Ttc under 20?

BankerBSN

Ban dodging is against TOS. 

tsk tsk

janda426

byegurlbye said:

janda426 said:

Wait why was the librarian banned? Was it ever proven that was lovely?

Yes.

Oh. I miss all the good stuff

BankerBSN

CMSullivan326

byegurlbye said:

janda426 said:

Wait why was the librarian banned? Was it ever proven that was lovely?

Yes.


Whoa. What the fuck.

Spookster

Not surprised :-q

amberhoothoot

AngelinaMarie26 said:

AngelinaMarie26 said:

What are your opinions? I currently know girl that is 16 and ttc! What do you think about ttc under 20? My stand point is that if you are graduated, in a committed relationship, have the money, don't live with mommy and daddy then go for it. It's your life. However I feel like everything I said fits more into the 18-20 category.... Actually ttc at 16 and still living at home? Eh. Nah. I just think that a rule of thumb should be you shouldn't ttc if you are still completely dependent on someone else. Ex. Parents, grandparents, etc. All that being said this is not bashing anyone who had kids younger than 18 whether it was not planned or planned because I know so awesome young moms. To me age doesn't define maturity.

Unplanned under 18 is one thing. And 18+ and planned, sure, if you are ready.

But PLANNED under 18?!?... No. Stop it. I am absolutely judging you. Andplusalso, What the hell is wrong with this girls family/friends not talking sense into her? I doubt the boyfriend is "trying".

Oh no no he boyfriend IS indeed trying. The sixteen year Olds mom even took her to the ob to get blood testing and her bf a SA because the sixteen year old has been trying for around 10 months (:| Also, the 14 year old, yea her boyfriend is also trying. It's crazy.

What the fuck? I'm sorry, if I was an OB who had a mother show up with a 16 year old asking for blood testing because she was trying to get knocked up, I'm pretty sure I would be calling in some kind of psychiatric help. What doctor would ever do an SA for a teenage boy (unless this boy is not a teenager, in which case, isn't that some version of rape?). None of this is making sense. This mom sounds terrible.

oneblessedmess

GhostMonkey said:

amberhoothoot said:

AngelinaMarie26 said:

amberhoothoot said:

AngelinaMarie26 said:

What are your opinions? I currently know girl that is 16 and ttc! What do you think about ttc under 20? My stand point is that if you are graduated, in a committed relationship, have the money, don't live with mommy and daddy then go for it. It's your life. However I feel like everything I said fits more into the 18-20 category.... Actually ttc at 16 and still living at home? Eh. Nah.

I just think that a rule of thumb should be you shouldn't ttc if you are still completely dependent on someone else. Ex. Parents, grandparents, etc.

All that being said this is not bashing anyone who had kids younger than 18 whether it was not planned or planned because I know so awesome young moms. To me age doesn't define maturity.

Unplanned under 18 is one thing. And 18+ and planned, sure, if you are ready.

But PLANNED under 18?!?... No. Stop it. I am absolutely judging you. Andplusalso, What the hell is wrong with this girls family/friends not talking sense into her? I doubt the boyfriend is "trying".

Oh no no he boyfriend IS indeed trying. The sixteen year Olds mom even took her to the ob to get blood testing and her bf a SA because the sixteen year old has been trying for around 10 months

(:|

Also, the 14 year old, yea her boyfriend is also trying. It's crazy.

What the fuck? I'm sorry, if I was an OB who had a mother show up with a 16 year old asking for blood testing because she was trying to get knocked up, I'm pretty sure I would be calling in some kind of psychiatric help. What doctor would ever do an SA for a teenage boy (unless this boy is not a teenager, in which case, isn't that some version of rape?). None of this is making sense. This mom sounds terrible.


Doctor's don't do any touching in an SA. That's pretty insulting to rape victims that you would compare a medical professional analyzing a semen sample that the boy produced on his own to being raped. 

I may be wrong but I think she was saying that if the boy is not a teenager (over 18) then it may be statutory rape for him to be trying to knock up a 16 year old.

amberhoothoot

NellyBluth said:

GhostMonkey said:

amberhoothoot said:

AngelinaMarie26 said:

AngelinaMarie26 said:

What are your opinions? I currently know girl that is 16 and ttc! What do you think about ttc under 20? My stand point is that if you are graduated, in a committed relationship, have the money, don't live with mommy and daddy then go for it. It's your life. However I feel like everything I said fits more into the 18-20 category.... Actually ttc at 16 and still living at home? Eh. Nah. I just think that a rule of thumb should be you shouldn't ttc if you are still completely dependent on someone else. Ex. Parents, grandparents, etc. All that being said this is not bashing anyone who had kids younger than 18 whether it was not planned or planned because I know so awesome young moms. To me age doesn't define maturity.

Unplanned under 18 is one thing. And 18+ and planned, sure, if you are ready.

But PLANNED under 18?!?... No. Stop it. I am absolutely judging you. Andplusalso, What the hell is wrong with this girls family/friends not talking sense into her? I doubt the boyfriend is "trying".

Oh no no he boyfriend IS indeed trying. The sixteen year Olds mom even took her to the ob to get blood testing and her bf a SA because the sixteen year old has been trying for around 10 months (:| Also, the 14 year old, yea her boyfriend is also trying. It's crazy.

What the fuck? I'm sorry, if I was an OB who had a mother show up with a 16 year old asking for blood testing because she was trying to get knocked up, I'm pretty sure I would be calling in some kind of psychiatric help. What doctor would ever do an SA for a teenage boy (unless this boy is not a teenager, in which case, isn't that some version of rape?). None of this is making sense. This mom sounds terrible.

Doctor's don't do any touching in an SA. That's pretty insulting to rape victims that you would compare a medical professional analyzing a semen sample that the boy produced on his own to being raped. 

I think she meant that if the potential baby daddy is not a teen, his having sex with a 16 year old would be statutory rape. I hope so, anyway.

Yes, thats what I meant, sorry.

amberhoothoot

GhostMonkey said:

In most states it is not statutory rape for a 16 year old and an 18 year old to have sex. Many states have Romeo and Juliet laws that allow for a certain age gap (here it is 3 years) and many others the age of consent is 15 or 16 across the board anyway.

I did not know that. So I guess my previous comment is probably moot then.

coopsbaby

Another young mom here. Had my first planned at 18 (pregnant at 17), second (also planned) at 21 and third (again planned) at 24. Their dad and I were financially stable, had a nice apartment, car paid off, both out of high school and were ready. I loved having my kids young, I had so much energy for them. And I'm sure it didn't hurt that my oldest was a VERY good baby. It did make college for me more of a challenge (it took me 7 years to graduate), but I wouldn't change it for anything. 

That being said, I know we were a huge exception, and for the most part waiting till 25 or so is a way better plan. All of the friends I had from high school who also were teen moms it didn't work out well. Many didn't graduate, were really bad moms, in and out of bad relationships, etc. I've made my kids promise not to have babies before they graduate from college. (We'll see how far that gets me!)

LeadMitten

Doctor, parent, member of the community, or other wise I feel like someone should be calling CPS. No one is protecting these "children" from themselves. They have no idea what they are doing by trying to have a child right now. Where are the other adults who should be the voice of reason. People be wack. Jeesh

LeadMitten

GhostMonkey said:

caitleah said:

Doctor, parent, member of the community, or other wise I feel like someone should be calling CPS. No one is protecting these "children" from themselves. They have no idea what they are doing by trying to have a child right now. Where are the other adults who should be the voice of reason. People be wack. Jeesh

CPS has enough actual abuse/neglect cases to worry about that they don't need to be picking up all of this. 

And you are pretty naive to assume that the parents aren't always involved. 

Yes CPS is very busy, but it doesn't mean a situation like this doesn't need to be looked into. I also think that a lot of time the parents ARE involved in some way. For all we know the mother in this situation is pressuring these kids, or this girl is being abused in some way and looking for unconditional love in a infant, or they're all bat shit crazy. Until someone that is qualified looks into the mental/emotional state of this family this craziness will never end.

A parents should protect and help their children and obviously this mother is doing a shitty job by encouraging these kids to become parents at 14 and 16.

Pintobean39

So lovely was one of the people in chat Friday night that wasn't talking?

mak7788

 

caitleah said:

caitleah said:

Doctor, parent, member of the community, or other wise I feel like someone should be calling CPS. No one is protecting these "children" from themselves. They have no idea what they are doing by trying to have a child right now. Where are the other adults who should be the voice of reason. People be wack. Jeesh

CPS has enough actual abuse/neglect cases to worry about that they don't need to be picking up all of this. 

And you are pretty naive to assume that the parents aren't always involved. 

Yes CPS is very busy, but it doesn't mean a situation like this doesn't need to be looked into. I also think that a lot of time the parents ARE involved in some way. For all we know the mother in this situation is pressuring these kids, or this girl is being abused in some way and looking for unconditional love in a infant, or they're all bat shit crazy. Until someone that is qualified looks into the mental/emotional state of this family this craziness will never end. A parents should protect and help their children and obviously this mother is doing a shitty job by encouraging these kids to become parents at 14 and 16.

Ok can't resist anymore. I used to be a case manger for CPS (since moved onto healthcare, because CPS is just too soul crushing, I still have nightmares). Two consenting teenagers trying to have a baby is NOT by law child abuse or neglect in our state, even if the parents know about it. We recieved so many reports about these situations. We are mandated to investigate each call, but 99.9% of them were determined "unfounded"

LeadMitten

GhostMonkey said:

caitleah said:

GhostMonkey said:

caitleah said:

Doctor, parent, member of the community, or other wise I feel like someone should be calling CPS. No one is protecting these "children" from themselves. They have no idea what they are doing by trying to have a child right now. Where are the other adults who should be the voice of reason. People be wack. Jeesh

CPS has enough actual abuse/neglect cases to worry about that they don't need to be picking up all of this. 

And you are pretty naive to assume that the parents aren't always involved. 

Yes CPS is very busy, but it doesn't mean a situation like this doesn't need to be looked into. I also think that a lot of time the parents ARE involved in some way. For all we know the mother in this situation is pressuring these kids, or this girl is being abused in some way and looking for unconditional love in a infant, or they're all bat shit crazy. Until someone that is qualified looks into the mental/emotional state of this family this craziness will never end.

A parents should protect and help their children and obviously this mother is doing a shitty job by encouraging these kids to become parents at 14 and 16.

I would rather they spend what little time and money they have focusing on toddlers and infants being beat and not fed and having their actual life being in danger as opposed to a smiley happy future, but apparently we disagree there. 

In a perfect world where CPS is rolling in dough and states have unlimited money to have unlimited mental health help for everyone, you idea I guess could fly, but who are you to determine what is right for someone else? I'll judge them, but I'm not calling CPS on them. 

GhostMonkey said:

caitleah said:

GhostMonkey said:

caitleah said:

Doctor, parent, member of the community, or other wise I feel like someone should be calling CPS. No one is protecting these "children" from themselves. They have no idea what they are doing by trying to have a child right now. Where are the other adults who should be the voice of reason. People be wack. Jeesh

CPS has enough actual abuse/neglect cases to worry about that they don't need to be picking up all of this. 

And you are pretty naive to assume that the parents aren't always involved. 

Yes CPS is very busy, but it doesn't mean a situation like this doesn't need to be looked into. I also think that a lot of time the parents ARE involved in some way. For all we know the mother in this situation is pressuring these kids, or this girl is being abused in some way and looking for unconditional love in a infant, or they're all bat shit crazy. Until someone that is qualified looks into the mental/emotional state of this family this craziness will never end.

A parents should protect and help their children and obviously this mother is doing a shitty job by encouraging these kids to become parents at 14 and 16.

I would rather they spend what little time and money they have focusing on toddlers and infants being beat and not fed and having their actual life being in danger as opposed to a smiley happy future, but apparently we disagree there. 

In a perfect world where CPS is rolling in dough and states have unlimited money to have unlimited mental health help for everyone, you idea I guess could fly, but who are you to determine what is right for someone else? I'll judge them, but I'm not calling CPS on them. 

Come on GM of course I want children to be fed and safe. I guess I am slightly naive in the fact that I am from a very small community where our resources aren't stretched as thinly. I am talked out on this thread. You always have good valid points GM.

I am out I have work in the morning.

GirlOnTheBeach

Where I taught (public inner-city high school) our school provided a free daycare program for our students' kids. Teen pregnancy skyrocketed so fast because they all wanted to get pregnant so they could get checks in the mail to buy stuff they wanted and they also got to have teachers come from school to their homes to teach them so they could stay home if they wanted (for free).

It was ridiculous! 12 of my 80 students were parents (that's just one semester alone). One was a 15 year old who got pregnant when she was 14 with her boyfriend (also 14) and it was a PLANNED PREGNANCY!!! They felt their 6 month relationship made them ready for parenting and all the incentives from the school plus the free daycare made it the perfect time! It made me sick to see how things worked there.

MMIII12

I very much disagree.. 16 your still young and have so much life to live still.. Be young and do what kids ur age do not try and settle down an bring such a huge responsibility in ur life.. The fatherly not feel the same way after the child is born so they would be left with all the responsibility and finatually would e very hard!!!