Complete Meltdown

Number2forus

I had a complete meltdown today. It's been three weeks since I lost my baby girl and hasn't gotten easier. To make it worse my good friend has a son the same age as my son (toddlers) and we always hang out together and the boys are besties. She is due 5 weeks before I was. She just found out today she is having a girl. It was like throwing salt in the wound. Not only did I lose my girl but now I have to watch her be excited she is having a girl, see her newborn girl, etc. I dunno how to handle this.

TwinkleTor

aragosta said:

I don't know either. My cousin had her son just days after my Lucas died. I can't even talk to her right now.

Big hugs. I'm sorry. It sounds like our babies became angels about the same time.

I agree! There are parents at my job that I have to avoid because they are due around my same due date. I also avoid a parent that have birth the same week I have birth to Domenik. That parent kind of avoids me too I noticed though. I guess she feels just as awkward as I do. Avoidance isn't a bad this... Keep doing what you have to in order to keep your sanity! ((Hugs))

bunnybun4

3 weeks is NO time at all.  Trust me...looking back I remember when I was 3 weeks out and I forced myself to do things that I wasn't emotionally ready to do because I felt like "so much" time had passed.  3 weeks is no time at all after a total heartbreak like you have just gone through.  Please be patient with yourself...for me I found that everyday was really hard but each week I felt like things got a little better.  You really aren't going to feel like yourself for a long time and that is ok. 

My sil and I were also due at the same time and that was probably the hardest thing for me after we lost our baby.  I just had to set boundaries and set a lot of space between us.  Thankfully she understood.  You may want to write your friend a note just saying that you really can't handle talking about it right now.  Now that my nephews are here it usually isn't hard seeing them...it was at first but now it has defnintely gotten better.

((hugs))

mingaling2

That has to be so hard. I feel like I've been avoiding everyone who is expecting - it's just too much. You're still in so much pain - you have to do what is comfortable for you right now.  Thinking of you.

JessicaG220

Agreed completely with everyone above, hun. 3 weeks is still so very fresh. I am 6 months out and most days I still cry at least once. And I have yet to hold another newborn. It will hurt for a while. Don't expect too much from yourself. We have been through hell and it's rightfully tough. Big hugs!!!