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tatianaazulay

I am having my first baby in December and I thought I wasn't having a baby shower because I live in a different state from my friends and family. Well, this weekend my mother in law said she would like to throw me a shower because she wants to celebrate the baby with her family!!! I was super excited and very thankful. Since se is throwing the shower she told me she will make the guest list and told me is just for her side of the family and I don't get to invite any friends. The problem now is that I only have one friend that I would like to invite. She is my husbands partners wife and has been to lots of family events with my mother in laws family. Should I insist on her inviting my friend or just let it go? I know my friend will be upset if she doesn't get invited cause I always go to her family events.

ArgyleBride

My advice is, don't build it up into a big brouhaha, just bring it up casually to your MIL.  "Winnefred has been asking me about the shower, I wanted to check whether she was invited before I shared my excitement," "winnefred has been asking...what do you think I should tell her?" "Winnefred is really excited about the shower--I hope there's a spot for her?"  You get the idea.  I don't think it would be rude.

EastCoastBride

ArgyleBride said:

My advice is, don't build it up into a big brouhaha, just bring it up casually to your MIL.  "Winnefred has been asking me about the shower, I wanted to check whether she was invited before I shared my excitement," "winnefred has been asking...what do you think I should tell her?" "Winnefred is really excited about the shower--I hope there's a spot for her?"  You get the idea.  I don't think it would be rude.

I agree. But I also agree w/ the 1st poster - it's a shower, not a wedding.  If your friend would really be "offended", that's on her.  Not you or your MIL.  It's really not your friends place to dictate that she "must" be invited anyhow.

RibbitGrl930

I honestly wouldn't say anything. As the hostess, your MIL gets final say on the guestlist. Besides, if your friend really is usually on the guestlist for your MIL's other events, your MIL will likely invite her herself, especially if she knows you are close.

Shobb414

I think it's really weird that you can't even add a friend to the list. It is for you anyways.... If my mil had a party for me with only her family I would be so uncomfortable! I would bring a friend anyways

SallyBLT

I totally get where you're coming from OP, but just roll with it and be grateful that MIL is throwing you a shower.   There will be many of opportunities between now and December (and certainly after) for your friend to feel included if whe wishes to be. A baby shower is a very special occasion, however, its  not a wedding - she should not take offense at all to be excluded, especially when it's out of state and just for familly.

Take it all in and fret pas!

tatianaazulay

Thank you for all your answers! My MIL asked me to come over to her house today to see some details of the shower and she asked me if there was anybody else that I wanted to invite. She was very nice when I mentioned my friend! I guess I was stressing over nothing. Thanks again