shoulders. also, i feel sad for my daughter because she will never know half her family. I fear that day when she ask me why she doesn't have a daddy...
    Liliana Seraphina born 9/5/2103


    rmajbusiness[Deleted User]
  • Well... that is going to be a pretty rough conversation.  I don't look forward to explaining to my DD about the difference between "father" and "daddy" and why her father isn't around.  I wish I didn't have to have that conversation at all, but my great grandma never knew who her father was, not even a name.  And that has plagued our family.  We are looking into finding some sort of investigator, seriously, because there is a whole part of our family tree that is missing.  I don't want to do that to my daughter.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Realizing he's all smoke and mirrors. He talks a very good game but in the end I'm left to do it all and to. pick up the broken pieces
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