Late Term and Child Loss

Missing my bump

First, I want to thank everyone on this board. I've been reading your posts for a few weeks now and they are comforting to me.

I recently lost my baby boy Raynor at 29 weeks. My husband and I were extremely excited when we found out we're pregnant on the 2nd IUI. Worry crept in when we went in for a anatomy ultrasound at 18 weeks and found out that he was measuring small. We had the amniocentesis done and everything came back normal. At 25 weeks, I went back to get an updated ultrasound and was told he is now measuring a few weeks behind. We met with a team of maternal fetal medicine doctors for them to tell us that our boy has 50/50 chance of surviving and he needs to be at least 500 grams by week 30 for them to offer any help, he was only 250grams at that time. How can this be, we have no history of pregnancy complication on both side of the family and the doctors have no explanation as to why. I had to go in for check up every week, and on week 28, I was told that my baby most likely will not make it pass a week. He was too small for them to help and sent me home. I did not feel him kicking as much, but was trying to stay optomistic, eating and drinking more than usual in hope to get him to double his size. I went back to my doctor the following day and his heart was still beating. 4 days later, I went back to my doctor for another appointment and they could not find a heart beat. We went to the hospital that night to be induced and he was born still the next morning. We held him in our arms and kept him with us until I was discharged later that day. He was so small and I could not protect him like a mother should.
I still touch my belly hoping that I would wake up from this nightmare and feel my baby kicking again. My husband and I never thought we would be making funeral arrangement for Raynor instead of shopping for crib and car seat.

Ticker id: ra2f

Ticker id: ra2f

BFP #2, EDD 12/26/14, please be our rainbow.

Re: Missing my bump

  • I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweet boy, Raynor. I hope that you able to find some comfort and support with this board. (((Hugs))) to you and your family.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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  • I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet son, Raynor. I'm sad you're joining this board, but welcome. What you're feeling is very normal. I remember feeling so empty after losing Eliott and that my body had failed him. It did feel like a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from. I hope posting here brings you some comfort.
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
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  • I am sorry for the loss of your precious son, Raynor.
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    TTC since 2008
    Dh:34, no issues.  Me:31, Endo, slightly hypothyroid, deformed ovary, paracentric inversion.
    4 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone +TI cycles= all BFN
    Lap in 2012 to remove large unresolving cyst discovered endo and double lobed ovary.
     6 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone IUI cycles= All BFN,
    1st IVF w/ICSI- June '13 Antagonist: Gonal-F, Menopur, Ganirelix, HcG, Estradiol, Crinone= 7 retrieved, 4 mature, 1 unfertilized, 2 abnormally fertilized, 1 normally fertilized.  2DT of only embryo and our miracle BFP.
    Our beloved baby boy was born sleeping Oct. 13, 2013 due to pROM/IC/Uterine infection.
    2nd IVF w/ICSI- Feb. '14 EPP/lupron/antagonist: Estrace, lupron, HGH, Gonal-F, Menopur, HcG, PIO, lovenox, doxy/dex.=21 retrieved, 16 mature, 15 fertilized!!  5dt of 1 blast/ 6 frozen. BFP!  Beta 1 9dp5dt:83.9  Beta 2: 11dp5dt: 145.2  Beta 3  14dp5dt: 497  Please be our sticky rainbow baby!

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    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

  • I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet Raynor.

    EDD 1/8/10 - our sweet sunshine DD born 12/30/09
    EDD 2/15/14 - Stillbirth at 21 wks 10/02/13
    EDD 8/12/15 - MMC 1/12/15
    EDD 12/24/15

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
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  • ***Siggy warning***

    I am so very sorry for your loss of Raynor. Please use this board as often or as little as you would like. It is a wonderful community of ladies, but we all know each day of this journey is different. And what you need one day may be very different from the next. It is absolutely awful when you are planning a funeral instead of a nursery. Wish I could give you ((hugs)).
    Lilypie - (qptF)

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."

  • So very sorry for the loss of your sweet baby boy Raynor. Wish you didn't have to be here but we are all here for you when you need us.

    Brooke Elizabeth born Feb 17, 2013 grew wings May 9, 2013 @ 11 weeks & 4 days old from SIDS



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  • Ticker warning

    I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet Raynor.  Please know you did everything you possibly could, and none of this is your fault.  But easier said than done, I can completely relate to the feelings of not being able to protect my baby.  I hate that you have to be here, but so glad you found us.  Big hugs to you, please feel free to post as little or as much as you need.
    Lilypie - (fm2j)

    Lilypie - (YesX)

     My Pregnancy/Parenting BLOG TTC since 5/2011, BFP #1 12/3/11, M/C 12/7/11 @ 4wks 2d. Began seeing RE Sep 2012. October 2012 Metformin 1500 mg= ovulation on CD34 BFP#2 11/14/12 9DPO, EDD 7/26/13, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks, our angel born sleeping 3/24/13 @ 22wks 2d. BFP #3 7/4/13 8DPO EDD 3/22/14, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks. started insulin @16 wks.  Our rainbow, born 3/19/14 @ 39wks 6d., we're so in love!


  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you find as much comfort and support on this board as I have. I remember staring at my belly when I got home from the hospital. I broke down because it didn't look the same anymore. It really was like a bad dream. I still wonder when I'm going to wake up. I'm so glad you had time to spend with your sweet Raynor. Those are the most precious moments. 
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersDaisypath Anniversary tickers

  • So sorry for your loss of Raynor. I totally know what your feeling as I look at my belly thinking my daughter will move. Take care of yourself and your hubby. We are here for you!!

  • Thank you ladies
    Ticker id: ra2f

    BFP #2, EDD 12/26/14, please be our rainbow.

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