Death Glare From Another Mommy

sschwege

So I took my two kids plus the little boy I babysit for to story time at the library.  I sat way in the back with the two babies and DD sat up front with the other kids her age.  DS has a cough and was coughing during story time.  It's a pretty strong cough and he was coughing frequently, let's say once every 4-5 minutes.  At one point a mother turned around and looked our way, I just smiled at her and she gave me this dirty look and turned back around.  I'm guessing she was upset because I had a child there who had a cough.  DH had a mild cold about a week ago.  DD and I never really got it and DS ended up with a cough.  He never had a fever, just a runny nose when he wakes up (his nose was NOT running during story-time) and this cough.  In all other ways he was fine, happy, alert, active (which is why we have to sit in the back), he's obviously not in bad shape.  I always covered his mouth when he coughed, that type of thing. 

I saw another boy with an extremely runny nose use his entire hand to wipe snot all over then run to pick up a book.  I mean it's getting to be that time of year, I just don't see how you would ever get out if you waited until your kids were totally symptom free to take them somewhere.  Thoughts?

JMU_Bride09

She sounds like she has unrealistic expectations of other parents. She should save her glares for parents with seriously sick kids out in public.

kgs0505

Yeah, kids get colds, they cough... what's the big deal?  My kid gets the worst post nasal drip, it causes coughing.  But he's not necessarily sick.

TiffanyBerry

I felt similar to how that mom expressed herself the first few weeks.  And then reality caught up with me, and I realized it really wasn't so healthy to be staying home all the time because my daughter had a tiny cold.  She can get over herself, just like I had to. :P

AimeeL85

I wouldn't worry about it.  Sometimes if we're around a kid who obviously has a cold, I think "ugh, I hope my kids don't get sick" but I really don't fault the mom unless it's really, really bad.  I know what it's like - my kids get colds a LOT.  If I waited until they were completely symptom free before we went anywhere, they'd be in the house the vast majority of September - April.  I use my judgment and keep them in until the worst passes, and then we need to venture out.

Also, if everyone kept their kids home when they had the sniffles, my kids probably wouldn't have them to begin with - if they're not staying home all the time, neither are we!

Snow1010

If she walked into a daycare she'd really have a nervous breakdown

BeanNut

Agree with PP's... our kids get frequent coughs/colds.  We still take them out as long as they are fever-free.

aglenn

Sounds like first time mom syndrome on her part.  She'll get over it, especially if she has another kid and enters the endless cycle of them getting each other sick all fall/winter.  I wouldn't worry about it at all.  Unless somebody has a fever or is puking we go on about our business.

jaylynn808

Interestingly, my daughter's school tells parents to send kids to school even if they have a cold do long as they are fairly healthy otherwise. They just push lots of hand washing, sanitizer, keeping hands away from face, and coughing in tissues or elbow. If we kept our kid home at every onset of a cold, I would never be able to work and my kids would never be in school. In your case, it was a little one who sat in back and likely touched nothing. Don't even sweat it. She was probably more upset over the noise which is just as unreasonable.

JoJoGee

JMU_Bride09 said:

She sounds like she has unrealistic expectations of other parents. She should save her glares for parents with seriously sick kids out in public.

I'm curious what you consider "seriously sick?" Should my child not be allowed out of the house because she has a host of medical issues (trach, g-tube, lung issues, etc.)? Or, are you talking about vomiting, fever and contagious disease? I will point out that even in the latter example, vomiting is not always a symptom of something 'serious.' My daughter vomits at least once a week, when she is eating by mouth.

OP, you don't know the mother's story. Perhaps her child has a compromised immune system. Perhaps her child has hearing issues and your child's coughing was making it difficult for her child to hear the story. Maybe she was just having a grumpy day. I urge you to cut her some slack and let it go, even if she didn't afford you the same luxury.

dairygirl19

Meh. Who cares?

Other parents love to complain about other parents.

If you know you're kid wasn't spreading germs/sick then let it go.

Soap1

JoJoGee said:

She sounds like she has unrealistic expectations of other parents. She should save her glares for parents with seriously sick kids out in public.

I'm curious what you consider "seriously sick?" Should my child not be allowed out of the house because she has a host of medical issues (trach, g-tube, lung issues, etc.)? Or, are you talking about vomiting, fever and contagious disease? I will point out that even in the latter example, vomiting is not always a symptom of something 'serious.' My daughter vomits at least once a week, when she is eating by mouth. OP, you don't know the mother's story. Perhaps her child has a compromised immune system. Perhaps her child has hearing issues and your child's coughing was making it difficult for her child to hear the story. Maybe she was just having a grumpy day. I urge you to cut her some slack and let it go, even if she didn't afford you the same luxury.

I'm sure the poster you quoted meant, if the child has Hand Foot and Mouth or strep throat or something, they shouldn't be in public.  General colds/coughs in my opinion are not "seriously sick" and are fair game for being out in public.  Highly contagious diseases beyond the standard colds and coughs are grounds for keeping your kid home.  Non-contagious medical issues (like a trach) are obviously not affecting my kids in the least, so of course there's no reason to keep a child or adult with one at home.

abrazz

My kids are always coughing or sneezing.  I'm just thankful for modern medicine and germ-x.

 

rlyttle

I'm a total hypocrite. When other kids are sick I'm like "keep that kid home!!". When DS is sick I'm like "he's fine!!". hahaha 

Babalonia

My kid has had a cough for almost a month. No fever, no other symptoms. Brought him to the Pedi he said it could be from his molars. Regardless I still take him out and about. I think we as parents should know when they should be home and when it's ok to go out. Our Pedi always tells us colds and coughs can last a while, if it's alleriges even longer.

doublefiesta

My mom friends and I, as well as our daycare, observe the 24-hour rule for fever, vomiting, and diarrhea. Run of the mill coughs and colds are not a big deal.

If a child is really sick then s/he is likely to be miserable if taken out in public, just like adults. I leave it up to the parent's best judgment if they're better off home or out.