Things are not good (warning, long)

xladybassx

I went to the MFM today and was told, quite bluntly, that baby A might die. She has grown since my last appt 3 weeks ago, but not much. At only 15 ounces she is in the 4th percentile for size. 3 weeks ago she was in the 16th percentile. The Doppler shows inconsistent blood flow through the umbilical cord, which I guess is the main reason for the possibility of death. The doctor talked about possibly delivering soon, but at 23 weeks it would be unlikely for her to survive if we delivered now. Apparently I also tested positive for CMV (some kind of virus), and they are running more tests to see if it is something I was exposed to long ago or if the exposure was recent. If the exposure was recent the baby could have caught the virus and that could also explain her issues. The good news is if that is the case, it can be treated. I have to go back on Monday for another Doppler reading. In the meantime, they put me on baby asprin which may help blood flow through the cord, and was told to drink 3 ensure shakes every day to try and put on more weight as quickly as possible. If the reading on Monday still looks bad they want to admit me to the hospital for steroid injections and further monitoring. The idea would be to do everything possible to enhance the growth of the girls' lungs before a likely early delivery. Of course, he said we would also have the option of "sacrificing" baby A and just let nature do what it wants so that at least baby B could have longer in the womb to mature, and hopefully make it to term. I don't even know what to think about that. The idea just sounds so horrific to me I can't really wrap my head around it in any rational sort of way. I am confused by the drastic slowing of baby A's growth, when I have been feeling her getting stronger. She kicks all day long, in fact she is kicking me as I am writing this. She was moving all over the place during my ultrasound today. If she is not getting enough nutrition, how/why is she this active? I want to hold on to hope and believe that my active baby is just fine and the doctors just took inaccurate measurements, but I am so scared I just don't know how much I can remain hopeful. The good news is that baby B is looking awesome. She was only in the 5th percentile 3 weeks ago and she has now grown to the 18th! She is far less active than baby A, but still kicks a few times per day. Her measurements are all very proportionate, which is a great considering last time I was told her femur, stomach, and head were too small. Sorry this is so long...it was all so much to take in this morning and I am still trying to make sense of it all. Once again, I was alone for this appt as my husband is away training so I have to handle this on my own for the time being. Anyway, thanks for listening.

xladybassx

Woah, sorry about the lack of paragraphs. For some reason new bump doesn't register paragraph breaks when I post from my iPad.

sunflowermama42212

I'm so sorry and I have no advice but I'll keep you and the babies in my prayers.

Crystal120410

I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I have no advice but hopefully things turn around and end up better than predicted. Best of luck to uou lady.

hootie123

OMG - I am so very sorry.   I really hope things turn around at your next appt.   I will be thinking of you, your husband and your babies during this difficult time. 

twistsandturnsto2

T&P for you! I am so sorry you are facing this.

diamante1181

Oh my, I'm so sorry you have such a horrible decision to make. I don't even know what I would do if it were me. Anything can happen though, and for all we know baby A will turn it all around and be fine! t & p love

ForevAAROSE

So sorry. Really hoping the ensure and baby aspirin works for little princess. I think from my experience that the readings aren't always accurate. Yes they can see she's behind but all of the outcomes may not be 100% . Especially having twins often times its hard to get a positive answer. Drink up and try to put on some weight. I think the little girls will be just fine. Remember that by law, the docs always have to tell you every possibility. Sometimes one twin grows faster than the other, that's one of the down sides of having twins. I knew a girl that had twins one came 5lbs one came 3 lbs. 5lb baby was a okay, 3 lb baby stayed in the nicu for 2 months, and had some developmental delays but is now great.

Fx and prayers your way. I know how tough it is to go alone, that's how I feel when I go to the cardiologist. Ugh. Keep us updated please! Stay strong

monimu13

So, so sorry that you are going through this.  CMV stands for cytomeglovirus.  This virus is not a big deal to your or I, and just shows up as flu or cold like symptoms.  The problem is that if you were not infected and have antibodies prior to your pregnancy, and contract the virus during your first trimester or early second trimester..this can lead to growth restriction, liver dysfunction, and calcium deposits in the brain causing further developmental complications..there are different severities of the infection of course.  There is technically no treatment for CMV because its a virus (like a viral cold or something).  There are a couple of antiviral medications that are used in congenital CMV infections to help minimize complications. Then you can treat the symptoms after birth.  I am definitely not telling you all of this to scare you, but congenital CMV is a big deal and I want you to have all the information that is possible.  

I have everything crossed for Baby A and that she gains some good weight in the next couple days and proves those doctors wrong.  

(((Hugs)))

Gr8te

I'm so sorry you're going through this. ((HUGS))

RoseHQ12

I am so sorry you are dealing with this I hope your DH won't be gone for too long, that is so much to handle on your own. You may have some impossible decisions to make, maybe a second opinion would be worth considering? I really pray it doesn't come to that & things start to improve soon. Sending lots of growing vibes to your precious LOs. Hugs.

TJ1979

Oh hon, I am so very sorry for everything you are going through.  Especially having to hear this news alone.  Big hugs to you, and sending lots of T&P to you and the girls.  GL at your next appointment.

ForevAAROSE

monimu13 said:

So, so sorry that you are going through this.  CMV stands for cytomeglovirus.  This virus is not a big deal to your or I, and just shows up as flu or cold like symptoms.  The problem is that if you were not infected and have antibodies prior to your pregnancy, and contract the virus during your first trimester or early second trimester..this can lead to growth restriction, liver dysfunction, and calcium deposits in the brain causing further developmental complications..there are different severities of the infection of course.  There is technically no treatment for CMV because its a virus (like a viral cold or something).  There are a couple of antiviral medications that are used in congenital CMV infections to help minimize complications. Then you can treat the symptoms after birth.  I am definitely not telling you all of this to scare you, but congenital CMV is a big deal and I want you to have all the information that is possible.  

I have everything crossed for Baby A and that she gains some good weight in the next couple days and proves those doctors wrong.  

(((Hugs)))

Absolutely love your detailed response.
Ladybass- hope this gives you more insight.
Praying for you

htn1763

I'm really sorry you are dealing with this. Fingers crossed she grows by the next appointment. T&P.

curlylocks3

I'm so sorry for the news you got. I will be thinking of you and your girls and hoping that things can still turn around for baby A.

PhillyJ33

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I will keep you and your little girls in my thoughts and prayers and I really hope everything turns out okay.

74dragonfly

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I hope the aspirin and shakes help. I don't know if you post on multiples board but maybe someone over ther can help.

oO Angie Oo

I can't even imagine what you're going through. My heart literally ached as I read your post. Praying for Gods healing hands to be wrapped around your little baby in there!! Please keep us updated!!

lizrn1975

Thinking of you during this incredibly difficult time.

luvboston

Ask them about heparin to help with the flow and did they say your placenta is ok?
Also did they find anything at your anatomy scan? The reason I ask is because my friend had a baby with CMV and it has a calcification on the brain. If the baby had CMV the serious kind the baby would have some kind of defect.

Keephope2012

So sorry to hear all of this. Positive vibes to your LOs!

jezebel57

oh wow... i'm absolutely speechless.  my heart is breaking for you and all the stress you must be under right now.  i'm so sorry you are going through this and am sending every positive thought in my body your way that your little ones continue to grow.  Hopefully the aspirin and protein will help, even if you have to deliver early. I have 2 close friends who delivered at 23 weeks 4 days and 24 weeks and their girls are now 4 and 12, so it is possible to have a success story.  thinking of you... 

golfrgal

I'm sorry you are going through this.  If it's any consolation, my friend just had a similar scenario happen to her (except for the virus part).  

She was admitted to the hospital at 28 weeks and has been there since (two weeks).  One baby was much tinier than the other and not getting enough nutrients through the cord.  She was also put on baby aspirin and Ensure.  The wonderful doctors and nurses monitoring my friend and her babies's heartbeats were able to keep them in utero as long as possible, and then finally called for a c-section delivery on Monday (30 weeks).  Although my friend was told that worst case scenario is that the small baby may deliver sleeping, both came out alive and the tiny one is even a screamer!  

Both babies appear to be doing fine in the NICU, but one is only 2 lbs. while the other is 3 lbs.  It looks like they are both fighters and just need to put on some weight now.  I hope yours will be a similar outcome.  I hope this gives you hope!  All of us PAIFers are pulling for you and your LOs!

GermanGirl2007

Oh my goodness - how stressful. I can't even imagine what you must be feeling. Sending lots of positive thoughts your way that the baby aspirin and weight gain help and that things look better on Monday. I am so sorry you are going through this.

MJC1116

I'm so terribly sorry you are dealing with this, but please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope baby a makes a big growth turnaround like baby b has from the shakes and aspirin.

xladybassx

Thank you all for the positive thoughts and prayers. This is so insane, it feels so surreal. Luckily my husband is supposed to be home tomorrow, and he actually should be able to come to my appointment on Monday. @luvboston, I will ask about heparin, thank you for the suggestion. @monimu13, thanks for clarifying CMV for me. My doctor didn't really explain it further than saying the antibodies worked similarly to chicken pox or mono. Your thorough explanation is a bit scarier, but I really would rather know the facts, so thank you. Again, thank you all for the support. I don't know how I could handle this without you!

imoverit

Huge hugs mama. That could not have been easy to hear. Prayers sent your way. Im really sorry you are going through this. Hope Monday brings the best of news.

zazu13

Hugs and prayers for you and babies!

danalawrence

Scary times, and big hugs!

Julie21613

sending you lots of T&P's....

JewelsW1980

I have no words.  We will be praying for all three of you!!  I'm sorry that you're taking this on alone right now.  Big hugs.

daiseydooda

I'm so sorry sending you lots of prayers. 

rcnavywife

I am so sorry you are going through this, especially while your DH is away. My thoughts and prayers will be with you, your DH and your sweet babies.

PurpleIris30

Oh goodness - I'm so sorry.  How stressful, especially without having your husband there.  I'll keep you and your babies in my thoughts and hope both thrive.